Episode 005 with Jaycie Randall

[00:00:00] Jacob: You know what is that like it seems like a lot of our age group people are changing people are growing up have you

[00:00:07] Jaycie: Noticed that ya know it's super I don't know so much is changing but I feel like so for so long like generations prior I've just kind of like molded sorry to like we're why where we

[00:00:23] Jacob: Were at and I feel like amongst our friend group like we're just trying to make something different happen a different outcome like more happiness and less like structure and like that's

[00:00:36] Jaycie: My personal opinion on that we're growing up but we're seeing that we're like not growing up happy so we're like alright we need to be writing up happy and like in love with life and in love with what we're doing yeah totally I feel that too it's kind of it's it is growing up you

[00:00:52] Jacob: Know but it's I don't want you know old

[00:00:54] Jaycie: People to be like all finally these kids are growing up it's I think what it is great see we chill out my mom's got us in here just literally just having a ball with himself he's just he's having a fight with somebody yep there he goes I wonder if it's on the I bet you that this one is recording it so when we're trying to have a serious conversation about hilarious all

[00:01:22] Jacob: Right we're gonna keep going so it seems like our you know our age group we grew up with technology like it was just growing up just doesn't mean the same thing as it does for our parents age like we're like when they turn 18 19 it was that's when they grew up so to say or yeah it's like okay let's start doing what we need to do which is you don't

[00:01:46] Jaycie: Think it fends get a house 401k all

[00:01:48] Jacob: These things that's a huge generalization but it seems like argh our group is finally realizing okay so that doesn't work for us and we know that we know that we're not happy doing what our parents have done there's a lot more opportunity seems like we can kind of know more broader subjects and we're

[00:02:06] Jaycie: Finally able to figure out what our

[00:02:09] Jacob: Growing up I guess is I suppose like how do we grow out of this exciting technology like this is

[00:02:16] Jaycie: Who we are this little subculture yeah

[00:02:24] Jacob: It's like cool that we can differentiate like different eras like you know like

[00:02:31] Jaycie: We're at this point where like I don't

[00:02:34] Jacob: Know like for myself personally but like I'm not you know holding anything against like what has created the life that we have now better like more so trying to just do better for what is yet to come I thought make sense so it's cool that way like or really about it no no it's totally fine it seems like as we get jamming more we'll just be able to just kick it off it's funny I noticed when I'm talking on the podcast I feel like I stop myself and I want my long rambling thoughts a little bit more cuz I'm like oh yeah people are listening to be talking I'm probably not talking about **** you know but it's funny it's just we're just talking you know it's funny that we have that little self-conscious like how I'm not good at saying what I need to say it's so silly

[00:03:25] Jaycie: But yeah luckily I feel like if there's

[00:03:28] Jacob: Some listeners that are gonna understand you know in listen how's word you know as we're talking and trying to explain ourselves I feel like these are different the listeners that'll do so hopefully if not **** you man if you listening **** you in your car I'm gonna turn that up to just like super loud to some full cool that's funny I wonder if I overloaded the amp this is a new loom so you can hear me

[00:04:00] Jaycie: Now yeah I'm just it just reflux so what happened is as I

[00:04:10] Jacob: Was just going to **** you into my mic my new little Amazon headphone port

[00:04:15] Jaycie: Thing overloaded itself but yes for real um yeah but so JC I'm really happy to have you on here and have just like real

[00:04:28] Jacob: Conversations that anybody's

[00:04:31] Jaycie: Listening can have value from we've known each other for quite a while I mean do you remember how we met at all I have like I don't remember just through friends maybe I want to say probably at a party at your house maybe dire that's

[00:04:50] Jacob: Right what is it I started coming because I'm from you know around this

[00:05:00] Jaycie: Area and I started like partying super young so like a team that came into the coasts of Longview scene right which was

[00:05:11] Jacob: Like new culture to me from living out in the woods - yeah you know 30 people at least you through that you know just meeting I think through Zack specifically cuz I think that's how we met but I did you know I think a lot of people yet because I was I was roommates with Zack it's cool I feel like the people that we know like a our age group because we're four years apart but like all of us hung out we know so many people that I feel like we know so many of the same similar people I was talking I was with lunch with at lunch with Shay Lee's mom yesterday and we were talking about yeah she had her 50th birthday party she's telling me that you know people from her childhood came and friends she was friends with when she was 16 and 15 you know there's cool stuff but and I asked her I said did you

[00:06:02] Jaycie: Like really get many new friends after high school like it so after high schools done you know they didn't have cell phones and Facebook and MySpace and stuff so it's like who they know is who they grew up with and then in I mean think of like we didn't know each other in high school I don't think I mean all the people that we know like all the people that I met from living with Dyer and vice versa it's something new

[00:06:26] Jacob: Like we know probably hundreds more people than our parents did % yeah it's cool but it's also I think that it's it was such an exciting thing when it happened you know right thing off social media now I realized that like man it's hard to keep up with that many people yeah you know we're an interesting time with knowing so many

[00:06:49] Jaycie: People it's also I feel like with being on social media it's a lot easier to make more and not always the case but

[00:06:59] Jacob: Like more of like a synthetic relationship it's still friendly it's still cordial it's still nice you said you care about that person but at the end of the day it's like you know there's not real raw conversations because you know 90% of their life through social media and it's like such a weird I don't know you know like our parents didn't have that had made these real raw connections that they had to maneuver through as a child and like take that with them through older age and not to say that I haven't made real rock connections through social media as well but it's very far and few in between and so like that's like you know there's no there's no one person I think from you know school high school that I went to school with and I'm still friends with currently yeah that's strange to you right yeah do you think it's um do you think it's I mean it's gotta be it's because we obviously are environments like we just don't hang out the same people but it's because we change because we grow we adapt I mean I

[00:08:00] Jacob: Think that's a huge thing that obviously our parents know that they change from when their childhood but I think that what our what our generation is really realizing is that we changed more than once like we really kind of grow out of friends sometimes I can for a couple years even yeah it's as much as we want to hang on to all those friendships it's not about like letting it go it's about just like not being so invested in other people's lives and knowing everything about them and in like so like I don't really know what you've been up to you but instead of me knowing on social media or whatever advice versa we just like we just took a walk before this podcast just like caught up and he's just so great like I find a lot more value and stuff like that I know now the time people have a lot of extra time to just go for a walk with a friend you know so I'm very blessed with that but I don't know it I think just

[00:08:53] Jaycie: Noticing stuff like that is very

[00:08:56] Jacob: Beneficial that's something that anybody can benefit from like if you feel like you're not playing I'm kind of strong connections anybody listening now if you feel like you're not feeling strong connections with your friends and the people around you like are you hanging out with them too much are you seeing them too much are you texting them every waking second like maybe let them experience some other **** and then you goes to experience some other **** you guys meet together next week and talk about it you know yeah I don't know I think it feels

