Episode 007 with Jessica Faul

[00:00:00] Jessica: Thought plugins the plot thickens

[00:00:08] Jacob: [Laughter] we're in now we have to put our put our face on and be serious have to put our

[00:00:23] Jessica: We have to put our coffee shop mask on Oh what is that we're just talking about coffee shop maths

[00:00:28] Jacob: Welcome to the Junkyard Love Podcast which I'm spontaneously calling it right now Jessica Faul it's that way to have you Jessica Faul lovely to have you had to rerecord that because she punched the mic I had to edit it out so I was telling that my time is important she's already ruining it well I was turning like a radio show host I said I'm addicted roasted yes let's start there

[00:00:52] Jessica: Though with the coffee shop face so I was as I said weird we were just talking and I were talking about how you

[00:00:59] Jacob: Can't really turn off the if you work in retail for example you can't wait to turn off the retail face anymore if you live in your hometown or you live around people that you may see while you're working you have to do the Hey how are you today you know even if you haven't a terrible day like and so you work here you're your bartender you've worked in multiple places like you're 40 coffee shops like as you've been doing a degree like so you've you know how this is like so can you talk about like the mass that

[00:01:29] Jessica: We have to put on and the importance of let's say being able to turn it off or recognize it wearing the mask I think I would say like I constantly feel like wherever I'm going whatever I'm doing I'm really kind of like not always me I have to be very cautious tough to be very happy I've been I mean yummy to speak on like I was in social work and then I was also a bartender and so I have met various types of the community I've also worked in the schools to add on to that so yeah like I bet you'd like to be around it like you've had to keep a face up of like just in case people see me I've got to make sure I do this right you've had a role model it seems like I think that's kind of what I've be a role model make sure that other people can see you being nice and being a good you know right that's kind of been ingrained in me too but well do you think I mean it gets I think it gets thrown into the category of role model but it's I think it's something else it's like because you aren't really able

[00:02:27] Jacob: To be yourself at all times and not saying like of course like don't go to a charity event and get hammered like I'm not saying that I'm just saying like when you're not able to feel as if you can ever go outside without shirt and tie on or you don't feel that you can you know get a little loose and have a drink with your friends on the weekend just in case you run into someone that you work with or works at a company that you've dealt with like that I think

[00:02:50] Jessica: That's a little different than keep

[00:02:53] Jacob: Keeping being who you are and being a

[00:02:56] Jessica: Role model it seems like it's kind of a little different of a path yeah I think it's partly like me thinking I need to be a role model but I also think it's everyone asking me to be right but I don't maybe nobody is no but I have nobody's ever really said like do you have this right and you can't be like this like no one's ever said that to me dude it's that thing like we think that we know what everybody's thinking about us at all times like I can't be drunk because I know that if I see Stephanie like I babysat her kid and she's gonna tell Tiffany and it's like these crazy mazes that we create for our reasonings but like now that I'm actually I'm kicking back a little bit further I'm taking a little deeper the

[00:03:35] Jacob: Other thing is like no you didn't where is it you're kicking back a little bit further talking about Society math this is cool stuff that I can edit out yeah yeah so this is like the essence this is like our training to TED talk oh yeah right okay so we were talking about

[00:03:52] Jessica: Wearing masses where we started and we were talking about today about child childhood so disappointment what do you mean by disappointment um I grew up without my dad was not someone who like my dad didn't spank me but really didn't get in trouble a lot because I was a very mindful child for the most part but I my dad I knew when he was upset because he would be disappointed he would never be like angry was heavy right yeah and so I

[00:04:18] Jacob: Think I don't want to disappoint so I don't want it want to work for someone and help them build up their whole life or you know be a the fun part of though whatever however I help them I don't want to be a disappointment to them if they ever found out like hey you helped me through my drug addiction but now I see you out

[00:04:36] Jessica: Here right getting drunk and like you're your C but that's the thing is like because they don't know I mean that

[00:04:44] Jacob: That's thing is like if they walk by you and see that they're like oh great like that person whatever but for all they know like you've had this revelation and you're like you're not an alcoholic or you know whatever like you're actually Jillian joint like you're doing so great you're having a celebration with your friends like they see it as like great you Marty yeah you're

[00:05:01] Jessica: Partying but like that's the thing like it is I think what I'm pointing at is that we don't **** know we never know like we don't ever know what people are really going through but so because of that our defense tactic as like societal beings now is we created a mask like we created here's you need to pretend to be just in case they start thinking some bad things like if you don't want them to think that you're actually this or actually know the real things so let's do this we're stuck in everything in my life is obviously not everything my life's going great and I'm really good at this because that let's leave this one into social media yeah wait pause right there because I didn't hit record on either of the videos I want challenges asked an audio engineer I want challenges like I need to go back to edit like how do I make that sound good yeah because I want like when I create music like looking at the next 60 years of my life I literally want to create music like with my mouth and like I want to go out and take a whole day just sample **** in the environment and like edit it so editing

[00:06:07] Jacob: Sound yeah like being like coming from a

[00:06:10] Jessica: DJ background first and going into audio engineering and like producing ish or whatever the **** it is that I've been doing like I'm able to do like the

[00:06:20] Jacob: Sample thing of like taking other sounds from other people and then making them my own right you know that's cool that's something you really have to know - that's like an ear you have to learn you don't just have it I mean sometimes you do you have a knack for yeah again

[00:06:34] Jessica: You're like trained - yeah I mean that's the thing I think there are some people like just less there's like different species like I was saying I was like we're all completely different yes for him and so we're different like there's some people who do have and maybe are born with like innate talent like that's there's no doubt about it like when a **** kid can play piano at 3 years old is crazy like yeah but it's also our ability to learn at different ages is very different in our ability to like accept new knowledge in order to learn at different ages yes very different so I think talent yes there are many people are born a talent but I'm kind of discovering that you anybody can learn anything the length of the time that it takes you to learn it is just based off of where you are at in life right and a lot of people don't get the opportunity to always adapt because

[00:07:22] Jessica: They're living in an environment yeah exactly like your environment is pretty much **** everything like what our environments are like we want to be like oh I was born like this and like dude even like weight and stuff like are literally people pick up their mom's eating habits like that's this is never out been outside of that they've never stepped outside or looked outside yeah no one's ever told them maybe you should do something different yeah I know and we want it we don't want to say that we're wrong either and so we go up and we live our whole life's and that's what we do now that's who we are and we solidify it by saying my mom did this so I got to do it too cuz genetics right because if we have like a great understanding of how genetics work any of us yeah this theory that like our memories and the way that we were raised like you and I were raised in homes that

[00:08:10] Jacob: Were a little bit different than the typical you know yeah one parent that you were raised in a circus with clowns most of the time yeah monkeys I would

[00:08:20] Jessica: Say monkeys yeah anyway I have a theory

[00:08:26] Jacob: That like we learned to look outside because we had to at a younger age we went through some like I could call

[00:08:35] Jessica: It trauma but I wouldn't I wouldn't identify with my childhood as a traumatic but there were events that caused me to have to learn differently or quicker or about a situation or some

[00:08:46] Jacob: Kind you know any me like a little bit a little too intelligent for my and I learned things that we shouldn't have seen exactly and then I think when it comes to adulthood now I'm thinking those kids are those people who were raised and you know these really crazy environments for a child yeah you

[00:09:03] Jessica: Know this normal whatever it is we were

[00:09:06] Jacob: We're now able to like look outside and and be really way more aware because we've our whole life had to be more aware mm-hmm we can take a childhood

[00:09:15] Jessica: Perspective and inspect it from an adult

[00:09:20] Jacob: Intelligence yeah somehow yeah I mean that's the thing is we make up our own meanings and it's not like we're born knowing what the **** that means yeah like we're I mean we're born with like if we didn't have language like we wouldn't know anything we would be stupid monkeys like we have language as our baseline and then from there we learn like how it is to be and yeah we've adapted just different I

[00:09:50] Jessica: Suppose yeah because there is the

[00:09:54] Jacob: Really unfortunately naive group of our age

[00:10:00] Jessica: People who are naive or who they have

[00:10:02] Jacob: Followed through on this normal path you

[00:10:06] Jessica: Know they've done what they're supposed

[00:10:09] Jacob: To be doing they thought right yeah and they were led by two parents who did the same thing who fell into the same you know I don't know it's I well so I think it's kind of a kind of a stretch but I've actually been thinking about this I think we want blame so much or we want or where we're thinking again we're thinking that the person is going to blame us or what they really mean is that we're bad parents I think what we're actually discovering like with like all this information that our age you and I are able to intake now like we are able to very intelligently discover that like who that the things that happened when we were younger did actually kind of just because we're it's been taken from us but traumatized us right like we like you could be deathly

[00:10:57] Jacob: Afraid of snakes not because you were bitten by a snake when you were two but when you were three and a half there was a guy who kind of like looked at you and weird and you were in a bad mood and he was wearing a snake shirt like that's how delicate our brains really are yeah in like that isn't something that needs blame on like our parents you know how to raise us like what the **** they did they were eating they were just experiencing like the greatest time in their life because they're like addition introducing TV and they're introducing sugar and whatever like they were just living the dream and they're in there we had a religion base still kind of like system of values alright so our parents even if they weren't religious they kind of said like okay here's what we're and teach them wrong and right whatever but like we're discovering now because we're so intelligent now our age people that sounds cocky but like we know a lot yeah

[00:11:42] Jessica: So we now know that all these things that make up who we think we are who we are who we who others think we think we

[00:11:51] Jacob: Are we've **** that up a

[00:11:58] Jessica: Little bit like yeah like we've kind of like **** each other up like we like parents accidentally kind of **** us up we yeah we like kids that are our age

[00:12:08] Jacob: Like there's people that are our

[00:12:11] Jessica: Age that are accidentally maybe **** their kids up now and that's just that's just the way that I talk saying **** up that sounds terrible but they're just like I'm just saying we don't know we don't know and I think that what I'm saying is the things that I've been learning lately and things that you've been learning lately it seems that like

[00:12:29] Jacob: We can be like reprogram like it does

[00:12:32] Jessica: Not anyways fall but we yeah like we're

[00:12:35] Jacob: Life you can be changing as long as you keep active and amazing you know creating those like we talked about earlier creating the connections and the synopsis in your brain are telling you like okay this is okay to learn you know like forget this because this seems to work better don't you think like learning things yeah they're hard but like there's a reason that your body keeps trying or your brain yeah you know

[00:12:58] Jessica: If you choose I guess maybe that's it's the choice you make yeah what learning seems to be like when you stop learning I feel like nobody ever wants to admit that they have stopped learning though and there was a long time where like I would tell you that I've been learning this I'm learning that and I really wasn't much I was just kind of wasting my time on social media or kind of just like

[00:13:17] Jacob: Filling in the blanks with like too much other people's stories and calling that learning yeah other people's opinions are calling out learning now that I'm learning things firsthand and like really diving in like watching lectures and **** like that like I actually feel fulfilled and as if I'm growing and I'm making new neurological connections like I'm actually understanding things that are happening so do you think like not being willing to change must have some adverse effects it so like I think what we're maybe for lack of it les do you think maybe we're waking up to the fact that like I think I want to call this for you I know because I keep yeah lacy

[00:14:06] Jessica: Keeps using that term for me and it's a good time I have these like revelations where I'm like you almost blew your own mind just now the conversation you just had no I know and that's what I'm talking about the essence of that it's what I'm talking about yeah that you your brain continues to be able to grow and yeah all the time yeah but because you've fired that in your brain you've chosen that because your whole life has been a series of that's gonna be hard when that was hard but I got a little bit mm-hmm okay all

[00:14:35] Jacob: The all the times there's got to be a finite number of times that you think your **** world is crumbling down and this is it yeah and you wake up the next day and you're like ah well **** I guess

[00:14:46] Jessica: I got another I did okay like I thought that I did bad but I'm literally still here like there's got to be a finite number of times that can happen before your friend like okay **** I think that maybe that little voice that is telling me to like just stay above water I should listen to that yeah and when follow it when a boat comes along like I should put my **** hand on the side of it and check it out and like investigate yeah like I think I think

[00:15:10] Jacob: That's like a lot of people who you know are speakers and a lot of people who like are able to indicate like the thoughts like this a lot of times they haven't gone through traumatic experiences like because

[00:15:22] Jessica: They've been hit a lot I guess they realized that like oh we're not me we're not right we can be hit and like where I got hit I can actually like say like what is that about not like oh don't look at that ever I can say what is that yeah and then I could look at other people and say hey I have that same **** thing the same thing that the same thing **** hit me like a look at try this and then they can go oh **** and then they could teach their kids and we're like I think it's just I think that's literally how knowledge and growth as humanity is supposed to work but you just took that from like it that was it really cool how I read that I'm

