From Chronic Pain To Inner Power - with Psychotherapist, Hypnotherapist, & Author - Ravinder Taylor

[00:00:00] Intro: Ravinder Taylor is a voice for grounded wisdom, scientific insight, and lived transformation. With a degree in microbiology, formal training in psychotherapy and hypnotherapy, and decades of collaboration with best-selling author Eldon Taylor, Ravinder has spent over 30 years exploring how the mind shapes every part of our lives. She's co-authored more than 200 personal development programs, but her most personal work yet is Mind Training: The Science of Self-Empowerment. I read it. It's great. A book born from research, resilience, and her own self-healing journey after being diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. This conversation goes deep in into subconscious rewiring, optimism, identity, and the real mechanics for inner change. Ravinder doesn't offer cliches or hype. She offers real tools for real transformation. Let's get into it. Junkyard Love podcast. At what age do we learn how to act better? Junkyard Love podcast. Hey, welcome to the podcast. Who are you and what is it that you do?

[00:00:55] Ravinder: Well, hi Jacob. Thanks so much for having me on. I am Ravinder Taylor. Um, I'm there's lots of things. You know, when you try to say who am I, that's a really big a really big question. I'm fascinated with the power of the mind. And so, that's a huge aspect of my world is trying to find out why we do what we do. Um, and not only on, you know, from a theoretical perspective, but from a very practical perspective. I'm all about becoming the best version of myself possible. And they do say, you teach what it is that you want to learn. And so, as I'm learning more about how to become the best version of me, then as I teach that to other people, I get a much deeper grounding in that. So, yeah, it's all about be becoming the best the best version of me. It's not about being superwoman or being perfect in any way. It's about removing the blockages in my life so that I can express my authentic self.

[00:00:55] Jacob: Yeah. Wonderful. Okay. So, how did how did you land all of that information that you've gathered over all these years of living your life and accumulating all of this wealth of information? How did it land into the book Mind Training?

[00:00:56] Ravinder: Actually, that was a little bit accidental. My husband is Eldon Taylor. He is a New York Times best-selling author. He's created the patented inner talk subliminal technology. So, I've spent a great deal of time working in the background supporting him with his work, doing lots of the research. I do lots of the editing. But then I came across a scientific paper that grabbed my Interest for strange reasons. Actually, This particular scientific study, they were talking about a 12minute meditation that was shown to enhance cognitive abilities, reverse dementia, improve health. It was having all of these very definite positive results and that's fascinating. But it was the meditation itself that grabbed my attention and showed me that I have a lot to contribute. I've got my own stories, my own experiences, my own perspective. So, this particular meditation, you may have heard of it, is the Sarta Nama. I have it. It's a simple 12minute meditation. Um, as I said, fabulous results. They've done follow-up research on it. So they've approached it from different perspectives and it has been shown over and over again to improve cognitive abilities and reverse dementia, maybe reverse some Alzheimer's, alleviate some of those symptoms. But the reason Satan ars even when you move away from your religious upbringings, those things still have a hold on you. So I was bought up a sik. um I don't consider my seek anymore consider myself to be seek anymore because I don't follow those rules but there are lots of the teachings that are just ingrained within me sat nama when I heard that it's like That sounds so much like satnam um and so I went digging around satnam is basically the second word that is used in the seek holy book the gurug

[00:04:31] Jacob: Gransai satna mom. So I dug around to it and I found out that this research was carried out by a guy who is sick. He started it. It's not he didn't do all the research. As I said, the research is very solid. He's got lots of um great professionals, academics, uh

[00:04:52] Ravinder: Professors working on it. Um so it is very solid but he is a seek and what I found was some of these explanations that were given to the background. So what is advert what was advertised widely was that sata nama meant um

[00:05:10] Jacob: Something like birth life death rebirth

[00:05:14] Ravinder: Something like that and that's not what it means but I questioned myself I'm not a seek ac I'm not an academic in seeks I was brought up that way that doesn't mean I know all the theory behind it so I went around and I dug through all the

[00:05:29] Jacob: Information and I realized those explanations the research was solid but the explanations weren't. So that's what really triggered me. It's like, okay, what makes this meditation work? It's not to do with mudras. It's not to do with hand positions. It's not to do with

[00:05:47] Ravinder: Imaging, but it is to do with slowing down brain wave activity. when you repeat sama you know and you just repeat that over and over again and it's a nice slow pace and you're breathing um more

[00:06:03] Jacob: Easily more slowly and you slow down all

[00:06:06] Ravinder: That activity when you bring in the mudras which is touching the different fingers for the different words well it's not the mudras necessarily that are creating the effect it's a focus have you ever tried trying to make your mind blank. It's impossible. As soon as I sit down to meditate, if I think, okay, I'm just going to make my mind blank. No, everything is going to flood through. So, when you look at the elements in this meditation, that is what got my attention more. Often times things are

[00:06:46] Jacob: Simplified or mystified. you know, they

[00:06:49] Ravinder: Make it mystical and magical and it doesn't need to be. So, that's really what triggered me was I came across this. I didn't like the explanations. Quite honestly, I found some of them offensive. It's like don't distort it. It's not even you there was an explanation they gave where they said that it was to do with um the pressure points inside your mouth the tongue and where it hits in your mouth but sat nama is not sat nam it's not s it's not t it's t

[00:07:27] Jacob: Your mouth is totally different so when you're looking at acupressure points that's ridiculous but the research was still solid. And so as I started digging into this and I started looking at all the other things that we do, it was me searching for what is it that really works? Take out the mystical, the magical, take out the teachers, the

[00:07:51] Ravinder: Gurus that tell you to do things in certain ways. I wanted to empower the reader. I wanted to give them the information. And so when I take this particular meditation apart in the book, I provide ways that you can personalize it and make it your own. There is a great value to faith. So whatever you your background is, if you can incorporate that, fine. If you don't want to, that's fine. But I wanted to make it work for you. I don't want to create resistance in you to the actual process. I want you to understand it, personalize it and fly with it. And I took that through, you know, all the elements in the book, all the all the research that is in the book. I try to dig in deeper to find out what the truth is. Yeah. Yeah. And you definitely you laid a great scientific framework for everything and you brought in a lot of relatable stories. Um my attention was I

[00:08:48] Jacob: Had no problems with my attention as I was listening to your book. Um, so I converted over to audio and was listening this morning as I was reading along. Um, so how does it coincide with

[00:08:59] Ravinder: Your personal heal healing journey? So how much of this was as you're learning? I mean some something I definitely want to learn about is uh you healed your own rheumatoid arthritis. Um, you stumbled upon a couple supplements. I definitely want to hear about all that. So, how did that lead into as you're learning about yourself and you're also learning about all this other framework that you have, this other background from you and your husband's work? Um, how does it all start leading in together? Life is a journey. There isn't, you know, just one element to this. Yeah. The whole thing has been me um not only trying to become the best version of myself. We were talking about that earlier on. um but dealing with issues that I had as well. So there have been several places where I have used all these techniques. It actually started from that. Um my degrees in microbiology. I worked in a path lab. One day there was a lecturer that w that