[00:09:24] Jaycie: Better that way right like a portion of

[00:09:29] Jacob: That or majority of that is not having

[00:09:31] Jaycie: Like you were saying earlier and we when we were on our walk it's like there's not a lot of present people mm-hmm you

[00:09:39] Jacob: Know like we're so drawn to like what's going on around us you know it's what is the word that I'm looking for cyber Li is not even a word yeah did the digital anything you say in that position is like sounds like some sort of movie scenario like whatever you say there's just stuck with the movies here but we

[00:10:07] Jaycie: Are so sorry so we're so caught in the digital or so we're so caught up in the technology not present like I try

[00:10:21] Jacob: And you know make it a point that like and not that I'm high and mighty for doing this I just tried to make me try though when I'm with somebody to make sure that I'm present to make sure that I'm aware to make sure that I like and stuffing away you know anything that's

[00:10:37] Jaycie: Gonna give me a distraction to what the

[00:10:41] Jacob: Other person is doing or what we are communicating about and that's you know it's not always the case for me but and I find that you know there's a decent amount of people who don't take the time to be present and like what you're what's right in front of you like the person or the person that's communicating with you or talking with you or yeah you know like well isn't it crazy that we don't we were talking about how we didn't realize that we're not doing that for a long time like being present is so anybody so think about any listeners if that seems overly obvious where that seems like it doesn't make sense to you like of course I'm talking to the person where were your thoughts when you're talking to somebody are you thinking about something else are you thinking about a judgement are you engaged in listening are you waiting for your turn to speak are you looking at your phone these things like it's not like these are rules and your life suddenly gets better when you do these things but you notice how often you weren't doing these things when you when you make it a point to try to do them so maybe just next

[00:11:45] Jacob: Time you have a conversation next time you're talking to somebody like are you standing up straight and looking in the eyes are you it's your phone in your hand even are you what's your body language you know just being present in conversations is it's um it's

[00:12:00] Jaycie: It's weirdly not easy to do right is

[00:12:04] Jacob: Easy to do but it's also like more Monumental than monumental then you think it's flavorful weird I like that's good yeah but to somebody else Like you never know like how much somebody just needs like your presence and like here do you and your effort and your energy even just for five seconds or 10 minutes or an hour you know and

[00:12:29] Jaycie: That's like moreso not maybe not more so but like more what

[00:12:38] Jacob: I try to bring aware to myself is because like you know like I'm sure you've been in this position or but I know personally myself I've been in a position where I've like paid attention to or wanted somebody to just give me like a certain fraction of a timeframe just because I was mentally not in a spot where like oh that's what you think I need you just yeah and not getting that reciprocated which you know

[00:13:00] Jaycie: That happens it's where we're at right

[00:13:03] Jacob: But if you have if you could recognize it though like if you can if you can see the times when you weren't doing it you can you know start to notice he even have sympathy when other people aren't doing it like you notice if other people aren't paying attention to you can say like oh okay what's the thing that I do to like it's okay maybe you could do something to have them pay more attention or if it's a close relationship you can actually have a conversation with them you know it's like Shane Lee and I have conversations all the time you know if she's on her phone she's actually able to notice like oh shoot okay you know what I was kind of just slacking off on my snapchat for a few as we were talking and she gets herself present like I noticed that stuff now I think it's something we can

[00:13:44] Jaycie: All do it's just once you notice it opens up this penis have you I mean I just my life has changed drastically from meditation and yoga and stuff have you done into meditation now tell me about your meditation so I think when you were like jumping off social media you were like reaching out for remind you how long ago was that it's been a

[00:14:14] Jacob: While it's been a long time yeah it's been I mean it I feel like I kind of a yeah it's almost about a year August 10th was like my biggest like Mike when I have like a moment you know in my head that something flip but it like led to I think probably over the next three months I probably to social media so let's say I don't know

[00:14:33] Jaycie: Anyway around anyway okay so I think during that timeframe between like August and December year they made it a point to be like hey what are some things that like helped you with you know I forgot I did this yeah but you did you're like what are some things that you do and like that helped you and

[00:14:53] Jacob: I started with app on my phone just

[00:14:58] Jaycie: Because I was like not in a good

[00:15:01] Jacob: Headspace at all whatsoever like I was

[00:15:04] Jaycie: Like totally at my wit's end not happy and so much so to worry Libby we was

[00:15:10] Jacob: Like one of my many therapists I've ever

[00:15:13] Jaycie: Had which I'm like all for talking about being open about therapy good for you yeah but so she it was just like you know it's at some point like you have to really try and something that you could do is like meditate and I was like how am I gonna sit here and like yeah like

[00:15:34] Jacob: Okay I'm just gonna sit here I'm really anxious and you're telling me just chill out right it's kind of you know your brain goes yeah and so I'm gonna sit here and just like breathe and like relax and I know I like seemed like a

[00:15:49] Jaycie: Very low mellow person but my brain is

[00:15:53] Jacob: Literally always looping like so high speed fast pace it's really hard for me to even like go to sleep at night like it takes me so long so there's so many people that are like this so many it's if you are if you're like this if you feel crazy all the time that's okay you're just human we could figure it out yeah meditation helps for sure I totally

[00:16:14] Jaycie: Had to utilize that to basically just dial everything in and it's been a pretty easy process to get into yeah just making it kind of routine and just kind of like guide nation is where I started and then you know went from guided meditation to just

[00:16:34] Jacob: Kind of like you listen to music just like mellow music it's just YouTube so my best friend on that ass absolutely yeah and it's just it's cool to like not be in my own head for 10-15 minutes just as long as the video you know or the music or write whatever in its it's really neat a turning point where I can not only take those 10 or 15 minutes but also like learn how to manage and breathe through everyday life you know yeah so I want to I want to try to

[00:17:12] Jaycie: Describe to people like him I want people who have tried meditation and think they failed and I want people who have never tried meditation but they think they know something about it cuz that I would fall into the second category out I would be like yeah dude like I'm not a monk so yeah like oh you meditate cool well I have ADHD so if i sat still I'd go crazy that's living something I would say so your therapist suggested meditation and so you just add a little bit like headspace was that the app user headspace I have tried that app I liked it too it's like yeah I think it was like the one he has like an Australian voice she's the most delightful voice this minute I think it was the thing is this no ya

[00:17:52] Jacob: Don't totally know what you're saying yeah so when you listen to if you

[00:18:00] Jaycie: Never listen to a guide a meditation you know they kind of run you through they have some basics of what you really do

[00:18:07] Jacob: So they run you through kind of what

[00:18:11] Jaycie: Your thoughts are doing it's not just the act of sitting there and something magical pops out of your butt like yeah he's it's the act of watching your thoughts and realizing that you aren't your thoughts it's mindfulness meditation is what it's pretty much of what it's called in the Western world

[00:18:27] Jacob: So you did a headspace do you remember

[00:18:30] Jaycie: Like your first time with the meditation like do you remember how it went and ah