[00:15:56] Jacob: Sorry to hijack it I didn't mean to answer no I'm glad that you said that you literally brought it from like you could have we just had the conversation of how when you learn as a child it's because your

[00:16:07] Jessica: Parents are repeating what they learned

[00:16:08] Jacob: So then you spoke about oh this happened to me and I'm gonna say hey I learned how to take care of this because I saw this once when you're trying to help somebody else who got here precisely meteor you know this what look like yeah it's a hand meaning yeah but you win you win optimist on that where you said like thank you we can use these well I know but you know we can use these same things that we're sitting here saying like this is the challenge this is why we are the way we are you just there was a solution there by having optimism and saying like yeah not only so we can repeat these things but we can repeat these things positively right to encourage change versus to encourage nothing at all you know yeah so yeah so that's funny that's so I think we just did for me as you pointed out the way the way that I found a way out of a hole I guess like literally like so you pointed out that I actually pointed out that I blue printed the way out well you did well I blue painted excuse me the way that you could start to the way

[00:17:16] Jacob: That you chose to end I mean yeah i okay yes I'm sorry I'm still just taking this I'm sorry um the same thing we're talking about like people who have been through like through childhood like maybe like some more rougher it's not like your typical like we didn't have that much crazy stuff go on like that's

[00:17:35] Jessica: Our way of

[00:17:39] Jacob: Lost it no okay I could have found it so I've been okay so by working a lifepro tip instead of saying I lost it

[00:17:47] Jessica: Out loud Mike don't ever say that and just sit with it and sit in silence so I've been watching a lot of monks instead for that yeah I'm not kidding like I've been watching a lot of monks and like meditation guy doesn't stuff and there's times where old me would have been so impatient but now I'm able to sit through and like they're explaining something and they stop for like 15 seconds and like instead of

[00:18:09] Jacob: Saying nope I lost it I think we live except that we have lost it yeah we focus more there's only one spot for this thing

[00:18:17] Jessica: There's nothing one spot for this thing and if we put I lost it in that spot then this definitely goes away yeah so when you say I lost it out loud also I think that once you replace the train of

[00:18:27] Jacob: Thought to your subconscious unconscious I want to say unconscious but your subconscious feelings of

[00:18:36] Jessica: They're judging me yeah oh god if I

[00:18:40] Jacob: Don't make this like awkward hmm I usually go when I get a word and that

[00:18:46] Jessica: That outward is like of course I lost the thought you just completely changed your train of thought to maybe finding this other like what you were speaking about to this topic of like don't judge me because I can't think of what I'm saying because I'm not perfect

[00:19:00] Jacob: Yeah so the second that we think that we don't know who we are and we think that the second that we allow our

[00:19:09] Jessica: Thoughts to convince us we know the

[00:19:12] Jacob: Other person's thoughts yes we lose our

[00:19:15] Jessica: Own thoughts so we give away our own

[00:19:18] Jacob: Thoughts just by letting them go yeah well it's part of like what we learned we learn like if you make a mistake you must immediately correct it there is no sitting on your mistakes and figuring them out it's immediately you need to be correcting us because that's how you reprimanded a kid touches the stove and you say like no yeah there's fear

[00:19:37] Jessica: Immediately because you just got yelled yeah and it was seemed angry and now you're sure you're conveying these angry emotions right and so now I need to make

[00:19:46] Jacob: Sure that I change that mistake that's

[00:19:49] Jessica: Instinctual but it's also like yeah we were we grew up with those like fix that don't do that yeah rather than like we grew up like with them constantly acting on their instincts right not and Because I said so yeah so that's something that uh but my sister says out says a lot because I said so and so I've been trying in my search so in my search to understand like my own mind I realized that a lot of people are like this but me especially I have to have my end goal I have to know my why or the order of Things that I do in the middle gets really **** messy and organ unorganized yeah stressful so like if I don't know why I'm doing things so if someone tells me I was in a difficult kid growing up but I've always been different I didn't understand things because when someone says because I said so I say that means nothing but

[00:20:42] Jacob: Yeah that makes no sense so how can I possibly follow that or do exactly what you want me to do because you said so like who are you who gave you like what are you yeah like so I have to know the

[00:20:54] Jessica: The why I think it I personally I think it was a respect thing for a really long time because again in religion most religions and just most of

[00:21:03] Jacob: Society you respect your elders and that's a cultural thing by decades I'm sure hundreds of decades it's a you know you have to be have that respect and I think that our parents especially grew up respecting their parents who really respected their parents a lot of that age group is that way and so I think that we were

[00:21:22] Jessica: Thinking less now if you if you go into a school and I you know an example would be me as a sub saying to the kids because I said so mm-hmm and they're they're in a world now where they can say well who are you to say so right so they're longer about respect yeah the ground of that like the ground of communicating what needs to be communicated to our younger people is now shaky right because that's taken from us like the trust so an old person can't like it in a small community let's say 150 people if an elderly person comes up to you and you're five years old and he says hey like there's a storm coming we need to go inside here's this is the most important thing in your life right now tell your parent tell her sister tell your mom to go inside there's the storm you say okay of course you're not the person to much do ya but now anybody is allowed to do anything in

[00:22:13] Jacob: Like we have a weird like communism it's not about but we have this weird new thing in it anybody has a voice yeah

[00:22:20] Jessica: We're all pretend leaders in we're in a

[00:22:25] Jacob: Westernized culture has adapted to it's

[00:22:28] Jessica: Turned on itself

[00:22:29] Jacob: Yeah it's a little bit dangerous everyone's a leader you know in it there's always been that don't be a leader right or don't fall and I was

[00:22:38] Jessica: Like yeah I'll be there **** that there

[00:22:43] Jacob: How many times in this like growing up can you remember seeing a sign that said don't be a follower be a leader what lead or whatever so there yes sir but what if followers heard that and they think that they're leaders right see that's the thing yeah people you're not leaders and this

[00:23:03] Jessica: Is my last podcast cuz I don't think I'm really a later I'm just trying to wear a mask and follow my intuition but here we go I actually wrote something this my

[00:23:17] Jacob: Plugins again this is an excerpt from

[00:23:36] Jessica: Just like my stockpile of writing like I don't know articles or something but it's not the full thing it's just like an add-on to things of this same it's it's about talking about like society and ego and stuff and the ability to see things outside of ourselves is where all of our understanding and what it means to be human lives the overexpression of the ego in our culture is crumbling many of the pillars that most Americans still cling to the Internet has hijacked the human brain and been used as an accidental weapon causes targeted at information based avatar sides of our actual selves have gripped us in tribalistic communities have found ways through the connections of the internet to reach out into the real world a man with a microphone can

[00:24:19] Jacob: Arms and wings of evil to fulfill his plan a man with a story can reach the weak-hearted the broken the unknowingly broken they easily misguided the children the adults the Senators the good people the bad a man with something to say can change the course of history what a power to withhold no one man should have all that power a great storyteller once said it is the second commandment of being human knowing your duties to be truthful knowing your power to take the first linguistic commandment of what we have all decided together means everything and use it wisely to not lie to not stand on any Rock and declare it as more yours than it is everyone else's we are

[00:24:59] Jessica: Of this earth we share this earth this thing here is equally ours we are fools to not attempt a coinciding way of life together that benefits the ground that pushed back up at us the leader in the follower are a yin and a yang of our

[00:25:13] Jacob: Society the ability to have an instant megaphone has begun to dissolve both the heart of the man on stage or at all rock

[00:25:21] Jessica: And it's yang the audience the pride

[00:25:23] Jacob: Below the ability to reach through

[00:25:27] Jessica: Nobility sorry the ability through to the ability though to other pieces of the world is a godly power the ability to reach through to other pieces of the world as a godly power to connect the world is perhaps one of the most beautiful things that I could dream of being a part of in my generation the skyrocket of information and knowledge that can now be instantly shared is not merely extra Sun and extra watering to a

[00:25:52] Jacob: Plant but suddenly the ability for a plant to suddenly transport itself across the entire world physically while

[00:26:00] Jessica: Deep in its original roots with each noble connection a smaller large seed of beauty is planted or sprouted with each reincarnation of uncle Scar that stands upon Pride Rock also the yang of beauties Yin Singh seed is planted how dare you claim to be Mufasa when you are merely a plant a great storyteller knows growth and observation a great storyteller practices in private what he preaches in megaphones or open air the ability to have any following makes you a storyteller the great awakening of the internet culture is a step back to realize we have accidentally created an ego avatar world of weeds and dishonest stories to water and strengthen our untrue truths and have one more paragraph through stories around campfires and men standing on tall rock we created a follow a leader commands any follower who doesn't feel they had the strength to go of it alone to fight back and find a way to live in

[00:26:56] Jacob: Some form of best way a leaders role whether the following be to one single little brother or to millions of people the language and agreement we have agreed upon is that a leader does not take his role lightly a man who stands on a rock a man who leans in to express this story around a campfire and be so truthful you can feel the emotion being given a great storyteller is a leader a great man who stands on the tall rock before anyone who may follow has a job you with a voice of any amount of take over follower following you were the voice of any amount of takeover following have a duty and a role an absolute destiny to stand on that rock and truth how dare you take the lives of these people in bait how dare any of us interject what we know more than them into the spots where intuition is now caged in them the role of any leader or any person taking any others amount of time seems very apparent but you as a leader upon this rock still stand nobly you are the symbols of our world for

[00:27:59] Jacob: More perspectively high up rocks I'd nod to you and quickly get back to sorting myself out the butterfly must let go of the caterpillar to be a butterfly you need to learn your cocoon not your butterfly like there's tandon's then you just have to kind of like dude yeah but for me lately it's been great trusting it because I've been able to like oh this actually goes with this chapter I wrote four weeks ago yeah like this I've been writing accidentally about this how to be a great storyteller like somehow this is like some sort of in-depth chapter or maybe eventual book that I'm writing weird that's cool yeah but anyway so yeah so everybody having a platform everybody having platforming strange yeah yes also you led into a little bit of the conversation that I think we should say way into a little bit mmm is the silent right touch the mouth price I'm bummed like normally I'd be thinking about I think about it's okay I'd be bummed it makes me not

[00:29:04] Jessica: Feel so Jeremy anymore around meetings yeah see it's like I don't even try to do that absolutely just in my head well actually it's still prominent but you don't act on it the way that you used to mm-hmm I can see it I'm like oh that's not actually that's not who I want to be because you can choose who you want to be what we're talking about ladies Jones we just cheered our beers here Deschutes fresh-squeezed IPA it's one of favorites please and we cheers in my mouth part touched her mouth part and usually I'm not really I don't like women my mouth fart touch her mouth fart her mouth fart FA RT touched my mouth fa RT no but we just know normally I don't like to touch people are going out people and I in so that's what we were just talking about anyway so we're what

[00:29:55] Jacob: We were thinking we would segue into the difference between we've had this Jake and I really sat down have this conversation multiple times before you and I take a yeah I mean few people know are gonna know or wait what are you asking yeah you can say Jake and I I mean it seems like I've been going by Jacob more now but that just seems like a weird Star Wars thing I made up in my head oh yeah oh yeah actually no it's your world bring your world into mine yeah oh yeah tell me wait Jacob now

[00:30:28] Jessica: We're discussing earlier and quite a bit lately actually the difference between our generation here we are age 27 both of us 27 and we're kind of

[00:30:43] Jacob: Discussing a little bit about when we were young or when we grew up we grew up without technology and then as we've gotten older we've been able to learn it and use it utilize it without being really frustrated by it so there's our parents age they're a little bit older they have only seen the world from relatively most of their life was lived without technology and then they had to kind of grow into it and they're still kind of learning then you take the youth who have you know anybody under the age of like honestly twenty even a little bit older maybe twenty three and yeah really it wasn't much long or much longer you know we started I think I started maybe like third grade learning how to use a computer and that still seemed pretty like yeah we just

[00:31:31] Jessica: Had tired it was only fun for us right like it was it was crazy like it was never like I don't even remember typing like of course it was a class you have to basically Coheed school me and like gonna link typing but like there is still like this is amazing that we're like learning how to use this you learning to use a computer

[00:31:47] Jacob: Yeah well but our old generation only have positive times because we just got introduced new **** like every **** month there's just new stuff and we just got to enjoy the new stuff and then drop it and pick up new stuff and drop it yeah and so and so we I feel