[00:09:59] Jacob: Came around and this was advertised to all the doctors and nurses and lab staff at the hospital. I had always thought hypnosis was something people did on the stage. It was rather silly. You do it for a laugh. Didn't take it seriously at all. But here was a presentation being funded by

[00:10:19] Ravinder: The hospital. So it had a quasi endorsement to it on hypnosis and psychotherapy. So I attended this um I knew for a fact during the actual presentation that these weren't shills because coincidentally it was a huge auditorium. Coincidentally there were about 70 people in my lab who attended this seminar but they were distributed throughout the lab and when he called up subjects coincidentally he chose three people from my lab. So I knew they weren't shills. There were stories he told. There was one particular story. I repeat this one a lot cuz it just it grabbed my attention. But there was a woman who had a pain in her arm. She'd had a pain in her arm for decades. She had seen all the doctors, all the specialists. They hadn't been able to find anything. As a last resort, she went for hypnosis. And under hypnosis, they did the regression. They go back to the triggering event. And she discovered there was an emotional event. Something had upset her in the past that she had packed away in a box. Didn't think it was significant, but that was the event that she remembered. The following day, she called the hypnotherapist and said the pain had gone. It had actually gone immediately, but she didn't trust it. So, she had waited to see and this pain had gone. And I was fascinated by the idea that the subconscious mind can have such an effect on our present from events that we've forgotten about, discarded. Um, it intrigued me. It intrigued me. So, I went I had hypnotherapy myself. I discovered some fascinating techniques. I uh did hypnotic drawing, hypnotic writing. With the hypnotic drawing, they go back to the traumatic event. And so the hypnotherapist had me do this drawing and I'm a really bad artist at the best of times and at the end of the session I looked down at my piece of art and it was just squiggles on a page and I didn't have any idea what any of that meant. Then the following week he brought me back and told me to go back to this and look at the picture and tell him what it meant. Under hypnosis I knew exactly. There was an event when I was in school. I would have been eight, nine, maybe 10. Um, we there was a swimming pool at Esswall, just an above ground pool and in the summer we would go swimming. It wasn't proper swimming lessons. It was just us kids splashing around. But there was one day I was in the pool and I have no idea why, but my feet couldn't find purchase on the ground. I could not get my feet under me. My head was underwater. I'm floundering away. It wasn't deep, you know. Um, if I could stand up easy. Norm, I just could not stand up. A teacher saw my difficulty, reached in, pulled me up by my swimming cap. Everything was fine. But I didn't tell anybody how afraid I was. I didn't admit it to myself that, you know, I came close to drowning in a, you know, with a

[00:13:34] Jacob: Whole group of people around me. But

[00:13:38] Ravinder: Under hypnosis, this trauma was unlocked and it opened up parts of me. So that's, you know, that was where my healing journey started. I went on and did a three-year course in hypnosis and psychotherapy. Um, I then met my husband and as said, he's an expert in the uh preconscious processing field. So he's got the patented inner talk subliminal technology. um I met him and I have been working in the background with him doing the research. So with the RA after my second

[00:14:17] Jacob: Child was born I developed RA. I started

[00:14:21] Ravinder: Having random joint pains. It just got worse and worse. By the time my son was 3 months old, I was having problems changing his diaper because the pain in my shoulder could be so bad. I couldn't hold his legs up to put the diaper underneath and that's really scary for a new mom. So then I incorporated everything I had learned. Um we have this idea that now I want I want everyone to be cautious with how you take this information. This is not about casting blame of any kind. But if you try just as an experiment to take full responsibility for everything that goes on in your life, it can open up avenues of opportunities. It can open up things that you haven't thought to look at. So I developed the RA and I searched within myself. The beauty of this is that you can do it. You don't have to share the information. You don't have to embarrass yourself by telling everyone, you know, all of these crazy things that you've done. And lots of the ideas that come up may not be correct anyway. But I went through this

[00:15:34] Jacob: The process and I thought, why am I doing this to myself? What benefit do I get from being sick? What is it that I

[00:15:43] Ravinder: Am trying to avoid? Why am I trying to

[00:15:47] Jacob: Punish myself with this? So I did I did all of that work. Some of the ideas were nuts. Some of them maybe could be true. I don't know. So I did all of that. I

[00:16:00] Ravinder: Also am fascinated by the placebo response. Our minds have great healing ability and there is so much research there as well. So, I don't know about how you turn on the placebo effect, but I do know how to turn off those things that can block us from healing ourselves. So, if we believe that everything is out there, things happen to us, there's nothing we can do about it. Um, sometimes you get sick and that's all there is to it. I didn't want to go down that avenue. I wanted to say my mind knows how to heal this. All I have to do is believe it enough. So I used we have an inner talk subliminal program accelerated healing and well-being. I played that program every night all night for 15

[00:16:53] Jacob: Months. So what I'm doing is just trying to program as deeply as possible this idea that my mind knows how to heal me. I allow that to happen. Um I can do this. I take away the blocks that say I can't do this and I replace it with I can do this. 15 months in, you know, I looked at alternative therapies. I didn't want stuff that just helped. I wanted to cure myself of this. I wanted it gone. Absolutely. 15 months in, I came across a supplement CMO. It's freely available today on Amazon. It was just coming out then. the developer of this, the scientist behind it all, Dr. Sans was alive still at the time and I contacted his office to make sure there were no contraindications with nursing my child at the same time. I took this

[00:17:49] Ravinder: Supplement, two tablets twice a day for two weeks and basically the RA went. Now, I had tried to come off my RA meds before that and it was not pretty. You know, I could have these big flare ups. My joints would, you know, ping and get stuck in the wrong places. The pains would come back. I was unable prior to this to come off the doctor uh doctor prescribed medications. But then I took the CMO for two weeks. um came off my meds a week after I had a pain in my shoulder. I went back to the meds morning, night, and morning. Following week, the pain came back. I took the meds twice. Following week, the pain came back. I took the meds once. I've not taken any RA meds for 25 years now. None at all.

[00:18:45] Jacob: No, no prescription meds either. Nope.