[00:18:33] Jacob: Yeah it was like I remember being in this house and a basement lived in them shout out to basements with a very similar gray walls and family English a degree was no funny gray Ross and faceless these were actually wood walls but I painted them of course but I remember like you know

[00:18:57] Jaycie: How when you're sitting like most of

[00:19:02] Jacob: Most of the times stereotypically you're supposed to be like sitting lawyer meditate of course here I cannot do that yeah the total I love laying down okay

[00:19:13] Jaycie: Love just completely relaxing and just

[00:19:17] Jacob: Letting like my entire site literally just laid in bed and I had perfect yeah

[00:19:22] Jaycie: I was super that's not doing meditation wrong like that's not wrong like even if video says sit on your butt it's like if you're not sitting on your butt it's like how **** this up all right here I'm brewing his meditation it's you know you can lean on so you laid down for your first time yeah and I just played this guided it's like I think there's like certain levels only it's been a long time since I've used every certain step since I was like level one or step one you play it and this guy comes up and I'm just sitting here like oh boy here we go weirdo but yeah I know you do honestly it feels so weird like the first time you're just like sitting there because you're solely focused on like yourself at that point and not like so much stuff that's surrounding you're literally dialed into what is going on with you and it's like so weird when for me personally I'm so like oh

[00:20:14] Jacob: We're you know like of other people and what they're doing in their lives and what I can do to benefit myself and their lives you know exactly like that so it was like really weird for me to like turn everything in wear it and be like okay oh **** this is like alright here we go my thoughts are crazy now that I'm looking at him yeah you know yeah it's kind of funny when you when you sit down you know you think there's like intention like you have to think how to not have a thought that's what we think we have to do like you sit down and quit doing the thought yeah that's not what you do here

[00:20:50] Jaycie: With meditation when you sit down and you can download that the app headspace there's plenty of apps and we really just try any of them and just so far the ones that I've tried quite a few and they've been honestly all great I think they're great starters it's all that stuff is at your fingertips like that YouTube whatever guided meditation whatever you sit down and you wouldn't when thoughts come up you don't identify with them so it's like my leg itches you can say oh that's a thought about my legging and then you return to your breath or whatever the instructor is telling you that's pretty much the essence of meditation right that's the thing it's like for a long time I remember I don't know if you had this experience but I was like there's no way this is all meditation is like it's not just watching good thoughts like this doesn't make sense yeah but I don't know

[00:21:39] Jacob: Did you have that did you like were

[00:21:42] Jaycie: You shocked to the simplicity of meditation yeah this is just the concept of like really having to make it a point to just like write it out but also like

[00:21:55] Jacob: Breathe through what you were thinking

[00:22:00] Jaycie: And what you're I don't break this what you're thinking what you shouldn't be thinking I guess and even when you like quote-unquote shouldn't be thinking something like you stopped to write that thought out understanding that concept of like we are human and it's okay to have these nuts but it's crazy that like we don't simplify it that much like we

[00:22:23] Jacob: Totally expand our thoughts and their negative thoughts more so than our positive thoughts oh yeah like we dissect the crap out of us I know there are us like it's a I always compare it this may make sense to you I try to crazily explain concepts like this is Shaylee but I always talk about our maze like the maze of what we're dealing with right now like our emotions whatever the situation is that's happening that we're so stressed about is just a dead end in our maze that we're in but the thing about the maze is you can realize that

[00:23:00] Jaycie: You don't even have to be in Maes so that's what meditation does for me is instead of trying to sit down and solve all these problems and like why am i this way when I'm in this way I can realize that I can be a layer above this maze and I even be in it and watch myself try to solve those thoughts did I go and I don't have to I don't have to be in there in that maze to watch my thoughts and so for me that kind of like with that an Audi I feel I get it yeah it expands it I guess I guess suppose it

[00:23:37] Jacob: Just helps me identify with not only the dead ends in the maze but the fact that I am NOT the maze yeah no that makes it confusing Spence I just kind of like instead of going in blindly like you're rising above it and you're just like yourself to this point where you're like alright this is this is who I am

[00:23:59] Jaycie: I'm not I'm not yeah I'm not this person that's blind and lost or negative running to a dead end or feeling you're like I'm this person who is just maneuvering through life and I yeah exactly I'm glad to get it yeah good so ok meditation I just want to like to beat it to a pope so for me so for me it turned into a daily thing for me but so

[00:24:30] Jacob: You started with the app I'm sure you probably have some sort of like daily practice right now I mean like what do you I mean it's okay so what about mindset like do you have like it's like everlasting mindset that I gave to you right even though yes yeah so

[00:24:46] Jaycie: There's like I started with headspace and then I kind of grew from there to

[00:24:52] Jacob: Like YouTube and other stuff like that but now it's just I am at a point where like I can differentiate my thought process you know that's kind of beautiful yeah what they gave me and not that I'm always aware it always yeah of

[00:25:07] Jaycie: Course human I'm gonna that's the thing that meditation taught you is that you're not always like it helps you sympathize with yourself but I'm definitely at a point where like I can say a scenario that happens it's just like negative instead of like choosing to go down a negative path or a negative thought process I'm just like yeah whatever any hole any like that's a possibility it's a dead-end in the maze that I could take but like I'm not even go into that maze yeah which I think that's super cool I like haven't really brought awareness of that even so thank you for pointing that out but that's yeah that's definitely what has what I've like grown into

[00:25:51] Jacob: Through meditating even just the last you know I wouldn't two years I want to say right yeah do you like now that so like let's just generalize like a meditative mindset let's just call that like just you know whether the act of looking at the fact that your emotions and your actions couldn't be biased you know the are that we're not always perfect but that's okay you know just observing our thoughts rather than

[00:26:18] Jaycie: Being our thoughts this mindset like it happened for you like two years ago or so or not to use more with it slowly

[00:26:28] Jacob: Started the process mm-hmm like two years ago so it wasn't like an immediate like it was some work it's a lot of work yeah so I think that's what people need to hear right is that like in that there's part of that parts of that where you almost dread you're like well great like cool I don't have two years until I can get better you know like **** but that's how life goes like but it's if you just take one step towards like you just sat down and you're like I don't automatically download you just take the things in your life that and just face at them maybe it's gonna take a couple years and we're always working out so that's it's so funny that you say that that was I think one of the biggest when I literally had like my one of my therapists look at me be like it takes work to be happy mm-hmm just like I

[00:27:19] Jaycie: Think about that every day that was like does he have years ago and I'm like every time some he's like so sad and I'm like me and I really care for you and I'm really sorry like I make it a point to be like it does take a lot of work to be ready so if you genuinely like want to put in the work and the effort you like it's not gonna you're not gonna wake up one morning and be like man I'm so happy I like that yeah

[00:27:44] Jacob: It's so funny because it's like no **** right of course we know that but then sometimes you can be in a moment where you're susceptible and you're ready to hear it's like you have that moment your therapist like what you think you heard it and you're like okay and do you think at that moment he was probably like hard-hitting right you hear this thing in exams right yeah you know I