[00:32:01] Jessica: Like we rode the technology like

[00:32:04] Jacob: Let's say like even before yeah so once the Mac came out once the Apple Mac computer came out like we just got to ride the openness of it yeah like we got

[00:32:16] Jessica: Growing and more and doing more like it was it was a we learned at the same I mean not the same rate but we did it as

[00:32:23] Jacob: Technology yeah we like crazy and we got

[00:32:26] Jessica: To grow in it yeah well and that's the thing with technology in the internet they created their own pathway through society instead of like hey I have this thing that I want to present to the world yeah I normally you go to this is a dumb sentence but you go to the president the United States and say hey can you give this out to everybody United States and he would say yep and then he gives it out to every United States like that's how we think the u. s. works yeah like we literally do like the president says okay well yep let's put that in the science books this is true we discovered this so we're gonna make sure that people know this like and just distribute it but the internet cuts through that **** and now we get to learn it like directly like on our own so we learned that we learned a vastly different way than then most every other generation we learned how to go to the doctor's office and sit quietly at the doctor's office without watching right and iPad

[00:33:14] Jacob: But we also learned like now when we want to know something yeah we want to learn something we go immediately to our phones because they're gonna tea or what you know however whatever it is we have we have the ability to know both so we can sit in silence with ourselves yeah hang out there selves and we can respect others and we can do all these things however we are also wildly

[00:33:37] Jessica: Intelligent in the way that we have been able to grow and like we I mean I don't know I guess I'm able to say it 100 times that we've literally grown with technology so we have as we yeah

[00:33:49] Jacob: Humans grew technology kind of like intertwined with us I mean I mean it really is like dude I heard them Duncan Trussell talked about this one time he said this he was like think about technology it started with like it was this building like we would build like one computer would be a **** building you know like and then they're like okay and then we make it a shed yeah and then it gets smaller it's this being that now created itself through our thoughts this is crazy this is not even what we're talking about but it created

[00:34:18] Jessica: This being threw out like it's like oh we could add this with this we can make a look to it we can make fire electricity like humans over time like kind of I think it's not recently just in the history of being humans versus billions of years the third spent life but like create this thing size of a building and they got smaller because we got better we got smarter and then your size was **** and then it got to the point was on our desk yeah like oh no it was even on the ground like on a modem and this is one of yeah and then it's **** a cell phone it's a laptop it's a cell phone this being has made itself smaller and smaller through our thoughts through our creations through the science whatever and then now it's like it's on our wrist it's in our ears it's like so that's what like so what you're saying is I guess intertwine with us like you'd be a fool to not see this as evolution this is like not okay granted that were I'm not hijacking that one yeah I'm aware of what the word

[00:35:10] Jessica: Evolution means I want to be clear that actually just because I think that people throw whatever their meanings on words and say it's absolutely so like I'm gonna talk about the word evolution Mike McGinn yeah it's a new kind of evolution the process

[00:35:21] Jacob: Of evolving is what you're discussing yeah you know without the connotation

[00:35:26] Jessica: That evolution has so what I think that so rounding back to what you're saying I think that we are able like the reason

[00:35:34] Jacob: Why like you know who are we like we're just you know to 27 year olds we were like have this like introspective thought like I really think that the gift that we have for the world is are after a thought of like hey we've lived both these lives like it's not like we're not jaded and biased off of like we've had cell phones our hands since we were two years old we've had both and

[00:35:54] Jessica: Now that like me personally anyway like I was like so sucked into the social media thing like I would literally I would spend 16 hours a day I'm like I would literally always be on it yes so addicted to it and like now that I'm able to remember like it wasn't always like this like and now I'm rediscovering like things that I would I knew as a kid or like just how to observe my surroundings wouldn't be present in the moment like I'm I found presence again and the scary thing is I was so sucked into the social media that I didn't realize that I that presence was taken from me yeah I thought that every second that I was on my phone was literally improving my life yes and maybe even if I thought that to be true and even if it was technically really true just it was it was actually just information and what you really need to be doing is enjoying your life and so

[00:36:42] Jacob: Yeah see that's the thing is

[00:36:47] Jessica: Like these kids are experiencing like firsthand where they're not taking a step back like what did I like about that like maybe I like alright I like the color purple in that movie like maybe I like the color purple more maybe I should paint with the color purple like they're not following these like what did I think about that they're just taking in information they're just they're just storage maybe or what if

[00:37:08] Jacob: It's I mean I passive you're passive with these things I am I go from one thought to the next and by the time when I'm on you know I'm done off social media now I'm not lingering on the thought I was lingering on before I got there I'm taking all this information in and I'm not I'm not learning so are you saying it's wasting your time or but the distraction don't you think it also has very real potential to change your mood instantly though like so you saying you walked away you say you wasted five minutes on social media because you're waiting for an elevator yeah me fellow awkward because there's people around you and you don't want talk to because that's your personality and so you pull out your phone you waste five minutes and like yeah that's fine I'll just wait five minutes Wilson to do is stand there on the elevator but like before you know it you're 90 years old in all these five

[00:37:49] Jessica: Minutes thirteen times a day add it up and you're like oh **** I lived my life trying to avoid looking the **** around also that sound is birds in the chimney or bad they may coincide I'm not sure

[00:38:03] Jacob: It's a little freaky in their meeting health real like sometimes all I'll have like some like revolutionary thought I think and they'll go off and I'm like what out like you know and I insert it and my thought is like that's a sign bro that's a great thought write that down and it's probably about like pigeons or something really and they're just pissed okay we're back and we're

[00:38:27] Jessica: Really distracted I don't think so I

[00:38:30] Jacob: Think I know so I've been exploring this like this is the conversation that if there was a third person who was just sitting here like who didn't know it's very well they probably like what do you guys like you're so weird but like once you get to know us like these are the in-depth thought the conversations that we have and this is a dorky ass sentence but these are this is literally a real conversation in the other conversations that the social media age the Internet age led us to honestly this **** never happens anymore like we're mesmerized by this real conversation like hey let's take these thoughts and just follow them because it's our right to like we're mesmerized by it like as listeners because we haven't experienced it for years oh it's so wild and you know what's crazy is how many times do you say I hate the small talk that's

[00:39:19] Jessica: Something that I that's exactly how I

[00:39:21] Jacob: Would explain it is like mmm nobody has real conversations but then I do I the older I get the more you know I'm closer to a lot of people who might my closest

[00:39:30] Jessica: Core of friends I can have conversations

[00:39:34] Jacob: With perhaps I'm sorry to do really

[00:39:37] Jessica: Perhaps we should define because I think that if I was listening to this one year ago two years ago I not offended but I think that I would say it's not me like of course yeah I would say like I of course I have real conversations I things nobody thinks that they're wrong so what would you when you say when we have these conversations what would you say is the

[00:39:57] Jacob: Difference that are I don't know I guess we're right now we're having a common adult conversations where you can be civil you may disagree you may agree you don't it's not like and I'm not hearing you just preach and I'm saying yeah mm-hmm because I just totally agree with you yeah you're being yourself and you have your own opinions right you're not afraid and we're combining them too and that's the thing about podcast too is like having like such great friends too we can take like your ideas of my own ideas and we can **** an ayahuasca plant them like yeah whatever no I watched you mr. Rogan you take like I guess the ayahuasca plant you take two different plans it's like the vine of one and yeah and they intertwine and that's how you get so it's 5m EOT I think is what it's called and it's actually a biome or something

[00:40:45] Jacob: Something in our stomach and our liver enzymes that when you combine these two plants together it gets through that liver ensign er activates it and you get ayahuasca so the plant ayahuasca if you eat it or whatever it is by itself it doesn't do anything but it has to be come out of this plant which in humans deactivates are activated so can kill you know it makes you have the most profound psychedelic experience ever I told I'm sorry I went on a tangent I didn't tell you what ayahuasca was yeah what does it move on its own is it a **** like well actually you know I had this conversation with my uncle last night about trying different foods and we were talking about and I'd seen this on a documentary and it was in Panama on it so it was when he had brought this up I was like oh my god I've seen this right and he was you know I've never been to Panama obviously but he's explaining his experience and I'm like oh my god I saw a documentary on that nothing he would have said to me had the

[00:41:37] Jacob: Situation been flipped but cool enough that we were able to connect on that it's this plant thing like they take a leaf of a plant and then another leaf and they make it into like a box and they put like nuts and bananas and like all these different types of things and then they put it in hot water they steam it like a steam pot plant whatever it's

[00:41:58] Jacob: Like a porridge it comes out like porridge so they eat out of this plant you know and that's where what is it like the state like it is it sustains itself like you can like reuse this thing where you eat the thing I don't think you either thing I think it's just what they cook it in oh and I think they tie it at the top like they fold it up and then they tie it with like a yarn yo imagine this conversation like before the internet are like before like cultures relieving drove into each other yeah like where it's like when you had been washing your **** clothes in the river for your whole life and then like you hear about like some European chick like no they had this thing where they take plants and they round it like this and they make detergent or whatever they soap or whatever yeah well that's what I was these things are revolutionary though I know I'm figuring it out though so any random pops here that I didn't edit out because I'm learning it's not you it's I am still very experimental with this podcast I'm also an audio engineer who

[00:42:55] Jacob: Learns very hands-on and what that means to me is I have to challenge myself so I literally will purposely shittily set up stuff or do it completely different or completely backwards because I'm trying to figure out what I like and I'm trying to figure out what sounds best so she's hitting it and

[00:43:09] Jessica: It's I know yeah it'll get better over time I could make one for sure promise is that like I don't think I would be perfect but every podcast will be better than the one before like in some form like that maybe that literally means that I moved this little pot filter over two inches that's a victory that's there's a little small things that and that's how you gotta be

[00:43:32] Jacob: Patient with that but anyway so you were you were speaking on Oh a technology again we're back to that yeah I was just saying like um because of my you know my uncle's in his 50s and I'm the age I am how do I said I went to Panama and I was explaining this leaf thing to him he would never been like I saw a documentary like that once or I looked this up or oh yeah I've been researching plants or whatever you know like he wouldn't probably have ever said that because he didn't he didn't grow up where his first instinct is now go to the Internet write this out go learn it this way it's

[00:44:09] Jessica: It's well what do I have in my brain already that my parents taught me that

[00:44:14] Jacob: You know life taught me because we feel like we need that so do you think do you think it's because we feel so equal at every single conversation that we need to pull our level of understanding of what we're talking about no matter what it is I think I can for me personally I

[00:44:32] Jessica: Would think I don't know that I've want

[00:44:35] Jacob: To know that so let me go research it let me you know because then the next conversation that I go to whereas something like that comes up oh my god I have knowledge on this right okay so we just pull knowledge from different areas than our yeah in so and so that and then so a lot of times we take that and then we get caught in this wet web right here

[00:44:55] Jacob: Is where we caught a web you and her uncle didn't get caught the web you talked about this it was wonderful but a web of what most of us get caught in now is well what I know is different from what you know what I learned on this documentary seems to be different than what you're telling me firsthand and like the first-hand person even though they went 20 years ago they may not realize that it's changed a lot in 20 years as the world has and so there may they may argue so there's gonna be a web here and by wet I mean human created drama let's say so we're gonna create this web of disagreement that's an age gap misunderstanding yeah misunderstood oh yeah even the I'm not saying these are intentional things we're just saying like the way that we've accidentally trained our brains to be with social media but yeah I think yeah being able to connect with more people really does mean I couldn't talk to you about Zimbabwe before I watched a documentary on Zimbabwe so this person on their couch now knows a decent amount of things of this person who went there actually knows but there they are different they can't be like first-hand

[00:45:53] Jacob: Experience really is different like we have to learn nice of you so I'm sort of like defining why I wouldn't be first and experience is always better because I've travelled a decent amount and I

[00:46:04] Jessica: Feel like I still couldn't tell you a

[00:46:08] Jacob: Whole lot about Paris France mm-hmm I could tell you what I did while I was there one little insignificant human in this huge giant City with all this history I could tell you the little bit that I no from my experience there about some things but I'm somebody else might have like watched a 12-minute documentary and learn more facts and information yeah and so that's like who can we say is right and wrong that's the thing is we get so caught up on like well who's right then like what is in Bob way really I can't and it's like perspective did you we forget we forget that we're **** different in like there doesn't have to be a right and a wrong in every situation and that likes that sentence like crumbles the way people think yeah but it I'm telling you like it has to like it's okay like it is okay yeah like