[00:18:48] Ravinder: Nothing. Nothing at all. Wow. I don't

[00:18:52] Jacob: Know, Jacob, what actually healed me. Um, when it comes to healing ourselves and personal development, sometimes you don't have to know which element it was

[00:19:06] Ravinder: That worked. I just know perhaps the CMO if it was such a cure for RA, it would be curing everybody and it's not. Yeah. But it worked for me. Um, is it that my particular RA responded well to that? Is it that I had done all the other work and I just needed this placebo response to kick in? I needed to put it on something else. Yeah. Yeah. All I know

[00:19:34] Jacob: Is that it worked. And so, yeah, this was a significant issue to me. I will try everything in my power to get it to work. I think it was a combination. I actually think it was a combination. I programmed myself to fully believe I could heal myself. Um, I did the

[00:19:55] Ravinder: Background work to say, is it this or is it that I'm gaining from getting sick? I did all of that work and then I allowed the placebo to kick in. I don't know, but it worked. I do think there is some sort of it's like an accumulatory ripening of sorts. I'm in I'm picturing a bucket being filled with water that has a you know a tipping point at the middle to when it gets filled it finally tips over and all the water dumps out. So once it gets to the top it's now counterbalanced to tip over. I think there's something about that when it when it comes to our healing. I talked to a couple people on the podcast that they have found some sort of supplement that seemed to have kind of pushed them over and they could mark that looking back as kind of when it really turned off or turned on something and it was a huge part of their journey. It's very interesting. There's something to that, right? There is definitely a tipping point. That's a great way to put it. You do all of this work and then suddenly you can have a breakthrough that seems magical,

[00:20:58] Jacob: But it's not. is the accumulated effect.

[00:21:01] Ravinder: And that's something else that you see in mind training. We look at the accumulated effect like of optimism. Um

[00:21:09] Jacob: How that being optimistic today can have

[00:21:12] Ravinder: Farreaching ramifications to longevity, health, prosperity, relationships. But it does it all adds up. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Well, tell me more about optimism. Tell me about the positive benefits of optimism. And uh one of my notes that I wanted to throw in there is can you feature something for the people who have trouble even like they just go I am just a negative person. I'm just I just have trouble with that. My first response is always kind of negative. How do I bust out of that? So uh give a give a gift to those people as well please. There is so

[00:21:50] Jacob: Much research on the benefits of

[00:21:54] Ravinder: Positivity and optimism. There are there are research studies that show the shortterm kinds of effects. So they have people maybe they're writing in journals and they're told to think of something positive and they look at these same people just 6 weeks afterwards and they can find alleviations from anxiety and stress to long-term ones where they can look, you know, 40, 50, 60 years down the highway and show there was one research study that I looked at. they were looking at nuns. For some reason, they often look at nuns, and I think it may be because you've got this um controlled group of people with the ability to go back and look at the people again um long term. But in this particular research study, they the nuns were asked to keep journals um and then they would analyze the journals and mark them to degrees of optimism and positivity. And what

[00:22:55] Jacob: They found was those nuns who in their

[00:22:59] Ravinder: 20s had gone on uh who had just expressed themselves more positively when they were older, they would live longer. They would live longer, they would live happier. Um, one of the other things that really fascinated me was when they did autopsies afterwards as well on these nuns, they could find nuns whose brains were riddled with Alzheimer's, but they never expressed it. They never expressed it at all. And I found that really encouraging because I'm in I'm in my 60s now. And so I start, you know, those you could have some of those fears. It's like I don't fear dying. I don't fear lots of these other things. But to lose myself in dementia or Alzheimer's is significant. So it shows there the more engaged you are with life, the more you can put this stuff aside. And you know with optimism they showed there's a longitudinal nurses study that was done and they showed that the more optimistic nurses had significantly less chances of dying from loads of diseases. So they could have like a 16% lower chance of dying from cancer or a 52% lower chance of dying from infection. That's absolutely huge when it comes to cardiac health. Even if you've got a history, a family history of cardiac disease, the optimistic people were a

[00:24:34] Jacob: Third less likely to deal with cardiac

[00:24:38] Ravinder: Issues even with that kind of

[00:24:42] Jacob: Strong history. So you say, how can you how can you make yourself more optim optimistic if you're not? Very important question there because some people are more pessimistic. Some people are more optimistic. Journaling is a really good thing to do. That's something I would suggest everyone do right now. And it doesn't have to be detailed journaling. I think at the end of the day, one of the things I like to do, as I said, I always combine all of these techniques. I'm into saving time a lot. So, I will combine techniques. So when I will when I go to bed, I get into bed, I will do

[00:25:25] Ravinder: Some a bit of slow breathing. I do the diaphragmatic breathing. We can talk about that more in detail, but that is just a process where it will automatically help your brain produce some of the happy brain chemicals. It can uh relieve anxiety and stress. It's a very mechanical process. So I can be in bed. I will do maybe three. That's all. It's not huge. I'm not going to hyperventilate or anything, but I do a few deep, slow breaths, allowing my diaphragm to expand. I'll do the forgiveness exercise

[00:26:03] Jacob: Where I think about any anyone that may

[00:26:06] Ravinder: Have upset me and put out forgiveness.

[00:26:10] Jacob: There is great release that comes from forgiving other people. and also for forgiving myself. We make mistakes in life. We do things. We can say things impulsively. It's important to forgive ourselves and to allow others to forgive us as well. But I do the forgiveness and then I'll do the gratitude. I will stop. And so I'm not actively journaling. I'm not writing it down. Both processes are good. Whatever works for you. But I will stop and think of what am I grateful for today? And sometimes it can be something

[00:26:46] Ravinder: As simple as it was bright and sunny today. I enjoyed seeing the sunshine. I'm grateful for that. I'm grateful for the ability to be able to go out for a walk. I'm grateful for the end of day chats I have with my husband where we unwind, um maybe have a drink together, crack a few jokes. I'm grateful for these things. It can be I'm grateful for my job. I'm grateful I can uh provide for my family. I'm grateful for the food that we've had today. It doesn't have to be huge. But gratitude um taking some time to do that. And then when you know you can take it even further because some people will ruminate on all the things that can possibly go wrong. So now I'm outside of my nighttime exercise. I'm talking about just during the day. If you find yourself ruminating on what could go wrong, first of all, start paying attention. Think about what you're thinking about. Mindfulness, the real mindfulness, not the fad mindfulness, which everyone, you know, really is meditation. I'm talking about really think about what you're thinking about. And if you find your mind going that way, check yourself and say, "Okay, I am sitting here thinking about all the worst possible outcomes that

[00:28:11] Jacob: Could happen. What would happen if I thought about the best possible outcome? What would that look like?" Start painting that picture in your mind. What would the best outcome, you know, perhaps you're afraid of being fired and instead you get a promotion. Imagine it. create it in your mind. Paint that paint that picture for yourself and then do that to different degrees. What if that worst possible outcome doesn't even happen? Is it worth spending all of this time worrying about something that may not happen? If it does, I'll deal with it then. But why waste my time right

[00:28:54] Ravinder: Now? Why not enjoy every moment that I

[00:28:58] Jacob: Have right now? So the pessimist will notoriously ruminate on these bad things. So for that person I would say start asking yourself some different questions. Start looking at it differently. Start imagining a positive outcome. Most of the time you will find out that worst possible thing doesn't ever come to be. Yeah. Really doesn't. You know, the vast majority of the time the worst possible thing is not going to happen. But you have to have experience. You have to start seeing that. So you have to start practicing it right now. Test it out. Test it out for yourself. Do your own scientific experiment or non-scientific experiment and test it out for yourself. Once you start having those experiences, the process gets easier and easier to do. Yeah. Um and then you know if you

[00:29:56] Ravinder: Are very leftrain I would say read that chapter in mind training. The evidence is so deep on the positive aspects the positive benefits you know the chances of getting promoted are greater for optimistic people. Better relationships better prosperity just across the board better health. Um and it feels good. Jacob.