[00:28:05] Jaycie: Think and so like these podcasts are stuff like that - like which is it's gonna open up this can of whoop-ass which is just I'm super pumped about but

[00:28:14] Jacob: I think by having more upfront conversations like this and talking about like our faults you know as friends I think I hope that it can open up conversations between friends not just on podcast but like why not have situations where our homies are our counselors and saying I came in your

[00:28:31] Jaycie: You've not been doing what you want to do and I know you better than that you know but we can't have those conversations because my friends just like they think they're being attacked personally and whatever but there's a lot of people who love you and not that everybody's opinion is always valid like sometimes people just don't know what you're going through but I don't know I think it we could you see could

[00:28:52] Jacob: You see like our world and you know let's say next five years like where we can just call each other out like this like not like this but yeah just say if you had a podcast you ain't call each other no but yeah I do I kind of I

[00:29:09] Jaycie: Already see it I'm already like amongst

[00:29:12] Jacob: You know a decent amount of paper and it could just be that I like love being around people who like to call me on my **** right but you know and vice versa is sick not afraid to sit down to be like hey this is what's up but I do totally see it evolving into that kind of like friendship level where we can just like sit down mainly because like there's a lot of broken people

[00:29:38] Jaycie: A lot of broken people who don't know what to do or which way to go and then

[00:29:44] Jacob: There's like a decent amount of people

[00:29:47] Jaycie: Who have gone through like a situation

[00:29:52] Jacob: Or scenario or I don't I don't really know like what to call it where you just kind of I think evolving quick involvement I mean waking up is what the internet calls it but like I feel like I miss BAM like I feel like the first comment on my YouTube is gonna be woke AF this is WellCare or something I'm not I know I like to say a shift like you

[00:30:15] Jaycie: You just shift into like this

[00:30:18] Jacob: Person who is beneficial to those

[00:30:22] Jaycie: Surrounding you and yourself actually

[00:30:25] Jacob: But and so I you know I feel like as being one of those persons I mean not to me like you are what else person you are you're on the junker left podcast you are it's pretty much hey by the way if you're on the junk love podcasts um I plan on going places so yeah you're going to have a responsibility whether you're here whether you want to be here not you I feel like I want to like just make a bunch of pressure on people be like hey this is really important but

[00:30:55] Jaycie: It's just me like smoking weed or

[00:30:58] Jacob: Something like I'm just doing nothing you know I'm playing with play-doh on my podcast me this is so important

[00:31:08] Jaycie: Skateboard you still have it oh yes you do perfect that's just what you doing here I'm devastated I don't worth that

[00:31:19] Jacob: Pause the podcast so I technically there's even people who want to watch tactics you know people want to watch people skateboard there's plenty there's little kids who are famous for tech decking you have their entire College paid for probably where we live in yeah it's actually pretty cool no I know props to the parents who made it a point to make their children's college and success through YouTube well he you don't be weird imagine the **** that you're into when you were being how you make a million dollars like what were you into when you were seven or eight years old or some **** I think I think I baked a lot like Easy

[00:32:00] Jaycie: Bake Ovens it's no think like you baked

[00:32:03] Jacob: Yeah real baking yeah see that would have been actually fruit Allah that's like the worst example of I'm like what if you did Polly Pockets forever

[00:32:10] Jaycie: I don't really know still bake yeah I

[00:32:16] Jacob: Mean for my own pleasure I mean that's still I mean there dude food tastes better when it's you know you put love and time into it and you spend time making it yeah it's mostly out of a box in your butt right it still tastes good so it's yeah so you just eat it right off the box huh just open it up an eater a box she used to be a baker as she grew up and now she just puts her hand into the box of brownie mix and eats it dry mouth think about it yes but yeah no I can not imagine being seven years old and creating a success off of my

[00:32:57] Jaycie: Interest how cool would that be I mean it'd be cool but being a lot of pressure like think about like you okay I'm seven I just did this thing alright I'm done with that like now I'm fourteen I really got a what's my next stage in life like these little kids have like they've just done the thing like as

[00:33:15] Jacob: A kid all you want is a quest you know like you just like if you just give me a quest I will follow this quest yeah it'll be my destiny like I want to believe in something and like we all have you know we're like I want to be a firefighter or astronaut or whatever they have you write down and it's cool it's like imagine actually getting those kids who get that like they're like I want to be I want to review Hot Wheels on YouTube I don't know if it's good or

[00:33:43] Jaycie: Bad to give kids exactly what they want

[00:33:45] Jacob: I think in that situation it depends on

[00:33:50] Jaycie: The person I guess I mean the child could be great though but think about I mean think about again this person has to now later on in life they have to be 20 years old they have to be a 21 year old they have to like I don't know I always think about Minecraft oh yeah or like they've

[00:34:06] Jacob: Already done it like they've already like a live or they've already decided who they were like I went through so many stages growing up like I was you know whatever I would do or try to be to battle the personal issues that I was going on you know like I guess that would be pretty depressing successful when I fourteen years ago when I was seven so what the **** do I do with my life now would it solidify whoever the hell you think you are when you're seven like I'm Lego master I may be when you're 25 you're like I'm still Lego master what do you mean mom don't you remember and she's like fold your clothes what are you moving out what are you I'm a star mom that would be almost a crisis

[00:34:59] Jaycie: Maybe not though yeah I think not always getting what you want is such a blessing learning experiences you don't get to learn much if you always get what you want ya know I definitely feel like going

[00:35:11] Jacob: Going through all of the hardest in most

[00:35:16] Jaycie: Light like through my lifetime like all of those were definitely experiences like I wouldn't have evolved

[00:35:23] Jacob: Or shifted into this person that I am today without having like a trip trial and error and like you know being frickin negative thirty five dollars in my account for stupid overdrive yeah been there plenty of times sometimes they just keep coming out and you're like I am negative $200 because four things came out yeah we know how it goes

[00:35:43] Jaycie: It's weird that like so even casual

[00:35:46] Jacob: Conversations about being broke can only be it seems like even that in our normal conversation it's always like a joke you think a joke out of like oh I'm poor or whatever I'm broke but it's dude if you're going through financial **** like just so you know everybody has gone through financial **** like yeah the people who have it all together like aren't trying to walk around saying that they have it all together it's like I don't know I

[00:36:08] Jaycie: Think but my friend me and my friend Scott we're talking about we grew up together and we kind of we're talking

[00:36:16] Jacob: The mindset behind finances you know like we're both like me and we both kind of always sucked in money like it's just been this thing you know but I think realizing that the person to your left and the person to your right like sometimes they have money issues too yeah like it's okay to talk about them like you don't have to like demean yourself you don't feel bad whatever it's I think that's a part of life and that's a part of growing because I can't without having those like failures that financially especially being a young adult like life Sarge shit's expensive anymore and so like with having those without having those struggles like I don't think that I would have the drive to like do more for myself financially or do you know what I