[00:46:57] Jessica: You can be completely a different person

[00:46:59] Jacob: Yeah they were installed in you as

[00:47:03] Jessica: Robots this podcast is about robots

[00:47:06] Jacob: Microsoft down with Microsoft I want to

[00:47:14] Jessica: Be cocky and say that I know of it I honestly don't I know it's Apple stuff yeah I don't know I'm thinking of like kind of like I can think of like Windows 98 I think was the first thing that I had on my computer before 98 that's when we finally were able to afford a computer I think my dad was like fairly nerdy when we were younger I remember we had like before a lot of other people had games and we had like computer games I would play like a need for speed with little toggles I love like remembering these memories that I thought that I lost no no it was like need for like on the computer like a racing game we're

[00:47:46] Jacob: Like I don't know I don't know it

[00:47:49] Jessica: Doesn't really matter yeah Frogger did

[00:47:54] Jacob: You play Frogger like on like I know it seems like a pinball would you play Frogger what's your primary Frogger like it was like a game console or an arcade with a computer oh the computer on the computer Mima that's crazy we grew up like you know within 10 miles of each other a whole life yeah or you know 20 miles and

[00:48:12] Jessica: I've never played Frogger on the computer I don't think really well we never had we had a an old school Nintendo and then I think we were able to get it like Nintendo 64 we I mean we were like oh yeah brother we didn't we didn't have a lot of gaming stuff we really didn't have a whole lot of stuff we had we had like the basic necessities and we ate we I mean oh **** I had a cool child at though cuz I was outside

[00:48:33] Jacob: Right yeah so okay so explain so where we're at we're getting so comfortably sidetracked I just want to keep it like I don't really need essence people find essence in everybody so where we're at now is Castle Rock and that's where I live now so Jessica and I met after high

[00:48:51] Jessica: School yeah but we grew up within like kind of like for lack of a better word I didn't play sports but like it let's say rival schools like all the all the high schools in the area are bright yeah that's what we just it's not terrible it's fun but I'm it's not no yeah we don't hate each other we don't burn each other's stake but so now I live up here like I live like within a half a mile of her where she went to where she grew up and went to high school in this area it's a smaller town like what so let's go and just describe Castle Rock like not from our naive high school perspective which is we were also talking about like it's a beautiful thing to really realize like oh like I belong here too like I am a part of the community like I'm here to like I literally go to the farmers market like I like I have a yard here I wave at people like I am a part of the community not outside of the community who's just some Simone who like there's a gatekeeper telling me what to do so let's from your perspective then

[00:49:49] Jacob: Versus now let's talk about Castle Rock well I mean I well I think I mentioned this earlier but I've always really loved Castle Rock I think it's cute and I think it's so quaint I've always been like oh that's home and it's a home that I've forever been like it was so good to me Castle Rock was so good to me I grew up pretty cool honestly I was given a lot but then I moved thinking like there's more I know there's more and I've moved and then now I come back you know just to kind of like just to hang out with you and I'm like oh my gosh we say this every time we walk I'm always like it's so cute mm-hmm because the community members have really made it what it is yeah it's a very it's a nice

[00:50:25] Jessica: Little town and forever it's been oh

[00:50:28] Jacob: I mean it was such a classic it was classic too you know like the all of the

[00:50:33] Jessica: Coaches were pretty much either dads or like long-standing teachers of course you probably knew who they were and who their kids were kids were and you knew everyone in your class like you know sometimes Tyler will say like he didn't know I think I went to high school and I'm like I knew every single person and if there was a new person I was like oh I don't know that person yeah see so cuz you live what was your graduating class I think like 120

[00:50:55] Jacob: Okay so ours I would say Cal so it's

[00:50:58] Jessica: Probably the biggest of the you know four five schools in the area within a 20-mile radius you know the high schools I graduate my graduating class 2010 in Kelso

[00:51:08] Jacob: Washington was 500 or so yeah it was pretty dang big like it was in a you know I think I'll double-check that because but it was definitely a lot over at easily yeah but it's so funny to think like so you literally had an entirely right next to me like

[00:51:23] Jessica: Right up here like literally we would think of each other as rivals in a weird joking way like we wouldn't realize you know we would live our like our interaction wouldn't be like hey we know we're playing this rivalry game but like it's pretty great to meet you later in life like no literally we would say like that **** we're in the color that's not my school yeah

[00:51:41] Jacob: So it's very it's very fun you know in to really let yourself play on that like it was kind of silly the way that I thought of things like this versus back then because I grew up with this thought that everyone here knew everyone and everyone either worked at the mill or whatever and then you and Shay Lee and Megan who moved here and I was like yeah collaboration yeah of my friends who I met collaboration I love that way it's usually collaboration with like your friends moving to your hometown is so no because it really is real because that you're part of me that you guys like knit look you guys know me now but like when you guys first moved here I was like oh my god they're gonna understand like some of where I came from and you do you go you know you know you the people that are at the gas stations all right the grocery store you know they are you see yeah dude you know it's

[00:52:36] Jessica: So funny though is as when you live in the same small town everybody else starts to grow too so the people live in the gas station right here like right next to my house one of the ladies cut

[00:52:47] Jacob: My hair like the whole time I was growing up yeah I can tell so and then the other lady the whole time I worked at the mall like since I was 16 years old she worked at cool scoops or whatever it was like she worked at one of the stores in the mall the whole then I worked there too and so like we have all three like moved from our lives and it's funny that seems like such a simple like well duh doo people move all around all the time but when you really can take an outro perspective and look at like oh wow it really is cool to see that you know I kind of bagged on this place when I was younger just based off of my own childish tendencies of here's who I am versus who they're yeah well in me too Castle Rock was very uh I mean use the word redneck yeah and so that was actually a lot of people it's very offensive apparently so yeah so I actually had a lady on a plane ride who like explained she wasn't offended but she did explain to me like you maybe and maybe a little more careful with that word which I'm not gonna let people take away

[00:53:40] Jacob: Yeah it was my explaining of it was like the people with rednecks were working all day but the banks were there's some sort of the banks who were creating more

[00:53:51] Jessica: Work for them just to give them I'm talking about you look up the word redneck but anyway people were but I

[00:53:59] Jacob: Think we're also yeah I think we're a

[00:54:02] Jessica: Very like long time we probably were able to be like call me a redneck right well no and that's how people wear redneck shirts like they're proud to be a redneck but like so me like it's funny because me like I literally worked in lumber mill after high school I mean I there was five years of working lumber mill like it so me who I thought I was who I was like no I'm a skateboarder which literally skateboarders like in my Celso skateboarders versus rednecks was like a thing like it was like a cliche like we literally would fight like we had to have literally been jumped beat up by rednecks like literally it was like a thing that grew up and so it's cool saying like oh it's not just the

[00:54:45] Jessica: Whole town is rednecks like what does that mean it was just like there was a couple **** kids that I threw this entire town this entire everyone around them I just assumed and they all sucked yeah but and it's something that I held on to without knowing I held on to it's not like I walked around like literally just like I would talk to everybody and whenever but until more recently I was able to actually see where I'm at in Castle Rock yeah like oh I'm part of the community like and I'm not a redneck and like yeah and redneck is a term you have in high school when you're just like subjectively or not able to subjectively see yourself outside as much as they the actual yeah I think for

[00:55:22] Jacob: Yourself we only thought so much so what about this age growing up now like they're like or they're not able to think for themselves anymore like that's scary to me like the Internet I wish

[00:55:35] Jessica: This video as it was this radio station and they were all having a conversation and when I say I think it's Breakfast Club yeah yes yeah Charlemagne do I think yeah out in California

[00:55:46] Jacob: Right I want to say yeah I see yeah

[00:55:49] Jessica: They're probably anyway it's not really really good that doesn't actually matter but anyway they were having the discussion about and this was like well when you sent me that I was substituting like nearly every day of the week so I was with middle school students nearly every day all on their phone addicted their phone only talking about things on social media their every

[00:56:14] Jacob: Like conversation that they had some

[00:56:17] Jessica: Kind of like social media innuendo or

[00:56:20] Jacob: Mmm-hmm fries or something I mean I was like seeing it almost disbelieving like wow these people are really living this way but in that conversation that they

[00:56:30] Jessica: Were having they were saying kids do not get the like time to them good move it move it a little bit lower it's at my hands okay why can't see your mouth either no that's fine that's totally fine like if it takes up a little bit that's right keep going okay see your social teacher so no I'm thinking they don't get time to themselves cuz when they're at home and they say I'm gonna go be alone in my room they are alone physically but they're on their phones they're on their iPads there is zero time for them to write yeah literally when we were young we actually had that time you do you have to go to your room you can't even if you're playing with your toys you're still like you're using

[00:57:10] Jacob: Your imagination you're creating a world

[00:57:13] Jessica: From your whatever we make whatever you call soul or your inner God or your intuition like whatever that is that is shut down when you're with someone at all times like even codependent people well that's what I'm thinking we're creating that's the trouble we're creating that bye you're busy here so you're not thinking you're not thinking for yourself you are literally busy on your phone thinking wow I see that christina has posted this and I see that joseline posted this oh my gosh look at this boy that's so cute because he whatever 450 likes but they're not they're not going home at the end of the day and sitting down saying I like to do

[00:57:53] Jacob: This I don't create this they're going home and do you know I mean ya know exactly like lack of well in there people are gonna see it as a bad thing they're gonna say like of course okay like yeah sure that's what I do like whatever like it's because I have this in blah I'm they're gonna justify so whatever people may be saying after the sentence is a justification of getting our dopamine fix like getting our getting our little red dot like that I mean like all the science on this stuff is like the science is apparent like you've we've all heard it we all know like social media is bad for us like all that stuff like but it's changing who we are and it's like as someone our age we were able to see again both and now we have this like me anyway and of course you we have this

[00:58:37] Jessica: Introspective thing of okay **** we're now in this third stage of our lives like these up these kids now had one stage of life and they're still in it and we actually are on our third now we had our childhood before technology and we knew what life was like yeah we had the present moment like we even had like I had a very traumatic childhood but I still knew like I had life and I liked myself and I was very fun guy like yeah like I felt as if I knew who I was and what I liked and whatever exactly like they weren't inserted I was able to hang out with myself and I was I prided myself on hanging out myself like I actually have always loved solitude but so then the internet came around and like it started out as fun games and it's real fun and then we get older and then it's like I said it yeah and there's our whole life's and then so we live this life of before technology and then we live this life of we didn't really take a step back until right now but I was on that thing like four hours

[00:59:33] Jacob: A day addiction so here's the thing what I want to get at is that the addiction that we have to our phones due to all this **** that we can't seem to quit is not our fault it doesn't have to be anybody's fault we're not looking for like the government is against just like this is something that this is actually at a very incredible time like this is this is something that this is the seriously and evolution the Internet is this is up here with the Industrial like this is a industrial revolution of sorts yeah but it's something new like it's not even it's not need this one category it's not like it's like here's how these answers fit on the constitution you know the United States it's like no this is something else we need rules somewhere else for this so from our third let's say we're in our third stage of life now and were able to say like oh **** you kids are stuck in where we were at in our second but since when we when we were at our first we know what it should

[01:00:30] Jacob: Be like what it was like we know what beauty was when we're at our first stage of life or technology yeah fun yeah in creating being alone in creating from your brain your gut your intuition following your gut knowing like what really makes you happy not what you think is going to make you happy because these rules are other people said it's gonna be copy like so I think I guess just to summarize what I'm

[01:00:54] Jessica: Trying to say is it feels like people like you and me like people who are out to save the **** world or whatever we can I guess yeah it feels like our duty to point out in any way we can not

[01:01:06] Jacob: To hurt these kids feelings or tell them that they're wrong but say like hey we're realizing I'm so sorry it's so late but like we're realizing like what you guys are doing with your phones and what we accidentally said was okay it's **** you up it's like I'm so sorry yeah I know a ton yeah I'm not okay so I'm telling if that's a naive thing like I research this **** so much constantly but one thing I wanted to make sure that I do on my podcast is not just blurt out random facts because it's like oh and I know that this many percentage of this money because like there's so much subjectivity about that and that is not how actual things are solved all I know is my intuitive like I I think in depth about my own thought for very long times during the day like

[01:01:55] Jessica: I'm giving my opinion open to discussion I'm not gonna say here and argue with anybody but like I want this is I come up with a lot of ideals and then I don't

[01:02:09] Jacob: Or that I have a good decent understanding yeah and so that's the thing though and if there's an open discussion for like heck yeah but like it is not worth arguing we're not saying we're right or wrong we're saying like hey like here's what I think and it seems pretty real like what do you think about that like let's not say like well what if the scientist said because this is something different yes it's not this is this is so we're evolutionary changing and when we think of evolution we think of growing **** tails and then we used to be able to hunch back and now we can walk like we think of evolution from the monkey picture dude like evolution is happening