[00:30:24] Jacob: Yeah. It simply feels good. So why not do something that can that can feel good? Yeah. Yeah. Precisely. Well said. It's a I get to these points where cuz I'll be mean to myself and I'm always working on having that gentle relationship, you know. Um it's always it's always a continuous flow. And uh sometimes I'll get to the points where it's just like, man, life is hard enough. I don't need to be so mean to myself. And it that could that alone could be like, "Oh, yeah." And I also love um you know, every time I notice that I'm gentle with myself, every time that I kind of relax a little bit on me, it helps me remember that my problems and my emotions and my feelings aren't special to me. They're something that all humans go through to some degree, and it helps me just feel a little bit more for other people as well. So, it's a it's a reoccurring cycle. Um, okay. I want to glance at my notes and make sure I don't miss anything super important. Um, so how do we what about what do you think about the jump from even learning that you the jump

[00:31:32] Ravinder: From fixed mindset to growth mindset basically? Because I think that can be pretty profound for a lot of people. a lot of people at the beginning of uh you know a lot of later in life when we kind of go oh I need to redirect and I need to look at my childhood traumas I need to look at how the things that happened to me when I was younger reshaped me um but to even get to that point you kind of have to convince yourself or hear at least hear other people's examples of um the fact that we could even change that we're not just born a certain way and everything not everything's determined. So what do you think about that initial jump to even knowing that you can develop a growth mindset? That's a complicated question, Jacob. Um, one of the things that I have found in this field is that there are many people who have the attitude of I'm just the way I am. I'm the way God made me, nature made me, genes made me, circumstances made me. I can't change anything. So the very first step in change is understanding that you can change and for some people they're not there yet. So this

[00:32:40] Jacob: For me the spiritual aspect I find my training is very science-based. I wanted to keep it 100% science-based but I often find spirituality creeping out in different places. So I read Robert Sapolski's determined book and he does a

[00:33:00] Ravinder: Really thorough job at explaining why free will does not exist. Every event has a precursor to it. Maybe it's your genes, a prior experience, something else there. So to me the spiritual aspect of this I mean he's absolutely correct. Free will he says free will does not exist.

[00:33:24] Jacob: Period. And many experts say the same thing. That's not quite where I land. I land on the fact that free will isn't free. You have to take you have to take the free will. There are places where you where you can access that. There is work that has been done. Um Benjamin Libert in the 80s looked at uh

[00:33:48] Ravinder: The brain and they look and they find there's activity in the subconscious mind before you make a choice. So he did the first experiment. There were several other experiments done after that. Basically they're asking people to choose whether they're going to press a button with their right hand or their left hand. Something really simple. and the subject says when they made the choice, but a technician looking at, you know, um looking at the equipment can predict up to 7 seconds prior the choice that you're going to make. So the subconscious mind holds all of this information. It's making those choices automatically. You know, you look at Canaman's work, the thinking fast and slow, the system one, system two thinking. We think on automatic pilot most of the time but we can change that and access

[00:34:42] Jacob: More of the system 2 kind of thinking. So when you talk about free will not being free you start saying

[00:34:50] Ravinder: Okay well I can take charge of how my subconscious mind is programmed. So just like the optimism and pessimism, the pessimistic person automatically is going to think the negative thoughts but you take conscious control over that over that and you start changing the programming in your subconscious mind. You look at how it gets programmed in the first place. They often say that you are um the best of the six people closest to you. you'll be as successful as those people. Or when it comes to losing weight, your success will depend

[00:35:27] Jacob: On the people that you surround yourself with. Or when it's relationships, if the girls are together and they're all complaining about their husbands, you're going to find things to complain about with your spouse. You know, you have to

[00:35:40] Ravinder: Look at all of these things. These things are going into your subconscious mind. But the beauty for me in the in the free will argument isn't so much as

[00:35:52] Jacob: Changing somebody else. Some pe people have to get to that point where they see the change. But you can be part of somebody else's experience. If you have discovered if anyone listening to your podcast is aware we have these abilities. They have they already have the awareness that there are things they can do. That's why they're tuning in because they want to learn more of these kinds of techniques. They want to become the best version of themselves. But as they change themselves, they become part of somebody else's experience. So you can have your circle of people and perhaps you all thought first of all that you are just the way that you are. You haven't even thought about self-help. Self-help gets a really bad rap. So there are lots of fields where it's not cool. It's not cool. You're dumb to believe in this kind of stuff. Um but when you start making the

[00:36:50] Ravinder: Change, then the people around you see that change and they say, "Hey, maybe there is something to this." And maybe that's where you got the idea cuz you saw what somebody else could do and you say, "If they can do it, I can do it, too." So actively changing the mindset to come right back to the root of your question. You know that is challenging. Some things are going to happen with time. I would say to your entire audience, I say this, you know, to everybody. Be the change that you want to see in the world. You know, the more you change yourself, the more you improve yourself, the more the happier you are, the happier you will make everyone else. And they will get to see that change is possible, too. Yeah. Yeah. Well, well said. I think there's definitely uh it's a beautiful art to learn as you grow and experience things that not so much your natural state is so much who you are. It's kind of like you can have these comfortable, safe positions of you wake up and maybe your first thoughts are something from the dream world, you're stressed about something immediately, whatever work, but you can choose to input more thoughts. You could you could turn on something that's positive. you could have an action um and it can you know within 20 minutes you can kind of flip the script of whatever your mind might have been telling you when you first woke up and you discover that who you are is um it was strange timing you discover that who you are is the action the person who does the action you know not so much the natural state of immediately when you wake up whatever your first thoughts are a lot of times you discover that who you are is the person who is on the other side of doing something you know it's the importance of action. So, um, on the importance of action, what more can you tell me about the daily routine? Cuz I feel like what it has to happen is, you know, we insert these things and we're like, it's 10 minutes on my mindful minutes, you know, and then I got five minutes on my journaling and then I got breath work for, you know, I think we start out a little precise or at least me when I first started with a lot of this, that's how I began and now it's just a natural fluid part of my movement in the morning. I wake up with enough time to do these certain list of things and it's not even a list anymore. It's just a natural way of me landing back. Um I had a friend to say uh dethawing. Um it's a bit like that.