[00:37:01] Jaycie: Mean yeah it was like totally normal

[00:37:04] Jacob: Like I being negative in my bank account as a 20 year old or 21 year you know

[00:37:11] Jaycie: Back whatever like that's fine like but did you isn't it funny how like it often will me anyway I feel like such a **** failure sometimes when I was broke I think if I didn't have any money I would just be like gosh like dude like

[00:37:22] Jacob: I didn't get my **** together like I'd always feel like I don't have my **** to get like that's what that means so much bunch of money in my account means I don't have my **** together ya know I definitely was low you feel pretty low about yourself you feel like okay well I mean this is something that I can acquire what am i doing that like is do you know making this not easy for

[00:37:48] Jaycie: Me but it's not it's not easy that's

[00:37:51] Jacob: The thing it's like you feeling that low just like that's my mean like that gives me the drive to just like yeah get my **** together correctly I mean it's I don't know well so that's the thing is

[00:38:04] Jaycie: It is that's the thing it's like it's okay like but you got to look at look at these things as like yeah it's okay like I don't have to hate myself but like I don't have money but I want money okay what can I do differently like not

[00:38:19] Jacob: What can what has the world done wrong to me that's given me not the opportunities that I want for money yeah it's what can I do different like when you when you have those because I think of you know like rich kids or kids who like somehow I have money you know I'm like come into them it's something like if that's the case for you that's awesome yeah if you never learned what it is to not have it and in what it is - I

[00:38:47] Jaycie: Guess you learn the hard way yeah it's

[00:38:51] Jacob: Something that like the learning experience people don't actually always get know which is you know more about you if you can go through life that way and come out of you know decent human being and know for real still like the you know but yeah at the end of the day it's like when you really have to grind for it that's almost like when you reach that level of success like when you have to grind for it and not saying I'm there like right but reaching that level or that point of success after you've grinded for it for so long after being so depressed because you're negative and your bank account is like such a humbling feeling it's like you're depressed if you're if you are like broke right now and you're depressed like just know like let that feel you and Drive you for that humbling experience you know when you reach your goal or destination sex financial you

[00:39:45] Jaycie: Wait yeah exactly our pains like our art

[00:39:48] Jacob: Pains and our issues like where we okay I'm broke like this is an issue that I need to solve that's something to solve and when you when you see that as something you could solve then that's how your life gets better like those are it's like gonna cop my life couldn't get better I don't know how to make my life better okay we'll take a look here she is and start solving them individually you know say like money is a big issue for me what's going on my money situation when you look at it and you start just trying to solve it that's one step closer to getting better this is one little thing it's yeah I feel like even putting out like I think I just I'm

[00:40:26] Jaycie: Like I post a lot like you've logged

[00:40:29] Jacob: On your Junkyard Love okay so like I

[00:40:35] Jaycie: Write like I'll post a picture and I

[00:40:38] Jacob: Might started writing like really long intricate like just because I personally am really uncomfortable and friend seeing you know seeing yourself no I am too I'm working

[00:40:49] Jaycie: On that planet to hear myself that's

[00:40:51] Jacob: Right yeah I do I got it but I just I

[00:40:56] Jaycie: Blog everything so I posted the other

[00:40:59] Jacob: Day about like after hitting a huge

[00:41:04] Jaycie: Milestone in my life I like very shortly

[00:41:07] Jacob: Became very sad afterwards and due to

[00:41:10] Jaycie: Not having goals and ambitions because Goals are legitimately back this is a totally no I would love to cover this area but I like sat down with my boyfriend and just like had a conversation and was talking and I was like and he felt very similar which he's Not like a very sad person and so we just like sat down and had this conversation of like okay what are we doing what do we need to change what's happening and he's like I think that we just was brave yeah we were just like so excited to hit this huge milestone for us that we didn't plan

[00:41:46] Jacob: Anything after and so we just kind of like hit this wall had this breakthrough and there was like nothing to follow

[00:41:54] Jaycie: That nothing no goals to hit no nothing exciting I mean it was exciting but like he works realistically like so we must sat down and like made it a point to like continue making like goals no

[00:42:08] Jacob: Matter what it is big or small like make a list of you know like what do we need

[00:42:13] Jaycie: To do next and that's like really been

[00:42:16] Jacob: Like a turning point for me just because you know I worked so hard and I'm being happy all the time and let that comes with having goals and having visions and like we have something to work for you have something to be happy about yeah cuz how else do you gauge your happiness like how do you host you know how you're doing yeah like hey like how you doing man like we never know how to answer that anyway maybe it's because we really don't know like how you doing working toward your goals I don't know what my goals are so I don't know what I'm working towards yeah we're not we're not living to just live as long as we can we should all be living towards our own virtues our own goals our no value yeah so when you if you're cool talking about it when you and Jace like how did this conversation go like I imagine there's probably plenty of people who you know there's a lot of relationships where we're a lot of people it's hard to get on the same page you know we're so layers deep in our

[00:43:09] Jacob: Arguments or our pit enos that we don't really realize that we're doing sometimes when these conversations start to come up they get and it seems like a little too quick without with our emotions I'm I know I've been there Shaylee zou it's been there you know in

[00:43:22] Jaycie: Certain situations how did this conversation go so it's like hey like I'm just I don't know what it is I'm not feeling super great like what can we be doing differently or I think it's

[00:43:33] Jacob: Started with I'm just a very like

[00:43:36] Jaycie: Sensitive human being I'm very emotional and I'm very wait you girl yes and like that it's a very weird position to be in a lot of the times and so I'm very expressive and I'm very like I will

[00:43:53] Jacob: Write out my emotions and I will be so raw and so real tune extent like I'm not so extreme where you know hurts my

[00:44:01] Jaycie: Everyday life yeah but you are yourself

[00:44:04] Jacob: And yourself as an emotional person yeah yeah and that's totally okay and I'm super you come in terms of that like that's just who I am and that's like know people shout out yeah of course actually but so going through that I made it a like I'm just very

[00:44:22] Jaycie: Expressive so I'm very low-energy you know just very symptomatic of just being and just a little depressive funk which still happens as happy as I am that still is a battle I have to fight

[00:44:34] Jacob: Through every so often and I'm okay with that too you ever done yes no I think it was probably like a few days of just like going through the motions of like getting up going to work coming home like I like when I stopped making dinner as I cook I like I cook often you love

[00:44:57] Jaycie: Cooking yeah well you like baking stuff

[00:45:02] Jacob: Yeah like the end of cooking yeah but so and I just left a really home-cooked meal so no something you know I grew up with my dad so that's something that I just learned from him so because breeding you know it's not just the food yeah and so when I stopped making cooked

[00:45:22] Jaycie: Meals Jace is like he's like woman who

[00:45:27] Jacob: Make me yeah so he knew something is wrong like you know it's gone sorry thank you like made it a point and I'm just like sitting on the couch or watching Netflix I'm like not talking because they just kind of shut down like is go within myself and dig deep and you know figure out what I need to do and so he just like made it a point to say like