[01:02:42] Jessica: In our brain is like we're not following our intuitions of who we think we are any longer we're doing literally like escapades of like images of who we like this seems like what I should like right and we follow that and that's what we're saying like our age people it seems like our duty of sorts to help the young people be like hey where you going through now sucks did this anxiety these all these things that you're feeling because these things that you they're real they're real and I felt them because I try to kill not try to kill myself but like was very close yeah like I want to be so honest with people just not just to be like oh I'm an honest guy like and that you're gonna listen because I'm just so hard-hitting honest but like it's like no this is just a literally normal conversation yeah this is conversation not that you

[01:03:30] Jacob: Should be talking about these things yes yeah and I'm telling you and if you just open up the conversation with you and your friends to talk about these things you'll be surprised like I don't wanna say should be so I should just say but

[01:03:46] Jessica: Spending time with yourself and

[01:03:49] Jacob: Conversating real conversation so okay what is a real conversation so let's say let's make a list of things that will in this conversation what is not a real conversation what does something that doesn't really benefit you much and how do you ever have a conversation that does benefit you what's the line

[01:04:06] Jessica: If you say here's where it starts

[01:04:08] Jacob: Okay how are you good that is not a

[01:04:13] Jessica: Conversation okay but we need we need to room for small talk though like small talk is very different we haven't figured out how the **** okay wait maybe wait hold on hold on maybe we don't need to room for small talk maybe we're still trying to accommodate a system that's **** up so maybe when you come over to my house and I'm not kidding like maybe when you come in my house I'm like hey Jess how are you instead of saying that I literally like

[01:04:42] Jacob: Yeah like I instantly like or maybe

[01:04:45] Jessica: Maybe I look you right now I make a point to look you right in the eyes and I give you a hug let's say I love you for four seconds like it so maybe I do that you've been tense steering no I'm okay no I know I know it's how the tense but like really think about like so like when my bro's come over here like it's this authentic like you can see it like if I look back in these videos you can see like oh like that's gonna cool like I heard my buddy like very like I was very in that moment like yeah I do love him very much honestly actually men do that yeah often

[01:05:13] Jacob: Without realizing it when they like when you guys grab hands and you like do this weird like one-armed hug yeah well I mean serotonin release it's a yeah

[01:05:22] Jessica: That's a cool thing that most men would never acknowledge they have a feeling involved it's just like that's my bro it's like bro you're hugging each other okay like not even girls when they see each other just like Shailene I was like hi do you okay so they're like girls are robbing themselves and then of good ol **** serotonin mana or oxytocin maybe the same thing that we get dopamine when it's like a reward so we hear a ding and Reiko we get something now we just heard that the bell would get it we get a treat so that's what do the ding is our dopamine but I believe it's serotonin someone could double check we have written on the wall somewhere can't read it but so

[01:06:02] Jacob: Sick the serotonin is like literally when you touch someone so like I've read a book it was a one that another simon

[01:06:09] Jessica: Sinek book but he was talking about the handshake like your gut feeling like trusting your intuition which like nowadays kids probably have no idea what that even mean right um like when you go to do a

[01:06:21] Jacob: Deal a business deal and you're like all right let's sign the **** and he says okay any signs that means a you sure and sign it and you're like shake on it and he says no and he's like

[01:06:30] Jessica: No I've got time like let's just go and sign it you have this gut feeling I'm shaking so when you shake a hands with another human you're saying like I trust you like I know that we're crazy and like I know that you could murder me at any time technically like that's not worth another thing but that's really the depth of what we're thinking I know that we have these crazy tendencies you have crazy thoughts just how I have crazy thoughts but damn it I trust you to do what's right I trust you to do what this paper says and so when you don't have this so touching another human releases I think it's serotonin or oxytocin maybe in it's an actual

[01:07:04] Jacob: Thing like even a fist bump when you touch someone so I kind of wonder all these little bit long-term effects that we're not gonna look at maybe scientists aren't looking at it for another 10 years but like after social media what our world looks like so girls because you guys are so not you

[01:07:18] Jessica: This sells terrible girls not touching each other as much as guys yeah this sounds terrible no guys hug each other and girls as being awkward is what I'm saying like you girls are now like you and Shaylee just missed out on something that me and Tyler get yeah what does that mean all my friends so I don't know if it's maybe just dependent on because I can read Chile's not a very like technically person appreciate yeah well actually Tyler and

[01:07:46] Jacob: I aren't super touchy-feely either but that's like my best friend see but that's weird because I think that the Tyler is really touchy-feely but maybe that's just like because I'm a female you know I mean he like really it's an endearing thing for me but you notice every time he touches you yeah of course because I'm well so that's something

[01:08:03] Jessica: That like that yeah I'm just pointing yeah I guess this is really a chemical that is released and everybody's like we forget that why we do things and the things that we think are actually chemicals yeah so when you touch someone else it is releasing a chemical in your body and we'd like it we have addiction stores it and we have like why the **** would we you not do what we want to like yeah but that I mean that's how it is you know like if I go see my family

[01:08:23] Jacob: Yesterday for example I gave out 25 hugs as soon as I walked to the door because I was just like elated to see them and then I also was can to them and same thing when I leave but I do overtime you know my girlfriend's that I lived with in Arizona we I don't even remember if we used to hug you're not but we hug all the time now we're always you know the more comfortable our friend group has all of us have really rippled that outward I think yeah we are we are very hugging friend group yeah it seems like I grew up with that very like comforting and so I think for me I've carried that on and like a cool because

[01:08:57] Jacob: I love when people I do library well you know yeah but you're letting done I mean if you really think about it from our it's the opposite of our primitive being like another man who could like again like I'm not that we're always thinking fight or flight but like Tyler could **** murder me yeah like I'm opening my heart to his heart when we hug each other and like he could instantly stab me like the typical movie scene we've seen of just stabbing in the side there so letting down fighting that like primitive like but so yeah exactly

[01:09:26] Jessica: Like it's something so anyway life protip real quick is to hug your bros and hug your girls do you need a hug go get one right now 1-800 hugs I

[01:09:40] Jacob: Don't know we get pulled from YouTube

[01:09:42] Jessica: For funding a good site on porn or

[01:09:45] Jacob: Something um so let's just link back to yeah I think it's pretty important to emphasize the difference that social media like and we're not we're not attacking social media we're not attacking but you use a social media we're both have all I view social media a lot like we didn't I didn't personally right yeah but you've narrowed it down was there a while where you had 130 people 29 and I remember thinking yeah and not to say that those people but do I want to be your friend every damn day well no I mean here's the thing though is we forget our capabilities like we don't want to admit when we're wrong in this stems from that process it stems to we don't want to admit that we can't **** handle that much information all day like we only have let's say we only have a hundred slots from memory good stuff in our day 24 hours you've got a hundred slots for memory good stuff I'm Dean a lot yeah I'm gonna copyright memory good stuff that's a lot and that you wake up and you get on your phone and all of a sudden you got six of

[01:10:52] Jacob: Those **** memory spots taken up because you laid on the phone for half yeah and so those things when you

[01:10:57] Jessica: Wake up they whether you like them or not like whether it's whether this is on reddit whether this is on YouTube whether this is on social media like even if these are good apps texting

[01:11:10] Jacob: Is sport emailing yeah dude it you

[01:11:13] Jessica: Insert in your whole day whatever you

[01:11:18] Jacob: Woke up exactly yeah you're exactly right and so really and this isn't just

[01:11:22] Jessica: Like some fancy thing this is really you can simplify your day like this is like okay so then you wake up and you go and you get coffee and you take a pee and that's one more slot okay and I got seven slots filled up and then you I gotta poop so you go to the bathroom after you just peed and hit any poop and as you're pooping you're on social media again or you're now checking your other apps or now your whatever and so well that's eight and then before you even leave your house you have 8 out of 100 things taken up and also those things probably before you even get in the shower oh god yeah shower I do yoga or

[01:11:55] Jacob: Shower I don't yeah I've always been a morning shower but I've been lately I've been because I want to push it against my edges I've been like I'll go a whole day without showering it's crazy for you

[01:12:10] Jessica: But yeah so I think but anyway so waking up around social media or around other outside influences to where you're not alone this is I guess like the importance of being alone and being able to think through your thoughts like is taken away like you only have so many

[01:12:27] Jacob: Out of your 100 thought slots thoughts

[01:12:30] Jessica: What thoughts have you hundred thoughts lots you have like a lot of them are supposed to be for you like there's something like the days that I feel my best mentally mental health wise are honestly like where 90% of those

[01:12:47] Jacob: Thoughts were me and the other 5% are like had a good common with my mom who's living with us for a little bit or than the other 5% is like one percent hanging on the cat because I made sure to make time with this cat that I'd I don't like but I want to like it and then chaley you know I only get her four percent I guess but no like you got to realize your day I was just think about yesterday I was hanging out and I we just had fun it was like I mean my I mean most of the time it's by myself I guess I cuz this is my work from home process is I wake up and I'll

[01:13:21] Jessica: Have casual conversations the morning if my mom or Shaylee awake but most I'm there and if they are yeah I put headphones in and I go outside and I meditate within 20 minutes of being awake yeah and so for the rest of the day they don't really I don't really talk to them because I'm just they know that I'm in like a place yeah there's a

[01:13:38] Jacob: Little bit it's like going to work yeah I mean that's what it is so okay so and that's another thing too like the

[01:13:46] Jessica: The new world this sounds like a loom daughter's a lad and go see it is

[01:13:54] Jacob: Good there's different jobs like mine

[01:13:58] Jessica: Like old people older people let's say let's say even are in our town like older people who have worked at a mill their whole life whatever they are living in different life now than the kids who when they are their age it's gonna be differently that these kids growing up who are now and who we're talking about would say under the age of 20 or whatever 27 whatever they're gonna have a different work life like me I literally smoke weed during the day yeah I'm at home I can eat whenever I want

[01:14:26] Jacob: Yeah my job is a creator like in so as long as I get my deadlines done might get my things done and then you know once a month I fly to a different whatever yeah as long as I show out there it doesn't matter what I do the other three weeks I'm never micromanaged and so like this is an entire world that's gonna grow up only being their

[01:14:45] Jessica: Own bosses right I'm telling you when you are so reliant on other people all these dreams that you want to do and all these all these kids that are like they want to be this and they want to be that and all these things like these things require if you want to be successful at them they require either working with other people in a very well way in which case you need to be mentally intelligent

[01:15:03] Jacob: Or mentally emotionally intelligent yeah Medlen you need to be smart just to work without people mentally emotionally

[01:15:12] Jessica: Intelligent yeah and I truly think from a man who has lived like my life is so exponentially better just in the last year there's every my 26 years of life like and it seems like it's because I'm able to really retreat with myself and sort myself out and I think

[01:15:35] Jacob: To yourself to wait right yeah well and that's the thing is as much as I would say I thought that I was doing that you don't know what you **** think unless you get alone you just talk to yourself like in me I'm a very in-depth intricate like thinker anyway I've always been like that when I was younger that's what I said social media kind of sucked me into this like out here I'm not yeah Who I am like yeah let other people control my thoughts like let other people influence my thoughts I guess and think that's who I am but

[01:16:08] Jessica: Like seeing controlling but yeah we're

[01:16:13] Jacob: Not doing it on purpose yeah we're just living our lives like thinking that we're doing right here I maybe this is different than a lot of people I don't really know I because I'm someone who like I don't like makeup I'm not super into makeup and I'm not super into fashion and I'm not super into like super girly stuff so a lot of the time what I put on Instagram is like oh I felt good today about my right or I really loved this part of my day it was never like it was it was more inward like oh I love this own share this at people versus like I want people to share love with me about how I looked in this photo like obviously I liked it have to let all of you see it right which means I loved it I loved it first and then now you guys you know if you guys like it that's cool huh but I do feel like a lot of the time social media was like telling me in my mind you should learn better makeup you should learn cuter in fashion you should learn how to take better pictures and not nobody was you know again nobody

[01:17:11] Jessica: Was telling just like they're wearing the mask out you know but you felt you had to write I felt not even that I had

[01:17:17] Jacob: To just like if I wanted to make it you know if I wanted to be better on social media it was almost be for me becoming like a I was kind of dulling