[00:39:21] Jacob: So what can you tell me about the art of uh kind of making this a daily routine?

[00:39:26] Ravinder: That's totally what mind training is about. I'm not into um spending vast amount of times doing I don't have time, you know. I've raised a family. I've got the business. I've got a busy

[00:39:41] Jacob: Lifestyle. So, what I want to do is create things that can just become habits. And as you said, first of all, you start off doing things very consciously. You're going to make an effort to do some of these things. But I want these things to start becoming habit. So, they're just normal. So, you say in the morning, you open your eyes first thing in the morning. Sometimes we get out of bed the wrong side. It's just it's just the way that is. And you can say, "I just got out of bed the wrong side and that's going to affect my whole day, blah." Um, and you can just succumb to that. Or you can say, "I got out of bed the wrong side, but I can change this." And there are things that you can do. There are morning habits. Um, so just starting off by saying thank you, you know, gratitude for the day. Um, telling yourself you're look thinking about what you're looking forward to in that day. That could be a great way. But there are really simple things like smiling. You know, you get out of bed the wrong side, you're feeling grump grumpy. Um, but smiling the very people often think that when you're happy, you smile. But it works the other way around, too. When you smile, your brain will produce the happy brain chemicals.

[00:41:01] Ravinder: So, smiling will make you happy. So, if you get out of bed and you're grumpy, smile at yourself. Look in the mirror. An exercise I like to do, I don't only just do this in the morning. I will do this throughout the day as well, but I will add a little mindfulness just into how I wash my hands. So, it doesn't take any time. You're washing your hands anyway, but just spare a couple of seconds thought to the feel of the water over your hands, the lather, how soft it feels.

[00:41:33] Jacob: You know, you wash your hand, you can have gratitude that the water is warm. Then look up in the mirror and smile at yourself. I'm very much an advocate of being kind to yourself. Be nice to yourself. So, smile at yourself and say, "You've got this, Ravinder. You can do this. It's okay." Um, make it make it a great day. Talk to yourself. Split seconds. That's all these things take. Just a few seconds. If you can try and get sunlight first thing in the morning. Again, that is going to produce happy brain, happy brain chemicals, the endorphin, the serotonin. If you can step outside, feel the feel the fresh air, you know, these things. It can just be where I am, we've actually got our office building and my home, they are 2-minute walk from each

[00:42:28] Ravinder: Other. So, it's that twominute walk from my home to my office and I can

[00:42:36] Jacob: Breathe the air, breathe the fresh air. If it's just rain, it have that special smell. But I take the seconds to notice that, to absorb that, to feel the awe, to feel to hear the birds singing, to

[00:42:50] Ravinder: Feel the breeze on my face. These

[00:42:54] Jacob: Things don't take vast amounts of time. If you're having a bad time during the day, get up from your desk. Step

[00:43:03] Ravinder: Outside. If it's too cold, stand inside. I will do that. Here in Spokan, the winters can be so, so cold, but we can still get lots of sunshine. So, I will

[00:43:14] Jacob: Go stand by the window. I'm inside. It's nice and warm, but I've got the sun streaming on my face. And I'll do that just for a few moments. You know, it's all a two-way street. Nothing is difficult but in my training at the end of each chapter I go through because there is a great deal of science there and I think the science is important to convince you that the work is necessary to do but I will include a summary at the end of each chapter to tell you why the information was important but then I give you exercises that you can do to start incorporating and first of all they are exercises the things that you do, but after a while they become habit. They absolutely become habit. And you're right, I don't think about most of these things. Most of the time, occasionally, if I'm having a rough day, I will deliberately go do something to get myself out of it, but most of the time I'm doing it automatically. Yeah.

[00:44:18] Ravinder: Yeah. I think that's how it gets. I was just thinking even how I normally do. there was a period of time for every podcast because I would get myself all worked up about the importance of the podcast and I got to make sure my mind is the sharpest and all these things you know and uh so I would have these just structure I got to go to yoga class in the morning and I got to make sure I do this meditation or whatever and um now it's just what whatever I need that day right you know I just structure my day for whatever feels the most intuitive that day and uh about 5 minutes before I sat down here to chat with you I was kind of laying on my uh my foam roller there just stretching out my posture and I started going over my gratitude. Thank you for this. Thank you for this. Ah, what a joy it is to be able to have this opportunity. Wow. Like this lighting looks really cool. I spent a few minutes on it. I'm glad that I got the right lighting. You know, just simple things that uh help me. For me, I call it landing back in my body. And it just helps me pull in all these crazy creative long expanded thoughts that um are fun and useful when they're useful, but they're not always useful. So, um, yeah, it helps me just land back in my body and it shows, Jacob. I can see that on your face, you know. I can see that inner happiness,

[00:45:32] Jacob: Inner contentment, the empower. Yeah. I used to be phobic about public speaking. Absolutely phobic. When I started doing these interviews, just like you, I would do all the prep and all the all of the other stuff. Um, with

[00:45:49] Ravinder: Time you just gain confidence in

[00:45:52] Jacob: Yourself and I instead of focusing on all the science I want to remember all the names and the dates and the, you know, trying to sound impressive, I want to keep it real. And so I gain a lot from these interviews because I'm talking to real people and we're on this path together and it feels good. Yeah. It simply it simply feels good to be in this circle of

[00:46:20] Ravinder: People just doing this. It's real. It's real. It's not it's not all theoretical. It's not about being the most successful, being the most prosperous. It's about being the best version of myself and actualizing myself. I want to be myself. I don't want to be a carbon copy of other people. I don't want to comp compete with other people. Um that's not what life is about. I want to fully blossom into the into the whole me. The whole me and what is me, not as I said what we are programmed

[00:47:00] Jacob: To think. And we are we are programmed. There is stuff going on. Um there is research going on around the world trying to discover why we do what we do.