[00:45:57] Jaycie: Hey pin what's up yeah wrong no I'm

[00:46:01] Jacob: Just really sad I've just been sad for a few days I'm just trying to like power through it you know because I think and he's like why are you sad and that was just like I don't I don't know like I'm just you know like I haven't figured it out yet cuz you don't know where it's

[00:46:17] Jaycie: Coming from I think that's that sentence right there I just want to pause in that because I think for me a lot of like me

[00:46:25] Jacob: Getting to a point where I can explain myself to Shaylee a little better you know because like when I was like very depressed and very like not having great thoughts there was little years where she didn't know like I would she did not know that I was good what I was going through like any anxiety tax like and in those situations she would want to understand and I would just shut down and so the Chi she would do what Jay said is like what's going on like what's wrong or something and I would just shut down so I wish I just wanna point out like it's great that you're like you know honestly I don't know I don't know and that's okay like we don't always know it's like man so I'm just **** it off right but as we're

[00:47:05] Jacob: Probably about to get to you probably started talking and like once you guys get kind of Tennison you know like the ideas back to each other like okay so what's going on like it's not this like I don't know it just seems like whatever once you get talking with who cares about you and you care about it kind of falls out so you don't always have to already know what's going on but if you feel like you're in a weird funk like just maybe sit if a damn dinner table or sitting on couch and whatever just be us with your significant other so yeah so you brought it up to Jace or Jace brought it up to you and you were very susceptible to it what where to go from here I'm like yeah I totally get the shutting down part and that's like if you need to go through that's totally okay to go through that and just know a bit like it took me a long time to even get to the point where like I can look at somebody and be like you know here's the there's a tee

[00:47:58] Jaycie: Here's what's going on right and so I yeah I just made it a point and it wasn't it wasn't like this smooth this conversation right off the bat it's kind

[00:48:10] Jacob: Of weird like I feel like sometimes when

[00:48:13] Jaycie: You're with somebody who's a little bit

[00:48:17] Jacob: More structured in the in the best way Jace is like the most growth mindset awesome dude I know yeah so he I'm gonna have him on here just say deal it so it means there's no he'll be uneasy for me

[00:48:33] Jaycie: I'm very like go through the motions

[00:48:36] Jacob: Allow myself to be depressed for two

[00:48:38] Jaycie: Weeks and nothing denarian Jace is like what do I need to do right here right now like to fix this and blah so in

[00:48:45] Jacob: Like a very like contradicting conversation but the

[00:48:49] Jaycie: Outcome was good because like it kind of brought awareness that like I was like hey I'm sad and he's like well what do you need to do to fix it I'm just like I don't even know why I'm sad but

[00:49:00] Jacob: Then yeah we should do I come family when he figured out me know but yeah if you know if any or google searches have any answer it's just if you could send me that link no he's literally like the

[00:49:12] Jaycie: Like greatest minds out all the time so he's a powerful dude yeah but so yeah we like took me a

[00:49:21] Jacob: Couple of days and then like for him to have a day off and then I think I came home from work because we have like one day off throughout the week in one day that were like you know so I worked a full day and he was at home he's like ya know I just like really feel like once we moved in here things just kind of like plateaued and so he took that day and he was like yeah I just really had to dig deep and that's where he like sat down and like he's made you know his list of goals and stuff and then we like communicated and he was just like yeah I think that we really need to like work toward something else and you know build this life and continue building and you know like I feel like we just got so excited on this high of like buying or starting a new chapter in our lives that we kind of forget that our lives continuously keep going even out of that chapter and like yeah you started chapter one and then you just like oh **** we got to write a book I think that's the

[00:50:21] Jacob: Beauty then that's the thing that's what life will always teach you know if you really think back think about the things that you have now sorry but the things that you have now and you know there is a point where you dreamt of having them like they're all you wanted you know okay like I even like look like this **** microphone you know like when I bought it I probably obsessed over it for like the four hours I think I probably looked at all the different options or whatever it might have been you got to take time to like enjoy the things you're doing but then like but then say okay what's our next thing we're doing what's our because your life is those in-between your life isn't that moment where you finally have the trophy in your hand it's getting to the trophy yes it's it's how do I get another trophy and it's yeah life is life is a book that

[00:51:12] Jaycie: Like I feel like as humans we forget

[00:51:14] Jacob: That and it's so basic like meditating you know it's not always grasp like when

[00:51:22] Jaycie: You reach like your destination I guess like the end goal the end game it's like not as fulfilling as you expected thank you like it is and then a visit it's like all right on to the next like we're such a moving species yeah and that we forget that like the movement is like what Creed's who we are right it's about the movement

[00:51:48] Jacob: I am I listen to a lot of album Lots you know he said philosopher I feel like he has this he has this thing he talks about and it was it was one of my ha moments one of my favorite things to do is listened I can put him on like I'm dizzy YouTube and I put him in my headphones I walk in the backyard and just let the revelations come he had this thing he's talking about dancing like what is it dance little life is like advance we to be the best answer

[00:52:18] Jaycie: It's not about getting from here to there the fastest it's not about a destination it's to be the best singer

[00:52:26] Jacob: To be the best guitar player it's not about playing the most notes the fastest it's that in-between you know what you don't dance if you asked an answer why they dance they don't say so I can get from here to there in the most efficient way it's the in-between like that's what life is you know and he I remember I had this moment he said that and I've been like working through much stuff and it was so gravel Ettore I'm like that seems so simple and it seems I can make sense but it can be really a revelatory statement something great yeah that's Alan Watts it's like my favorite philosopher if anybody wants to dive into if you just ever want to let your mind go just Alan Watts on

[00:53:08] Jaycie: YouTube just explore him yeah but yeah

[00:53:13] Jacob: That in between I think so goal-setting

[00:53:19] Jaycie: It kind of keeps that in-between alive

[00:53:21] Jacob: You know like making sure that like so you guys probably have some sort of and it'll get better over the years I'm sure but you guys probably have some sort of like I hate next Sunday let's sit down look at our goals or you guys have anything like that leave it's something I'm working okay we haven't quite got there but we're kind of we would talk about that like it's something we're gonna be doing soon like we need to slow down a little bit to be able to do that or but we're both like in this weird so I would love that I would love to just sit down and have this like recap of stuff but you

[00:53:54] Jaycie: Know when you're like little bit you know like I'm sure when Shelly comes home like from work and you're like hey let's sound and have a conversation she says oh yeah poor thing she's talking about c-diff and I'm talking about like

[00:54:05] Jacob: Existential crisis is my yeah like she just she just wants to just be like babe stop talking about so much intent she right now ya know I mean we definitely will find time for it I mean yeah III know I well I'm sure you guys will too but it's something that is important we got to make time we can and it's not always like hey we don't have the time to talk about it's like in passing like next time you and Jace go to dinner you guys can chitchat about it casually or whatever you know like fine times in your relationship - not when we need to do this thing this way if there's something that maybe needs to talk about if you guys maybe aren't if you guys aren't both pursuing a goal right now in your relationship if you're listening for this you don't have to be that how do we fix this right now it's not that it's hey like you ever thought about make it a goal you ever thought about writing down our goals babe like that right there is working that's