[01:17:26] Jessica: Myself and my skills to adapt to what everyone else would like on Instagram exactly but it's crazy because I still was posting the things that I loved I loved I love myself I love my dogs I love ya Tiffany's and my friends but I was moving these like the way I would normally edit right you would spend a lot more time you would over thank them like in the it's not like you were just like completely lying like that there was like I was never completely lying it's like I would showcase like I would paint a jacket in like I would showcase that like I generally like I did paint this like I like doing I didn't paint this for attention but the amount of time that I took to like take a good photo of it and edit it and like **** oh my god anything I think of a caption like yeah and I wonder about

[01:18:09] Jacob: That too oh yeah because you know like

[01:18:15] Jessica: Even God I think back to this is such a funny like back in middle school when I first met Brittany Jennings right and she had like when myspace was just coming out she had the coolest **** myspace and oh she knows so much about this her myspace like everyone was like she knew how to do the underscores in the cross out song I feel like I knew that Brittany had a dope ass like dude I feel like her glitter graphics were off the charts I think she and she took the camera angles her up here like she was the person to unlock that I think she was like the epitome of like you don't know about social media I know about **** social media right a very young age so I remember thinking like yeah but it's things like that were I think certain people have this knack for like I used to want my ice to not care about my Instagram and then I suddenly started being like oh I wanted to be clean all the same color you want as a whole you want it to look good yeah

[01:19:12] Jacob: So I think that part of you know part of me like that was that was what I was addicted to was making it look perfect and because I'm a pianist yes see that's what I love doing like I enjoy the representation of who I'm I say I'm saying I am like it's not even just like here's who I think I am it's like here's like the cover art of

[01:19:36] Jessica: Who I think I am like in that I would always say the highlight reel yeah right but like the thing about that and that's cool like I think there is a general a lot of people have a general understanding I guess that like I know that you also wear sweatpants outside of this like I know that whatever like but we say we know that we say I know but then we see them in person and we're like they're not as how does they wear in social media yeah like these are real things

[01:20:01] Jacob: Like and we joke this **** off like well yeah of course I'm not like I've been drinking like whatever like yeah like whatever you would normally say after that sentence in your friend group in a group message with your friends yeah like that's bad like we're attacking ourselves with comedy in justifying the weird **** that we're doing and like I think we're able to take a step back and look at that now and be like oh **** that's bad don't do that guys so this is a question I held on to a lot because I am very witty and I am very like I'm a smartass and I'm always gonna have something to say always and I don't I don't dislike that I actually really appreciate that about myself that I'm a talker I used to be like I talk too much but I never told myself that I was that what does it even mean like who says that here's the amount that you can talk during the day you're allowed to talk this much around these many people yeah hey you hit your

[01:20:53] Jessica: 69 years show your mouth you've been

[01:20:58] Jacob: Done talking to your dogs dude Talon I talked about this yesterday about how often you talk to the dogs like you have he's like he's like yeah we have full conversations where I don't say anything for 20 minutes things you're just trying to figure out what you think you're not actually trying to so okay so let's get back to that the essence of how great that is Jessica is being able to talk

[01:21:22] Jessica: To herself is how we sort ourselves out right when you're always taking in something you're never able to either organize it or output what you're doing and so people who are always I want to emphasize even lyrical music in your headphones like even

[01:21:38] Jacob: Even movies on in the background like anything that is in putting something that's not like a neutral like let's say like a **** piano or like a fountain sound like sitting in a room by yourself

[01:21:49] Jessica: With no input can you do that can i well I mean not yeah of course you

[01:21:55] Jacob: Can okay I'm saying like as third

[01:21:58] Jessica: Stages here in life like Kenley's like stuck in second stage people like and the thing is they're gonna say no I can't I have anxiety yeah so the thing is so what I've learned more than anything is when you push up against things that you need to change or like you think that like you don't like yeah you so these are these are two things like you are experiencing the human emotion on anxiety right you are not actually your thoughts though so you're also giving worth you got to remember like you're still in your like whatever you're saying out loud there's still like an intuitive you that's in yeah let's talk about that let's I want to talk about the word anxiety because things that in depression have been hijacked by BuzzFeed I think right I

[01:22:45] Jacob: Don't know this is where you going no okay I am thinking about the word

[01:22:50] Jessica: Anxiety itself and how we've given we've given weight to it so maybe this is okay when I was mental health counseling before I moved to middle school I had a lot of like eight-year-old kids it was a weirdly like it was a weird amount of like all of these kids were I think I had like six of them and they were of my first month on the job and I was like

[01:23:14] Jacob: Wow you know the eight-year-olds like I don't know what to talk to them about oh my god like what does an eight-year-old boy honestly that's like my least favorite age I think because they're just so annoying if you're eight years old listening for whatever reason you're **** annoying get it together there's some kids sitting in a car seat still his mom's overprotective but she's listening to our podcast because she does your hair on the weekends or something like kids ask too many questions and they want too much attention they drive me nuts I think we don't actually want the answers

[01:23:46] Jessica: We just want to ask why yeah also you just want to be like watch me do this ballerina turns no you just want attention Parker I don't want to watch you okay so you have six eight year old and we I had a lot of them that and I don't think this is just I mean obviously I worked in a non-profit so we did a lot of state insurance we did a lot of like homelessness foster children that type

[01:24:08] Jacob: Of thing so there's turmoil in the house I do not think for any eight-year-old regardless of the situation I think that most eight-year-olds are probably like having this same feeling because their parents I can tell you that when I

[01:24:21] Jessica: Was sad my dad never said let's talk about you being sad my dad probably did more things like and this isn't like a direct you know this is where we're

[01:24:31] Jacob: Pointing out this these are things that now in this new world this new world we can talk about because it's the things we're looking back say hey we could do this a little bit better everybody not just you there's no faults being pointed here at all he would say you know if I was sad and he didn't know why rather than exploring it and trying to figure out again you know this is my business mindset but here's the challenge here's what we can you know here's the possible things that we could do and then also here's the solution or here's five solutions right honey whatever you think you know let's try him out so rather he would just say do you want a cookie let's go outside do this let's do something fun you want to do he would reward my sadness and he'd you know I didn't any I don't think it was too much that I became spoiled because I we obviously didn't have the means to be spoiled but I lived a very rich life but

[01:25:19] Jessica: I don't ever remember my dad coming to me and vocalizing that word focusing on Oh on a specific feeling or emotion I had and then describing it and then finding a way to get it look cuz how could he possibly do that he doesn't know do that with himself right that's the thing like nothing about against him it's literally just something they've never been taught something that we are forced to think about now yeah but so

[01:25:45] Jacob: Anyway I think moral the story is these

[01:25:47] Jessica: Eight year olds now who I'm helping I they're learning the word anxiety right

[01:25:54] Jacob: They're saying because rather than us

[01:25:58] Jessica: Figuring out how to identify the emotion and then work on it we just say as an all-encompassing word yeah angry or mad or anxiety yeah anger and exactly something you know that I like that it is anxiety and you're experiencing deal we do outright say emotionally I'm feeling a little bit embarrassed because right how many kids are feeling embarrassed at that age yeah good because we don't look in depth of like okay so what are you really feeling because if you just if you sit down **** talk to him instead of just trying to get them away from that feeling and try to hide that feeling push it away if you just sit down and talk to him which granted it's super hard to do there's a lot going on in our world but think you'll get it like so

[01:26:39] Jacob: Why do you feel like it's why are you crying alright where you crying why crying like whatever they get down yeah but yeah

[01:26:49] Jessica: It's so in your job as a parent or an adult or whatever anybody who could influence is say like to point out to them like there you go you silly goose like I don't you have to be mad and they're like oh that's how my emotions were like okay yeah and they don't want

[01:27:05] Jacob: To feel any more than you want them to feel it so if you sit down like okay we'll shoot man let's all right you're eight years old like okay so what do you think oh so what Cynthia said made you mad that seems that probably made me mad too you know you get down to their level and you talk to them and you can you tell them like this is how we work through our emotions but there's nobody get down on the level anymore because there's a very huge disconnection with the young age or no other people like and this is a little even like eight years old versus twenty seven years old like this is even sixteen years old versus fifty-seven yeah if you are let's say younger than thirty you are disconnected as **** then like there's a huge gap yeah it's a twenty-five even two but also like you're disconnected

[01:27:46] Jessica: But you've also been made fully aware of mental health and emotions right because in school you now in the schools now especially they're saying like what color do you identify with if you're red you're angry how do we fix that they're working on that they're doing some social emotional signs which cut I wish they could have when we were young right

[01:28:05] Jacob: Right that's instead you know and then there's people who this kid has a DBE or ADHD whatever we've decided to diagnose him with but the teacher rather

[01:28:14] Jessica: Than saying sit down sit down he asks buddy can you take him for a walk right to do that now yeah who wants a

[01:28:24] Jacob: Distraction you want something and it's you know I get it obviously we can't be taking the kids out 15 times a day because they're distracted because nothing well like Pavlov's Bell you know you write you teach someone to do it and they're gonna do it but I think the essence there is that like we are now we've always known we're very different the way that we learn things like the way that like an ADHD kid it's

[01:28:49] Jessica: Very hard for them to sit next to we're just saying a general ADHD kid whatever that means of your brain sitting next to a kid who is very like a straight-a student a 4.0 like it's very good like literally if we were younger Shaylee sitting next to me like I don't **** learn the same way that she does and also her life is going great and my life has an absolute brushfire at home yeah like in trying to have these two people say hey get the exact same focus and get in this clique get your head in the game right now we're learning **** statistics yeah and you're also sitting there like why do we need to learn it cuz I'm someone who needs to know why I like that said all right I need to know why before I even start these trail you're saying why don't you learn it and they're saying this is what you learn in school and I'm like why do we learn in school what is school and I'm really like trying to figure out like why we're doing any of this your Maslow's

[01:29:39] Jacob: Hierarchy you're going through like I don't have security which messes hierarchy I know I've heard of it what's the s like your most basic needs are like food water shelter right holding maybe as one of you and then once you

[01:29:54] Jessica: Those things are okay in your life right

[01:29:57] Jacob: Then you can move this to the second level yeah in the second level I don't know you know how they go I know the very basic very basic and then the very top is like self identity so you're

[01:30:08] Jessica: Moving from this you can't if you're homeless you cannot go to school and

[01:30:13] Jacob: Focus on or if your parents are fighting

[01:30:15] Jessica: Yeah it's not an option you can't go to school and think I'll just set this out here on this counter when I come into class and I'll learn visit yeah you don't have that ability in your person of the ability right now to teach you because they're causing this terrible thing like they don't want to be doing that holy **** like of course they don't want to make a terrible life for kids but we're accidentally living out the **** that our parents put on us so then you can't you're not able to move to learning and then you're not able to move to this next I wish I could remember what that all the ones I always remember the baton the most basic one because I think social services I've been in it yes so is it like hierarchy

[01:30:54] Jacob: Of needs like we need like so it was for example when we walk into a building we need to trust that whoever the workers were who built the building built it these correct ways it's not going to fall and kill us like we all need trust even that sense like is it like that I mean I guess you could either what we need in order for sighted society to work to live okay so this is before society this is just to survive see yeah so we'll definitely have to look this up because I'm type right I'm trying to explain it so like I'm picturing because it's a triangle so imagine a triangle go over the food triangle yeah we don't **** get me started on the **** food trying wild freak out and a little like columns in it okay so the bottom column it basically is a theory that if you're

[01:31:47] Jessica: Going to you're going to school this is a good example so you're a eight year old boy going to school but your mom and dad just went to jail and you just found your mom dead this is very drastic he's all over again

[01:32:01] Jacob: You found them dead mom dead dad's gone

[01:32:05] Jessica: So you don't have any security anymore or any safety feeling because you're two people you trusted the most mmm-hmm are no longer in your life and then you get moved to somewhere that's not a home you sit in at the Social Services office for eight hours until somebody can come take you some this perspective is all from an eight-year-old perspective this isn't adult thinking this is an eight-year-old trying to understand their life yes okay so then oh my gosh I'm kind of hungry you know as an eight-year-old you don't make food yet yes so you're relying on your parents who are now nowhere to be found cuz your answer how to get food is go to your parents and you don't know it's not there your parents said don't talk to strangers so you don't want to talk to them social service worker or the cop yeah you're sitting in here thinking I'm so hungry oh my gosh I'm so hungry good since well I don't even remember when because my dad went to jail last night when I was so sleeping and I woke up to this so this 8 year olds thinking all these things aren't being done for him so he has no food and no he has a

[01:33:03] Jessica: Shelter but he's still thinking about yeah he doesn't trust it because all he's still in a stranger's place yeah like what is this building I mean what is this my strength my mom my dad my