[00:47:11] Ravinder: I'll ask you, Jacob. Who do you think uses that information the most? The media. The media. Everybody in our magic rectangle we call our phone. That's who uses it. The politicians. You know, we even heard that President Obama had his dream team of social psychologists. President Trump had Cambridge Analytica. They're all using this information. They're going to try and tweak you. They're going to find the words, the trigger points, all of these things, all the ads that you see, they're all trying to reach you on an automatic level. So, learning some of these processes, you don't need to know all of them. You just need to know that they exist and they're going on. Just that just that amount will give you pause for thought. So, in my training, I do go through the compliance principles, things that they do to try and get you to buy their product. One of the ads that it just it's always got my attention because you see the same theme play over and over again where in the ad someone hears about this amazing new product that they've got to have and they start to run to the store to get it and then somebody else sees them running so they have to run too. And soon there's this whole sea of people running, you know. Well, they are using compliance principles there. They've got social proof. If everybody else wants it, it has to be good. They've got the scarcity. Look at all these people going to get it. I better go get mine right now. They're trying to get you to move right now. And the fact is, we don't always need to upgrade our phones as soon as a new version comes out. Our phones can work, you know, really well. My last phone, I'd had it for eight years before I changed it. Eight, maybe longer than that, you know, you don't need these things. But these techniques are being used on you. Yeah. Being used on you constantly. And having an awareness of it gives you the ability to make your own choices. You're not being driven by fears of different

[00:49:27] Jacob: Kinds. You can make a choice based on what you want. Yeah. Yeah. It definitely drives um I was hearing like a fear of incompleteness. It definitely like magnifies this feeling that we could all be prone to. And it really tells you like, well, I'll feed that incompleteness if you just come over here, check out this bright, flashy thing, come listen to this, come think this way. Um and yeah, yeah, they can use it against us. They can it could be a very kind of a whole process really that may take a while when you kind of first discover that oh you know the word propaganda is much more deep than I thought and maybe some of my maybe I should second guess a lot of the things that I thought were for sure or that I learned when I was growing up or from certain textbooks whatever it is um it turn it turns you onto the path of self-discovery for sure and that's something I was thinking about with your book I feel like uh you use the word self-actualiz or use actualization at least Um, and I was thinking your book certainly is, you mentioned the psychocybernetics.

[00:50:26] Ravinder: I remember reading that one as well. That was a mind-blower. But, um, you're kind of guiding people towards their own path of self-actualization. Do you think about it intentionally that way or um, yeah, you certainly are. Yeah, it's great. The subtitle of the book is the science of self-empowerment. Um, maybe I've become cynical to a degree. I get tired of

[00:50:51] Jacob: People telling me the right things to do. There are lots of experts, okay?

[00:50:56] Ravinder: So, you go two ways. You get the

[00:51:00] Jacob: The scientists doing all of their research. Um, and there are some fabulous books out there, but the books rarely ever tell you how to put the stuff into practice. There are lots of self-help books out there, and they will tell you what to do, but they don't tell you why. And often times the information is simply incomplete. So and then they tell you like manifesting you know for a period

[00:51:27] Ravinder: That secret was really popular. Everyone thought ask believe receive all I have to do is do this. And I had literally I talked to people constantly and I remember having someone call me up and they wanted a program to help them with sales but they were a strong believer in manifesting. Um, and so they wanted a program, but they didn't want to play the program. I said, "We have the inner talk subliminal programs, but they didn't want to even play it for an hour a day. They didn't have that much time. They wanted a program that they could just play, and

[00:52:04] Jacob: They wanted it to magnetically bring sales to them. They didn't want to do anything to promote sales. They didn't want to go find new customers. They I promise you they wanted to sit there manifest and have the phone just ring.

[00:52:22] Ravinder: Well, that's how it works, right? No, but there but it got it got hyped up so much. There are people that believe that and that stuff is dangerous. You know, there is something to be said for what you expect you get because that's what you pay attention to. That's where your attention goes to when you start expecting these things. That's what you see. Like if you're going to buy a new car and you've done your research and you've chosen the make, the model, whatever, then all of a sudden that's the car that you see. So there are elements, you know, there are kernels of truth in this.

[00:53:02] Jacob: Um, but I very much believe in putting

[00:53:06] Ravinder: Action behind everything. I want. So often when it comes with manifesting, you get people that teach the law of attraction. There's no such thing as a law of attraction. Um just kernels in there that are worth holding on to. Um but then when it doesn't work, they will tell you that you weren't doing it enough. You weren't believing enough or you were holding on to it. You've got to believe it and then release it cuz as long as you're holding on to it, you haven't believed it yet. They're telling you how you are deficient. And that

[00:53:41] Jacob: Stuff annoyed me. It absolutely annoyed me. And that was why I wanted to throw away all the fluff, all of this kind of stuff. I didn't want a self-help book that says that if it's not working for you, you're not doing it right. I wanted to give you the information to find out for yourself why it's not working for you. I wanted this to be very much a

[00:54:07] Ravinder: Personal process of self-empowerment. Empower yourself. I want to give you all the tools. Now go away and make it your own. Make it your own. Take the elements that work for you. You don't have to do everything. But the fact is you start doing some things, some things work, and then maybe you add something else into your mix, and then you add something else in. You find out what is comfortable for you. But being true to yourself is what this life's journey is all about. Yeah. Yeah. In the healing journey, the self-empowerment journey is certainly one that leads you back to yourself um in a in a in a way that you learn about yourself in a way that you didn't think you were going towards. It's a it's a wonderful path. So, I want to me you mentioned at some point in your book um kind of briefly, but it sparked a curiosity. You mentioned a right of patch uh passage. our um society doesn't really have a right of passage. And I've read this book uh Brian Marescu. It's the secret history of the religion with no name. It's about the eiscinian mysteries and they used to take this urgot and they used to um drink this psychedelic drug and it was basically a I think a male

[00:55:23] Jacob: Thing but a ride of passage for cultures. Um and I wonder what you think about that in our modern age. Do you think that there is some sort of like is there pseudo rights of passage that are taking place that we're desiring? Should we bring back a right of passage? Um I guess what do you think about the modern world and rights of passage? You know, you're right. There aren't rights of passage in the same way. I don't know. That's not something I've given a great deal of thought to. Fact is, we are brought up, you know, our parents, um, teachers, whatever. As children, we're always told what to do, the right thing to do. We're told that we're children, that we, you know, we have to pay attention, pay attention to the adults. And we don't normally have um a way through that. For me, I suppose a ride of passage was when I went away to university. that I think is for me it was one of the easiest ways to grow up. I'm fortunate I went to university of Aberestworth in Wales. Um it's a very isolated kind of place but whenever they're doing polls it has the it's always there either number one or number two for student satisfaction. So my college experience was very different say to my boys college experience. They went to the University of Washington which is huge and it's very impersonal and there's a whole bunch of stress. Me my college experience was amazing and I was in an environment that was very accepting and then I was with people my own age. So we learned to do things for ourselves and it was okay to make mistakes. So university or going away to college can be a right of right of passage.