[00:54:57] Jacob: Getting better that's self-love that question right there it's just a little nudge you have more questions like that they add up and then finally if you have time you know when we have time and a lot of busy - we can sit down hey let's write up more of our goals and let's write out goals in the first place or feel like that's like a very healthy standing point to like either be in or have a goal to be in that situation with

[00:55:21] Jaycie: Your significant other like to move

[00:55:24] Jacob: Forward and grow not only within yourself but with it somebody you know signs I and I feel like that's very important that's a pretty big deal like if you think about it like saying like okay this person doesn't know **** about their life like we don't know why we're here we don't know where we come from we're gonna world go when we die but same for me and I'm gonna take the

[00:55:45] Jaycie: Responsibility of them and they're gonna take responsibility and we're gonna try to figure out what we both equally think is best for our lives yeah that's crazy man like that's something we should take a little more serious I think yeah seriously but also like paying attention to your self yeah going through that cuz

[00:56:03] Jacob: Like yeah you always know you know feel it yeah you always you always feel like which direction you're going or what you need to be doing or you know but we as humans like to just you know make up scenarios I know you know or what is it somebody told me the other day they were talking about red flags or like Oh red flags I know what I need to be doing but I'm just like making up excuses you know you make excuses to like not follow your gut not do what you know you have to do that yeah we're really good at that but it's also learning experience too when you do that so yeah I think I say justifying your **** I think we really like justifying your **** we are doing a

[00:56:54] Jaycie: Fraud I was saying my burp oh not

[00:56:58] Jacob: Knowing or you don't know what you don't

[00:57:01] Jaycie: Know the

[00:57:08] Jacob: I mean lost it floated away that

[00:57:13] Jaycie: Happens I feel like that happens when you try and focus on it too like solely away like I know we had I think it was me and you see to me McHale moms or me and Jessica we're out here and you know like just getting better at conversating over time like just the more you do it but it's funny you realize you kind of get going and you

[00:57:36] Jacob: Know nobody's ever let me like talk for this long thank you it's funny podcast I've noticed I'm like oh wow like because you know it's a respectful like we're both a year to say we want to say but like me I'm like oh yeah you know no don't just wait like let her talk you know it's we got it we got to do that like it's really it's something that of course I want to just burst out what I'm saying but you got to work on in conversations and you notice that like sometimes people don't actually let you talk for this long and you get to a point like I don't know what to say anymore or I forgot what I

[00:58:06] Jaycie: Was talking about I was just so excited that you were letting me talk and it's really funny but you got to be forgiving with yourself I noticed that I used to do this and I would trail off and I lose my thought so to say and I would I would call myself an idiot on and say that gotta be like **** you gonna can't **** even keep my thoughts straight or whatever I get stressful though sometime right yeah but it's like you do it everybody have had on this broadcast does it I do it every person I've ever talked to them in whole life yeah it's

[00:58:33] Jacob: You remember you're human you know it's you notice when you're kind of giving yourself little beating yourself up a little bit about that like it's like losing your train of thought makes

[00:58:45] Jaycie: It's like a lot of anxiety you're like mmm when you're like just talking sometimes I find myself talking through like not really paying attention but like knowing what I'm saying just literally letting whatever I'm saying go right and then I like catch myself at the end like where was I going with that and I'm like yeah I know you're like wait was that down like a rabbit hole where I wasn't actually making sense

[00:59:11] Jacob: Yeah it's so funny you looking at you know an introspective of just the way that you talk the way that you know and we were talking about when you record yourself you differently like you almost make it okay to talk crap to yourself like Oh like pull your shirt down because you look fat or you're recording yourself when you say something wrong in the class **** and you delete it or like you like if someone else was speaking and they messed up over the words you would be like you know delete know as they're talking yeah you gotta be you gotta be more forgiving on yourself it's something we all gotta work on I think that for me I would say I know a lot I

[00:59:56] Jaycie: Would say I know I know I got to work on that or I know I'm been at that or um I'm getting better at it whatever and then I wouldn't actually look at it and change it so if you're someone who just says I know yeah that's cool so you're

[01:00:08] Jacob: Like meditating for 30 days and then sober yeah so I was thinking so but so okay so do you watch the Joe Rogan podcast at all yeah

[01:00:19] Jaycie: Jase more so than myself of course dude

[01:00:22] Jacob: I love Joe otherwise I can't even deny it like it's just the most wonderful community it's **** hilarious like there's different means make memes making fun of people who listen to Joe Rogan every day and they're just so funny like sure yeah my going so real I am one of those little buggers have you tried to empty you know like it's so I was inspired by that you know they have their whole friend group that does that and I was I was looking at that and I really had a moment of you know realistically you know call it cocky or strange to point out that you want but like a lot of people I've stayed in the same hometown

[01:01:04] Jaycie: Like I have actual I would say small town fame from being a DJ in a small town like it's a weird thing to point out on your own but like it's something that you have so I have people who look up to me have people who do follow what my friend group does and like it's something that I have like taking a step and I'm like okay like cool maybe it's just me being excited about it but it is kind of like Joe and his friends cool let's say that and when it like everybody really tried and like all these people who have never worked out a day in their lives people who probably have never meditated a day in their lives because they enjoy Joe Rogan and his friends whenever they tried this thing they didn't serve October I think hundreds and thousands of people like lost weight and did all these things tried things for 30 days whatever so like I don't know I just see

[01:01:49] Jacob: See my role as potentially could maybe

[01:01:52] Jaycie: Be that in this in our area and like not that I'm trying to be that but I'm saying if people are looking up to me if there's something that I want to do on my own anyway might as well just do a little extra work be public about it my friends are gonna do it anyway like my close friends you know might as well get everybody else on board so yeah

[01:02:11] Jacob: I think it'd be fun cool yeah what else what else do you think we should do let's so what would you do what would be something that you would want to do for 30 days like draw for 20 minutes a day or whatever like just think of anything read yeah I guess I'm like a super I

[01:02:37] Jaycie: Love just like reading mm-hmm

[01:02:42] Jacob: Self-help books oh yeah I was just a better term for it but self-help yeah I feel like a dork when you go to the library and there's yeah I shouldn't you

[01:02:52] Jaycie: Shouldn't feel like a dork though but I

[01:02:55] Jacob: Just a lot of monumental moments in my life I've been like literally reading a self-help book that's probably super cheesy but I don't care because I yeah so you know like I would not be here today without reading all these books so for 30 days of reading whatever solid yeah see you wanna yes that would be cool you know that what would be a cool way to portray that yeah like so so what do you think like 30 minutes a day or like a li sit down or like cuz I think you know trying to let me read this many books in 30 days okay making it a daily habit of just reading like a couple pages or mmm make sure you get some reading done a day yeah I