[01:33:15] Jacob: Security is gone yeah and so basically that's like the most primal thing what do we used to need when we were cavemen per say we needed food shelter and water yeah right so we needed the most basic instincts so if and I use like homelessness as a good example as well if you don't have a home and you don't know where you're staying from night tonight and you don't know if you're gonna be cold or hot or if you're gonna get any food for the next five days you

[01:33:39] Jessica: Do not you cannot start working on the next level of yourself you can't start working on living and I say this for

[01:33:48] Jacob: Substance abuse that's a huge one so if

[01:33:51] Jessica: You're someone who is an addict and you don't you are not set up this is why this theory in Holland or whatever works because they're setting it up with a home they're setting them up with food and water they're setting him up with a job they're literally setting their government is setting them up to be functioning like let's give you this we know that humans need this lowest level of this low tsunami this is the absolute this is what humans need to get themselves to sort it out right if we can yeah we should totally be able to

[01:34:24] Jacob: Give people that right halt in whatever so they did a thing right so this was the place where they did like they open

[01:34:30] Jessica: Up drug facilities like for drug users

[01:34:32] Jacob: Right yeah so which you the products

[01:34:35] Jessica: Been that a little better than I mean those it was it one of the fun ones or one of the not fun ones yeah but they allowed these people to come in and it was I would say it's essentially set up like a social services or a welfare office something along those lines where you come in we can give you a whatever dose you and there that would be we would have a really hard time with that here because who's to say your dose is too high right we'd almost have to start them out with it always we'd almost have to give this a packet built on them like ok we started out with our always 10 milligram or whatever yeah right and I do think they do that they must because

[01:35:18] Jacob: It's just reckless like you 100 are you

[01:35:20] Jessica: Sure he's like yeah bro you have to think about who's gonna who's gonna provide that but that came from their taxes that's something I think that they had decided anyhow they come in and

[01:35:32] Jacob: These people are allowed a daily dose

[01:35:35] Jessica: And I don't know how many times they were allowed in or out or whatever but even if it was one for free this is a lot you go into like this is literally like going into the hospital to a floor they actually you go here so imagine your dignity like if you're drug user like you like you're not going to feel like you're not a piece of society you're gonna feel like a piece of **** scum who has to hide you're not gonna feel like you need to go into an alleyway to meet some sketchy dude who you hate but you have to maintain this relationship with because he's your dealer he literally go into this place and it's white in there's a lady she's 45 and she drives a Mercedes she's friendly to you CD why yeah she Stacey's mom you see what's up with Stacy like hey when I get it together in five months can I talk with Stacy can I hang out with her what no but like you like just the act of that opening up these clinics yes Mike that gives people obviously the stability that they need to like actually start a ground of life again yeah but it also it reminds them that

[01:36:26] Jessica: Like not everybody **** hates them and not everybody sees them is just a piece of dirt on the side of the road like also a home in a way it could be right you're very right that's a good point yeah it's a baseline if all else

[01:36:37] Jacob: Fails you know if all spells in their life they're going to sleep on the front porch of that place right or something yeah so anyways we can handle it there yeah the essence of these places is that they give the lethal dose or you know legal we go I don't know what if they legalized or not regardless they go in and then they also were there to help these people get housing because people don't know like how do you know okay you gotta get your **** together like what does that mean they don't know how to get together like also how many times I

[01:37:07] Jessica: Mean god I felt an application actually I've had enough jobs in my lifetime that I filled out - mm-hmm easily 27 times let's do the same but I've had so many jobs I have filled out so many w-2s and I still to

[01:37:22] Jacob: This day have to ask questions about my

[01:37:25] Jessica: Application resume whatever maybe so you imagine someone who doesn't have my experience trying to fill out their

[01:37:32] Jacob: First application dude yeah like the

[01:37:36] Jessica: Stuff that we're taught in school is not okay well it may be different now but it wasn't super relevant it didn't seem like no you needed to know that canister last time I made a resume before I graduated high school yeah was ninth grade and you know what I was I mean Britney Jennings I were stealing **** cookies we were not in class we're all talking about kids these days they're social media and we're just stealing cookies life got me back but I

[01:38:05] Jacob: Definitely am karma kicks in sorry what what is karma to you I feel like the Instagram Roffe on sale for $7.99

[01:38:14] Jessica: Poster and I'm just saying because I have plenty of those karma yeah like what is karma to you like what was

[01:38:22] Jacob: Karma mean I wouldn't say like oh that

[01:38:25] Jessica: Guy murdered so he got shanked in prison yeah he will be murdered that's yeah it's not I for an i for me for me it's like yo I didn't I did like 15 things wrong in this same one day and then like

[01:38:39] Jacob: Today I accidentally tripped over something it's like life saying like hang on you know think take a minute to maybe

[01:38:46] Jessica: Think about some doing better or it's like little things that just kind of give me the indicator of like see how good this feels when you were a good person and Karma's not always negative for me I think karma a lot of the time is like hey like a reminder how does it feel right now because you just like did this nice thing for someone like sometimes that work no I don't necessarily want to go wipe down the tables for you when you could you can do it yeah but I'm gonna go do it and then I'm gonna be like I'm glad I did that yeah because three minutes well so

[01:39:15] Jacob: That's the thing as is right there that you don't automatic this isn't something like if you wipe out the tables for your coworker you receive a magical gift yes Kharma like no this is something that you need to be intelligent enough to be like I know that this person only has

[01:39:31] Jessica: 100 slots in their day yeah instead of making them take one I'm gonna use one of mine and I'm gonna clean that **** table like for you giving up like girl I got you I'll go clean that table like get like that to me is like so good karma it's

[01:39:44] Jacob: Like you give yourself or allow yourself to open up to that feeling of like I just used one of my hundred slots for Jennifer over here yeah because I know

[01:39:55] Jessica: Cuz I know that Jennifer's happened she has a hundred **** kids ohm in her last rough like I would do little things that would be Instant Karma for me like receiving of karma like I would feel good like and this is an even ego based I would feel good about I literally had a guy that I used to work with that would fall asleep at work and like he would never like in ridiculous ways like he was a hard worker he's a good guy but I also know that like we would be s enough to where he would he has literally four kids or five kids I think and they were adopting two more or something like he was literally dog-tired me fall asleep and it takes me two seconds to just do a little more work I was kind of tired it kept me awake anyway we're like the Karma the thing about Karma the reason why I asked

[01:40:33] Jacob: You what you think about it is the secret of karma that people don't understand is they you give it to yourself yeah like you have to open up so the good karma you have to open up to receive it but bad karma like receives you in ways that you don't know good karma you get to choose bad karma you don't get to choose you choose the bad decisions you made but the way that reacts later on in life it makes your thoughts polluted or whatever yes that's on you and you don't know how it's gonna be so at least if you're gonna choose your karma choose good karma because it feels good you know exactly what it is like something necessarily safe and it's not always predictable but it's like I know that I'm gonna try the best at least make this person feel better I think people use the word blessings also as good karma and then because karma is almost a superstition and because blessing is identified with a religion a lot

[01:41:22] Jessica: More people use the word I think that Karma because I and it doesn't to be good karma like oh yeah I went to the I won the lottery or I went to the right no I got this free thing like good karma is just yeah I think that I think the word car I think that we all have like with our cultures all just being **** clash together with everybody just like connecting so quickly and so indefinitely like our language is kind of being teetered a little bit and it's a little dangerous yeah like words like karma like so we see words like let's say even BuzzFeed words like we see these words and we kind of take the meaning that we've been given and we just alright that's what that is yeah like so we're like if we know literally the word karma like those kids who they never wouldn't learn the word karma in school consciously alias and then they know what karma means based off of one Instagram account they follow and that Instagram account could be like Karma's a **** it's gonna get you yeah you **** if you ding my car you're gonna

[01:42:19] Jessica: Get a car wreck like and people literally walking around as if like this is how the world works like and language is very tricky like we have a lot of slang how that's what people think karma is if people think the word ego mean people think the word ego means like something equally as up to says that people think it means like was when you're really cocky and it's like no that's I could write and I think I don't know if I'm writing it but like there's a book about ego that I could write it seems like I'm writing it every day like trying to explain what the **** ego is to people like the word

[01:42:52] Jacob: Start taken from you say maybe this would be more realistic for us to do is to give an explanation of what's happening and then say this is the word like ass like what are what's the word that's coming to your mind right now hmm what does that mean to you like what

[01:43:09] Jessica: The description is that you're giving

[01:43:11] Jacob: Right the book that you're writing if you said you did not say the word ego in there at all and they have all these descriptions they might come up with a hell of a lot different like dictionary definition what you're writing about not ego yeah see that's think we only have one connection when you as soon as you see the word our brain automatically connects to the most commonly known thought about process right connection so ego Oh cocky see so I think there's a

[01:43:39] Jessica: Huge danger in that we think we know when we're arguing we're not let's just say our left versus our right when we're arguing hardcore as Americans whatever we think we know what each other means we don't I think we're **** talking different that languages that sound similar and we're like so by this you mean this and you're like what the **** are you saying you in it no there's water so it's rain yeah no it's dangerous like it's it's something like so even think back to like my example of like using the word rednecks it's like when I say rednecks like I now know just by talking to learning something new that like there's places in the world where like I shouldn't say rednecks yeah but like us around here it's like very normal so this is the exact same word with multiple meanings and it's not one of these complicated like new slashes kne wi new or night slashes day and night

[01:44:30] Jacob: This **** is new this is we invented

[01:44:35] Jessica: This **** on accident guys dude I'm just saying like the **** that we accidentally invented a clash of languages and we're fighting with in the clash of languages that doesn't need to be there I think that's not a complete thought I should write that more but it's funny cuz like I'm like I wonder like what peer I'm out on yeah I don't think when I'm following whatever it's fun that I love that dude that experience experiments are my favorite I mean I'm I think back to the new canoe

[01:45:15] Jacob: You know Styles it's funny because it but again we created language right so we've created things we have created

[01:45:24] Jessica: These weird topples like we can't think of a new way to put these letters so we're just gonna take some or add some yeah I think we're using it as their baseline like no I mean I mean like I'm not saying that I'm dude I don't know what the **** the answer would be or like what it would possibly mean to create a new language but really we language is being tricked

[01:45:49] Jacob: Upon here because we language the only reason that Ling would exist and that it's all a fluent thing is because we agree that it all means this thing like it's like when I say turd but you know

[01:46:00] Jessica: Exactly what turd but means right but like what if I was like no it's not snow what I mean like if I meant like you're not sitting in a chair that's a table yeah it's like if we had a disagreement on what actual things that are we say facts mean and that's what's **** happening people are saying that's a **** table and you're like that's clearly a chair you idiot here's why I'm gonna stab your family like but this is actually a table because yeah like it's so hard to

[01:46:23] Jacob: Coincide you know actually I would I think I would equate this that kind of covers to the left on the right like the political side I would equate it to a bench and a table so you can have a coffee table then could also double as a bench right but one side is like no absolutely no this is a bench and you sit on it and you definitely don't put food on it like that's not how it goes but then somebody else puts it in front of their couch and they're like this is a table what do you mean this is definitely table I bought this because somebody else labeled it take they devote the rest of their life to arguing about which is right the tape which one's more table II yeah is this actually table or bench I mean is it all of a sudden you

[01:47:01] Jacob: Have Facebook groups that are tables vs. benches right and then you have actual like riots that started as tables where as benches but now they're considered conservatives people cannot even like the table people even though there's like 700 million other things they could like together like hey you know what do you think this is a bench oh well the other things that we the other six hundred nine 9999 things we like about each other mm-hmm oh those go out the window yeah we really love funny dude we

[01:47:27] Jessica: Have a knack for finding one thing we

[01:47:30] Jacob: Disagree with what how does it go more what have YouTube like ripped my **** off like that's clearly so clearly the exact song and key this is a reincarnation you don't have your the rights to sing this song you're so good no it is really we do we have a knack for finding one **** thing that we like there could be like really think about like when someone's like hey this is so-and-so like oh this is new you're the new okay here's a good example you're at your job and you're the senior person you got a co a new person and like at least when we were young showing the new person around you like oh that's Cyndi like be careful she has five kids and she's kind of a grumpy **** like you love Cyndi you like you **** that's your **** you know and I've seen it like but like you