[00:57:20] Ravinder: Um but that can be a difficult

[00:57:23] Jacob: Thing that goes on. There used to be I don't know that it is so much the case now, but there is this mentality that when you're 18, you're an adult, so you go out and it's like you have this hard line without any of the respect that goes with that. Um, when we talk about the rights of passage for certain cultures, there can often be something that is done like a ceremony, a bar mitzvah, you know, in the in the Jewish faith, there can be, you know, some process that the child feels accepted into the adult world. So, I think that those things could be could be really helpful. Um, when you've got a good support structure, you know, you've got the older generation, uncles, friends,

[00:58:16] Ravinder: Family, those things could be really

[00:58:19] Jacob: Helpful. Um, but they don't really exist now. So, yeah, if you have the ability, if you've got that kind of structure, doing something for your

[00:58:31] Ravinder: Teen as they are becoming young adults. Um, yeah. would be would be helpful. It would give them greater respect, greater selfrespect, greater faith in their in their own abilities so they don't go from a child who has to do what they're told to all of a sudden they're just thrown out in the cold. Having something where the older generation says, "You're here now. You're here now. You're smart. You've grown up. You've learned everything that I can teach you. Now it's for you to go

[00:59:06] Jacob: Out and teach yourself, learn from life, learn what is good, but take the values that we have imparted on you.

[00:59:15] Ravinder: That would be great. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's a Yeah. It's the less of the art of throwing them over overboard of the ship and telling them to swim and more of like giving them some minimal supplies in a raft and sending them in the direction that they want to go in that they're already like whatever they're interested in. You know, give them a push in whatever support that you can and um you know wish them the best. I was just thinking how sweet it would have been how on fire I would have been if when I turned you know 17 18 if I had gone to one of these big Tony Robbins events that they have nowadays. I mean, that would have been crazy. I would I'm sure I would have been fired up. Probably just way too overly confident in an insane way, but that would have been quite the adventure. Um Okay. So, so now that

[01:00:00] Jacob: You've written your book, now that you've compiled it, um where do you see where do you see the next 10 to 15 years to 20 years of not just your work and what you're going to focus on, but kind of the whole world of self-development, psychology? Um, do you think, you know, cuz some of these things are pretty profound. If we could start narrowing in and both narrowing in and expanding on the fact that our thoughts can give us our sickness, quote unquote, or, you know, the process of solving and the process of self-development could cure us, quote unquote. Um, where do you see the future of all this?

[01:00:41] Ravinder: I think for myself going forward, life is about exploring who I am and what I understand. So my interests go, you know, beyond science. They go to the spiritual realms, too. I'm constantly um searching that for what feels real. I don't like easy answers in any area. Um, so for me, I want to continue exploring that, exploring what I what I think I know. Um, not just what sounds

[01:01:14] Jacob: Good, what feels good. Um, when it comes

[01:01:18] Ravinder: To the whole field of self-help, you know, the fact is, Jacob, lots of these ideas get recycled. There's a great deal of stuff. Even the law of attraction isn't, you know, it didn't come out in the 2000s. That's based on earlier work and that's based on earlier work. There are ideas that get re that get recycled and I think the languaging just changes. So I

[01:01:46] Jacob: Suppose I'm not out to make drastic changes in the world. All I want to do is be a positive influence on those people around me and those people that I can interact with. Those people who want to hear it will hear it and it will improve their lives and my spiritual process. This idea of free will be the

[01:02:11] Ravinder: Example. Go out there. I think you know what one of the things I do find interesting is the self-help industry was much more of an industry uh 10 20 years ago. I think you had some of the bigger names and maybe it's a bit like religion when people start to realize, hang on, there's flaws in this.

[01:02:37] Jacob: This isn't this isn't quite correct. And so you have it with self-help. It becomes this huge big craze and then people start seeing flaws in it and it's like no, it's not all about rah, be happy, be positive that you know, you've got to you've got to keep it real. So maybe I again it's not something that I'd really thought about Jacob. So thanks for bringing up the question but I do think there'll be another development. I think people are thinking more and more today. There is a hunger out there to improve ourselves, but people want it realistic. At the younger people, the Gen Z, the millennials, they don't want to be fobbed off with a god in the sky with a white beard who's going to just give them everything. They don't want the secret, this cornucopia of everything is going to be hunky dory. They want real things that they're very discerning. And it's a little bit sad right now because there is a great deal of anxiety and depression in those generations. But I think as I'm talking to you, I think a great deal of positive will come out of that because they're not accepting the status quo. They're questioning. You don't have to do things the same way. And that's how the world the world develops. you start questioning what are the norms and so and so that's a good thing. So yeah, I think in the long run as I said I'm thinking out loud with you Jacob but my answer is changing as I'm speaking to you but I think it'll become more and more realistic and more and more empowering. Yeah, I do I do it. It'll be real. It won't be the rah stuff that becomes silly, you know, five easy ways to explain to karma like no, it doesn't work that way. 10 steps to enlightenment. Yeah, there you go. Like that's not it. But there is a journey and life itself is a journey and when you can enjoy all of it and when you can discover your own places of power within that when you take back control over yourself then it then it's a wonderful journey and you just keep on growing and it's fabulous. Brilliant. Yeah. Well said. I think it's all such a journey back to I can never seem to decouple things from identity. Identity becomes, you know, when you get on to self-development is just who am I? Who do I want to be? Um how do my actions every single day equate to how I see myself? You did a nice job of splitting those into different you explored like the super ego and the ego in the book. Um yeah, it's all fascinating stuff. I think everyone, you know, the younger generation, I work a lot of these um I work live event production. So just sometimes I'm DJ, sometimes director, sometimes I'm just all around um live events. A lot of my work is in these nonprofit um high school leadership conferences. And um man, some of these kids impress me. They really they're so sharp. They uh they're individuals. They um they have they're

[01:06:02] Ravinder: Just they're learning all the time. you know, you just watch and just their brains are just firing. They're learning. They're intuitive. They're so confident, you know. Um, so I'm excited for the future. I'm excited for, you know, their journey of um, you know, it seems like the millennial crowd, we went through this whole like childhood trauma and we're going to heal our childhood trauma and remap what our parents did. That kind of seemed like it was my generation's thing. But, um, I'm looking forward to what the journey looks like for the for the younger generation as well. You know, it's exciting.

[01:06:33] Jacob: Yeah, it is indeed. It is indeed. I

[01:06:36] Ravinder: Think it I think it's amazing. And yeah, when you talk about millennials and going back and healing trauma, you know, there's a time and a place there are some things that you need to go back and look at. And that's where hypnotherapy, psychotherapy can be really beneficial. Um there are things in mind training where I do highlight the different things you're supposed to learn at different ages and how you progress successfully through everything. So that gives you a framework of where to look. Sometimes you don't have to have somebody else. Um you don't have to talk about these things to other people, but you can look at your own life and say, "Oh, that's where my inadequacies and insecurities come from. I see it." when it when you bring it out into the light of day, it can often lose its power. So, there are places that it's worth looking back. And there are other places it's like just forge forward. Just go forward and

[01:07:33] Jacob: Um m make things better going forward. You don't have to be you don't have to be controlled by your past. Yeah. You know, so there's a time and a place for both approaches. Yeah. And I think something that I found for myself that I tried to like make known um when I when I look back and I'm you know kind of giving advice or giving someone else my input um is you don't have to you