[01:03:44] Jacob: Think that's enough has to be a time frame if you sometimes if I like set a certain timeframe like I'm at the gym and I'm on the bike and it's like 20 minutes I'm like I don't really want to do this for 20 minutes like you know I'm gonna go do a lick or go anyway so like when I see that and I don't finish something 20 minutes I'm like damn I didn't even do that 20 minutes but well it builds habits with yourself it kind of like trains your brain in the wrong ways I feel like if you don't if you continuously not commit to things that you really want to do I think it kind of

[01:04:15] Jaycie: Trains your brain to like pick no that's

[01:04:17] Jacob: Okay if you don't do that like oh you want to eat healthy for 30 days we're at day 17 it's okay it's okay you're fine you don't have to you don't have to eat healthy anymore you said you're gonna go for 30 days I feel like it like adds up like after enough for those do just because I used to do that too like I would I would go it's 20 minutes was my thing - I love 20 minutes on the stair steppers what I would do and I would get like oh today is a 10 minutes day huh okay I'm tired it's like no setup to what you want to do sorry I

[01:04:45] Jaycie: Keep getting nasally you just talked about allergies earlier huh I know I know I'm like fighting my mom's cat and I'm like I don't know I'm pushing my allergies with my mom's cat I'm convinced the diet has everything to do with no I seriously oh geez 100% yeah

[01:05:05] Jacob: 100% believe yeah everything that you put into your body oh listen that they can fake **** so you can't pronounce yeah it's yeah no totally even just

[01:05:19] Jaycie: Switching from being like no fast food

[01:05:22] Jacob: To like home-cooked meals right is a significant difference I can only imagine I like more power to you effort living that lifestyle because I struggle oh I haven't been lately don't worry you

[01:05:37] Jaycie: Know this struggle it's hard I

[01:05:40] Jacob: Mean I still make a million little

[01:05:43] Jaycie: Decisions better today than I did a year

[01:05:46] Jacob: Ago you know like I used to like drink

[01:05:49] Jaycie: Energy drinks and go to the gas station and eat crappy food and fast food stuff all the time yeah it's it

[01:05:56] Jacob: Happens right yeah but making like little sacrifices here and there and not you know having cooked home-cooked meals when you can it's I feel like it helped my cognitive function like my brain and eating fast food and stuff you think that just hurts your stomach but all that shit's connected you know oh yeah that's all stomach is a pit of your entire being but in your stomach it

[01:06:19] Jaycie: Comes out all of your pores and

[01:06:22] Jacob: Everything like that it affects a lot of you like it's so did you did you ever go through thing where you eaten like a lot of fast food have you ever gone through that I just I have I've gone through literally like years and frankly I hate fast food pretty much every day I don't

[01:06:42] Jaycie: Know about every day probably when I was

[01:06:46] Jacob: Like 19 and I was just basically an

[01:06:48] Jaycie: Alcoholic because that's you to at 19 right yeah for like our whole culture is like well yeah we're just of course we're drunk we're ages 17 through 22

[01:06:59] Jacob: Thanks yeah so you know you'd get those dollar

[01:07:02] Jaycie: 49 Burger King nuggets for oh yeah you know with rice sauce that was like talked about all the time yeah but it's

[01:07:13] Jacob: But it's easy right it's easy which is what it's there for like it's if you know when you're on a rush like fast food is definitely faster is there for what it's like hey I gotta do all these things I'm in a rush or maybe like a treat or something but it's it really does benefit when you just try to not be eating that crap all the time yeah I'm trying to cook at home oh for sure or more so just like finding a healthier alternative but like that has been my biggest because sometimes I'm too busy and I'm like don't have time to just like go home like I'm home very late at night and making sure that like I'm eating something that's like not a burger through you know and easy for you

[01:07:54] Jaycie: To yeah but when you go through the periods I'm sure you've recognized this when you go through periods of time frames where you eat healthy and then you like switch back to eating unhealthy

[01:08:05] Jacob: You're paying for three years your body hates you seriously your body what the **** are you putting in me right now I thought we were done with that yeah I built up immunities to those things and made you just permanently bloat it I thought it's what you wanted it's crazy yeah and it's

[01:08:23] Jaycie: Like your body is like rejecting like no I told you no we already went through this yeah it's that weird you can eat McDonald's every day and you almost get used to it at some point and then you like you eat an apple or something healthy everybody just has the shits or something and then vice versa you eat healthy and you just have one yeah I

[01:08:43] Jacob: Don't know it's you know I feel like everybody kind of notices that but it's another one of those things that worth like and I know it's a it sucks yeah I'm working on getting better at food you know but I think just keep trying like literally just keep you never you never fail this stuff like we're we are so as a society we're so addicted to sugar so addicted to food in like it's okay like it's okay like it sucks don't be mad at yourself if you realize this like if what I've read this first time you realize in the year severely addicted to sugar unless you are knowingly eating paleo and you're listening to this then you're eating whole thirty you're **** addicted to sugar so addicted but it's

[01:09:22] Jaycie: Just start making little things

[01:09:25] Jacob: You know like if you drink 17 diet cokes at a drink 16 today drink 16 and a half like anything then learn a little bit make little sacrifices cook when you can

[01:09:35] Jaycie: Find some value in cooking like I mean

[01:09:38] Jacob: It seems like you and Jace have I'm sure there's even togetherness from you like cooking food you know like it just that creates even stronger boundaries in your relationship just cooking being at home in the kitchen you know yeah there's a lot of value in doing these things with intent you know yeah especially when

[01:10:00] Jaycie: Your life's wild man certainly is as we're trying to slowly figure it out I know at least we're trying yeah trying

[01:10:12] Jacob: Trying really means dude like trying doesn't mean that you ever really fail life or less trying means that you

[01:10:20] Jaycie: Every day all these little things all these different parts your life if you're not feeling the way you want to be feeling mentally you just got to be trying you gotta be under it but to try you have to understand that you're not a victim to it anymore you got it you can help the things that you're going through yes yeah for a while here I want to do a time check for you okay jaesi think you were coming to this I appreciate you've been on the junket

[01:10:50] Jacob: I love podcast yeah super fun super great conversation yeah well and I also plan on like I don't have any rules I don't have a **** director like I can do whatever I want this is me talking to my cool friends so we can schedule another one too if you have more stuff if there's in the next few months if there's something weighing on you if you meet somebody that you're like man this person would be cool like just come on with him you can come on with Jace - that'd be fun - I want definite one day yeah I want to do a powwow with just me and Jace but I think it'd be fun to have you get on there too you know because people I mean people I know a lot of cool people and I feel like it's kind of like it's like an honor of mine to showcase cool people to whoever's willing to listen

[01:11:41] Jaycie: Appreciate it

[01:11:43] Jacob: Yeah I appreciate you coming well thank you so much all right guys have a good

[01:11:48] Jaycie: Rest your day