[01:07:58] Ravinder: Know clean the entire bottom of the ocean when you're healing your stuff when you're when you're working on your stuff when you're trying to improve certain things. For me, I had a while where I was just like I just took a shovel to everything and I'm like it happened in my childhood. I'm going to dig it up and like you know some people get caught up in trying to solve like the whole lineage that you know all of my ancestors I'm going to heal all of your trauma and you know whatever your path is but um you know be easy on yourself too I think is a very important rule of thumb here. You know I'm sure you'd probably agree on that. Definitely. I'm a strong believer in self-care. Um, I'm a strong

[01:08:34] Jacob: Believer in creating happiness now. Um,

[01:08:38] Ravinder: Doing what we can right now to you take it one step at a time. Some people have these, you know, huge goals. I've literally had people come in with this huge long laundry list of all the things that they want to do. And I always say, it's too big. That's too much. You can't fix everything all at once. But what you find is that if you look at today, what would make me happier today? What would help me feel better about myself today? You just take it one day at a time. And then you will frequently find that when you deal with it that way, some of the other problems just fix themselves. They do. I would tell you that just my own life experience that you can have this big long list but you start doing one or two of them and you'll find the others resolve themselves. So yeah, maybe you want to look backwards sometimes. Maybe you just want to say no what would help me feel better? What would help me feel better right now? How can I reduce my anxiety today?

[01:09:43] Jacob: Step outside and feel the sun on your face. Um and tell yourself that you have the power You know, that's has to be one of the most important things. It's not that I'm unhappy today, so the world is doing it doing it to me or my chemistry is doing it to me. I can change that. I can change it. It may not change everything. I may not, you know, go from depressed to being euphoric in one go, but I can move that scale. I have more control. And the more I do, the more it will work and the better tomorrow will be. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. It's really about not always trying to solve the answer or you know see how the daunting staircase can be so intimidating to you but you can take a step or two today and that is enough and tomorrow however you're feeling you reapproach how much can I get done today cool get it done and then be easy on yourself at the end of the day with how much you did get done it's a journey it's a whole process um okay so we are getting up here in time I um you have given us so many wonderful um There's been so much so many things that people can try, activities, actions that they can take. We already have so many. Um but if I could ask you if you could think of one more that maybe wasn't mentioned or the juiciest fruit um just something that so people are listening right now, whatever day it is, tomorrow they're going to start doing this thing. They're going to do some percentage of this thing. Anything come to mind that we didn't mention? You know, my biggest thing is one that most people don't take seriously at first and that is

[01:11:19] Ravinder: Smiling. Smiling. You don't realize

[01:11:23] Jacob: First stop start paying attention. You know, there are lots of younger kids today who lots of people in general don't smile, but younger kids in general, you know, they don't smile in greeting. You get that head nod. That funky head nod. Yeah. What's that?

[01:11:41] Ravinder: So, start paying attention to smiling.

[01:11:45] Jacob: You'll discover people don't smile as much as you think. But when you smile at someone, you make them feel cared for. You make them feel welcome. You um

[01:11:57] Ravinder: Make them trust you more just smiling.

[01:12:00] Jacob: But smiling for yourself brings on your own happy brain chemicals. It makes you feel better. It reduces your stress levels um long-term results. You know, as I said, you can increase relationship success, whatever. But just for today, so I would say that has to be the first thing. Pay attention to how much you smile. Ask your partner, ask your friends around you how much you smile. And then go out of your way to be nice to people. And that doesn't mean, you know, give them all the cash in your wallet, anything like that. Smile at them. People want to be appreciated. They want to be liked. Everyone has their insecurities. All of these fears, we all have this. Um, if you get outside of

[01:12:51] Outro: Yourself and realize that if you're feeling insecure, other people are feeling insecure. And if you can make them feel more secure, then that is all part of a of a two-way street. And that again comes down to the beauty of life, the journey itself. So yeah, it sounds really small. I would recommend everyone read mind training to understand why smiling is so important. Um I we cannot Do it justice in an interview like this. There is so much there. But yeah, that's a huge key. smile. Yeah, I love that one. I uh I try to as much as I'm actually a pretty natural introvert, but I go on walks this path by my house is so wonderful. But uh it's one of my favorite things to try to do is look up, get out of my own head, whatever headphones I'm listening to, smile at people. A lot of times it's like, "Oh, I feel better. I think they probably feel better." It's great. I smile at the dogs, too. That's always just a positive for everyone. It is. There's another really good one there is to do with hugs. and they were talking about um the oxytocin that gets released when you give someone a hug. When that person wants to be hugged, but a beautiful part of it is it works for your dogs, too. So, you know, if you're feeling down, go hug your dog. Go hug your dog. You're gonna you're going to feel better. Um yeah, if you're passing people on the street, smile at them. It feels good when people smile back. And if you smile, smiling's infectious. Be part of the change. Enjoy it all. Yeah, it absolutely is. And you know, they always say if you can get out of your own head and think of someone else. If you can serve someone else, you can stop thinking about yourself and then you're not depressed anymore. If you're depressed, you're thinking about yourself. You can almost guarantee it. So, um, yeah, that's also wonderful. Thank you so much for your time. Thank you for this. Um, make sure we send everybody I'll have the links below and all that, but send everybody to your book. Where do we find more on you? Um, tell me about your social media, all of that. You can find the book Mind Training the Science of Self-Empowerment wherever books are sold, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, whatever country you're in. The big bookstores are going to have it. And if they don't have it in stock, they can order it in. You can visit my website, which is simply raindataylor.com. So that's R A V for Victor, I N D for dog, erinder, rainda.com. If you read my training, if you've just had value from this interview and you have some feedback, I would love to hear from you. And you can email me directly at rainda ravindaaylor.com. Um, social networking, I'm on Facebook and Instagram. I'm doing a bit more LinkedIn. I'm doing more. I'm getting there. But Facebook and Instagram are going to be my primary places. And I would I would love to interact with you. It's a journey. it's fun. Let's do this together and um enjoy it all. Yeah. Brilliant. Well, yeah. Hopefully some of the listeners uh um check you out. I think they'll enjoy it very much. You got my five star review. I've got a little bit more left of the book, but I've read a good portion of it and I'm enjoying it. I can't wait to finish. So, you got my sign off on that for sure. Um Jacob. Yeah. Well, well, thanks again so much for your time. Um listeners, you know the drill. What do I say every time? Have you stretched today? Move your body a little bit. Drink a little bit of water. If you drank no water today, what are you doing, man? Drink some water. Stretch. Love yourself. And uh check out the guest book. You're going to love it.

[01:12:51] Jacob: All right, I'm going to stop this recording here.

[01:12:52] Ravinder: Wonderful. Well, hey, thanks. That was great.

[01:13:17] Outro: Knowledge is power. Reality Is Junkyard Love podcast.