[01:48:23] Jessica: Accidentally pointed out that one little thing like it's this I think the thing is it comes from our primitive self like hey like always keep your guard up a little bit because this person could stab me in the chest real quick like and what we need to be doing is like that's there but we're not going to vocalize it that literally just happen to me what are just new place I got stabbed than Jess yeah damn no I metaphorically Sanchez yes no I walked in and this girl was introducing me to and then the person else is to be training with actually was late like a food is late and so I was like oh I don't know I'm just betraying with whatever I don't know anybody in and beforehand when I was like following this role around getting some stuff setting up for the day she had mentioned like oh yeah you know so-and-so your bartender watch

[01:49:11] Jacob: Out for you yeah you have to get used to her she's kind of a lot first and I'm like you know when it when so then

[01:49:18] Jessica: Preemptively when this person comes in I'm like

[01:49:21] Jacob: Already bracing for like yeah you have

[01:49:24] Jessica: An expectation to an X to an extent

[01:49:27] Jacob: Absolutely was distant at first and very

[01:49:29] Jessica: Like you didn't purposely do this no I didn't her you don't **** train somebody new handed God so you went into this place feeling her burden because that was reminded though thankfully I'm experienced but that's what I'm saying one in like 500 people that you train in

[01:49:48] Jacob: Your life is actually like competent and you don't worry she's like go pick up the table right go wipe the table down yeah so when you're a trainer you're someone who has to consistently train you're like but it's also a very due dates it's a responsibility it's something that you like you taking it lightly means that the rest of the time this person works in this place they have handicaps because of you **** like that's the thing like I get it I totally do because I've trained tons of people know where she was thinking her where her personality was coming from and why this other girl would have said it however yeah I am thankfully intelligent enough emotionally intelligent enough to be like I will fill this out for myself because this girl who told me that seems a little bit I have a very strong self-confidence especially when I walk into a place where I'm like I have done this before so I'm not gonna act like a little like to do generally I'm

[01:50:45] Jessica: Gonna walk in and say all right how can I help you how can I be on your level how can we right so because my personality was a little different than hers I'm like she does not I am not

[01:50:54] Jacob: Intimidated by her like the way yeah it's because that girl was giving you her experience based off of where she's at saying this is an absolute truth it's

[01:51:05] Jessica: Like yeah for a person like you yes that is maybe true that's the one thing you should point out but that's maybe true but and don't get me wrong like I've been in that girl's position before where I was like certainly trained I'm like hey this person you gotta be really touchy with this person make sure you do exactly this and in a restaurant it is helpful to know like this bartender does not want you to pull the tickets this bartender right see but though those are a little bit different those are like okay so but those

[01:51:31] Jacob: Conversations we have all these unspoken words or words that like we can't say even though we're looking each other and it's not saying them I can't work like so these are the kind of conversations that are being buried more and more and more with all this social media thank every thing like all these fickle conversations are coming through to the service surface and they're being the only thing that we talked about so like right what I heard was right yeah

[01:51:56] Jessica: Because really like so say if three months you and this girl constantly butt heads and you're like we really don't same and she thinks like whatever like whatever situation is like do to solve that problem it's gonna be uncomfortable and it's not something we're taught how to do by our parents of course not because they don't do it either which is fine but we need to sit down with them

[01:52:16] Jessica: And say hey we're working together every day and I value my life and I value your life I value your time went by in my time how do we work better together we don't have to be friends how do we repair together and you literally if you can look them in the eye and have that conversation and they're not gonna be like well **** you're dumb **** like as long as you're sitting there like with honesty and you're not trying to attack them like you're not making emotion-based decisions and literally acting out of sincerity of and even if you want to be selfish the root of this conversation is to make your life better because you're grumpy when you go home and your boyfriend's getting kind of sick of you being a **** because you just complain about Tiffany every damn day yeah like so I think it gets it again looping back to what we're saying like what can we what can we tell young kids that are stuck in the second phase of what we went through that's their first and only phase right now how can we help them see things as like oh I can I could be the

[01:53:11] Jessica: One to initiate this graduation how do we give them the strength to give themselves the strength I don't this is something that I think is very like for me still I don't have a solution mmm because I would love to go you know one by one into a classroom and take all of their phones away and all of their social media away and just have like a full day of school where they literally just talk to each other right hang out but it's like it would take months and years of that to retract all of the like

[01:53:40] Jacob: Eat with all the needs and all the

[01:53:44] Jessica: Philosophy the reverses and the fauces

[01:53:46] Jacob: Well yeah it's yeah humans are

[01:53:51] Jessica: We're very mobile and it's actually unfortunate how am I able where like it's sad but like these kids literally don't know that they could be better than what they already know you

[01:54:03] Jacob: Know what not better but no actually better here they could they could do more than they than they think or that they don't think actually it's better I was a **** turd I sucked like it I'm

[01:54:14] Jessica: Not saying like I'm comparing myself to them like it's drastic because I'm older but like I was sucked into the social media thing like literally I had to look at it every single time I got nervous anytime I felt an emotion that was not emotion that I loved I looked under way or I did something that's a byproduct of

[01:54:29] Jacob: Consistently throughout our lives being told to distract yourself mm-hmm well that's what all these kids are experiencing now yeah they're handed an iPad yeah okay and again when I say all these kids it sounds like that like it of course there's not if you can listener if you can listen to this and there's somewhere if you let your guard down sincerely like if there's somewhere where you can back I kind of do hand my kids like if there's somewhere you can apply any of this stuff sort of to your life yeah instead of saying well I'm not that instead of finding the one thing you disagree with and mean like well I don't feel that way so I'm not listening anything Jessica Jake say like I invite you anything in this podcast to find the chunks that equate to you because I want to remind everybody that we're so different we're so different like just because you agree with me doesn't mean you're anything like me you don't you know many times I listen up well we talked about this but in the past you listen to a podcast and you're like I don't agree with you on any of that but it's also so good to hear people's like I genuinely

[01:55:28] Jessica: If I like disagree with you I'm gonna be like okay wait explain to me how this works for you yeah because there must be a reason why were disagreeing let's figure out why we're disagreeing why tell me about your brain because I'm so intrigued like how'd you learn it that way because I think of it this way so in the thing is you're not doing that to find an answer like an answer as in this is truth or not true because truth is the most subjective thing that ever exists like everything that we know of truth is based off of somebody if you just keep following the stream like who says what truth is like we don't even agree on a god so what is really true like but we the parts of what we do we think make us who we are like everything that we do we're like no that's us yeah but if you take an engine it's by

[01:56:18] Jacob: Itself it doesn't have any car eNOS there's no car to it and then you add a muffler to it and there's no cárdenas to the muffler and the uniting together and then finally at some point we don't know we haven't determined you get the wheels on in the body and then you're like this is a car yeah in but when you take those things apart and you have the fender in your hand you're like where's the car eNOS where's the car yeah yeah we think that we are absolutely just one thing but we are every single day you can wake up and you can literally just choose to be a different like something like in your like know who I am is this because I have these things and I've experienced these things and here's my story and this is why you know like regardless like you could this is the worst analogy but this is just the extent of it you can murder someone

[01:57:03] Jessica: Yesterday and save a life today I'm just saying like I'm just saying okay but that is that not black and white like don't print that on these shirts but I'm just saying like if you're like I'm not a good person or I'm a good man or like whatever like yeah like every single day when you wake up you can you're you can create you're not a car you're pieces of a car and that car is built over time

[01:57:30] Jacob: Because yesterday I was this person who went to work from you know 6:00 a. m. until 6 p. m. and then I came home and then I did the dishes and I ate dinner and I said I don't watch the evening news and then I went to bed I'm that person so that's what I'm going to continue doing because why would I do anything else like I Know Who I am but also as you know what you like of course I like this TV dinner like this TV channel like that's the thing do you like it or do your the combination of

[01:57:57] Jessica: Your dopamine and here like tell me

[01:57:59] Jacob: About you like but that was a that really brought me back to like my second year in my bachelor's degree we there

[01:58:09] Jessica: Was a class that I had to take and we had to watch this video and do it with him and it was a mindfulness video but it was literally like eating a Hershey's kiss and you know honestly those aren't my favorite candies but it's chocolate and if it was sitting in from me I'll eat it yeah so we have to go through the process with them and it actually tastes

[01:58:27] Jacob: Like butter because chocolate is I must be or something derived of something like you know something to stick it or want to stick it well like

[01:58:38] Jessica: It's milk chocolate so I guess I should say that cuz dark chocolate is dark chocolate milk chocolate obviously has like cream Basin and our butter and our salt or sugar I don't even know what the hell's in it I don't know I'm not a great Baker clearly I just follow the directions mm-hmm anyhow and then you were able to taste like the grittiness of it and I was like well that's weird I've never thought of a Hershey's kiss so they like point out these things like think about the greediness your eyes right okay well

[01:59:03] Jacob: It then here the wrapper I mean it's very much so you know you know it's a Hershey kiss but you're they're kind of making you point out what are the things about it that you like the things you think you love about it so I love the parts of the car yes but in it this like a taking yeah I know taking apart so this is for maybe a belief that's how I would probably put this is you have a belief system and this is exactly what you believe and like the Hershey's kiss you end up thinking actually doesn't smell as good as it I thought it did and then eventually you like honey you know it actually kind of was buttery and gritty and it didn't I wasn't as sweet as I remember it to be you start taking these preconceived ideas from what everyone else has told you and you slowed down and he's not what do I think

[01:59:53] Jessica: About this item

[01:59:55] Jacob: Yeah I think about this outside of what the commercial tells you that's rich and creamy right and it has this cute little jingle and it's like in the you know it's wearing Christmas trousers one like you equate it with Christmas which is also time when you're happy like whatever and you everybody loves chocolate it's a slogan that we say in society like it but it's I think we can equate that to the parts of the car like

[02:00:22] Jessica: You were saying like some of your parts of your car don't actually work anymore and they're a little outdated

[02:00:29] Jacob: Yeah so you bought it you know you bought an 87 fastback yeah well holy **** some of the stuff that was cool then not actually is cool to you right now yeah and the only way that you're going to get the updated car is if you are willing to let go of you okay but also I think you don't buy a

[02:00:46] Jessica: Car I think that we forget that we create our own car right like we think that we bought a car we think that we're like well my **** parents gave me this 86 highboy ton Honda I just made up a tonda hi boy I just made up an up my own car cuz you can make it but that's the thing I made up my own car you can **** make up your own car no that's the thing is like we think that we're handed into this hand-me-down car like who we are and what we need to be and the truth is you can just like wake up even though you murder someone in your car yesterday wake up I'm keeping that bring it round you can you can you can drive you can wake up me like I'm gonna steal the ambulance today I'm gonna drive that to work I mean really they're like you like you could choose me you want to be every day you could just choose your Karnas one day but you could

[02:01:30] Jacob: Save a life I think you should maybe don't take Jake's advice literally okay well if you watch Grey's Anatomy you know save lives have your doctor hmm but every doc today's a great day to save a life yeah okay wait I have one more thing so

[02:01:45] Jessica: Getting back to like let's say advice for younger generation like what kid like cuz there's a lot say there's a young kid listening to this who's like is on their social media like they're not even on a point where they're like they don't they have Valiant excuses of why they're on their social media or they're like they're just or even they're just like dude like I do kinda wanna get rid of it like I noticed taking my time I want to work on my dreams but like I can't like I think so I taught like a small like for lack of a better term meditation yoga class but

[02:02:17] Jacob: Last week when you guys came over like so for me can you see can you see how

[02:02:26] Jessica: That helps me pull myself out and like find my real self and that helps me get

[02:02:32] Jacob: Out of the walking around thinking about what other people are thinking of me it gets me out of my self-conscious way of being that the internet culture has now

[02:02:45] Jessica: It's now our normal self-conscious way of being let's just call that like you're thinking about what other people think of you and this meditation yoga thing that I interest you guys to like do you do you see the connections like I

[02:02:57] Jacob: Was trying to like point out like this is what it means to find yourself your intuition like you listen to the real you yeah and if we can suggest some sort

[02:03:09] Jessica: Of like meditation yoga sort of like what can we have kids like in their basement alone or in their room alone you have to appeal to what they

[02:03:20] Jacob: Like first game there yeah don't go

[02:03:24] Jessica: Somewhere you like yeah so you that I think is important and I think I'm sorry like obviously studying a lot of business and consulting and stuff lately I've been noticing people say like appeal to what they don't know they want and that's so true but you have to have something that wraps them in that has even a little bit of their you have to enter their world a little bit to get them to like are you open gate let me gain your trust right you wouldn't have this podcast with some girl you just met walking through downtown cast rocky probably would have invited her yet but maybe you never know yeah I'm

[02:04:05] Jacob: Saying well chances are good that your you invited me because we're comfortable we're good friends and you trust me you have some sort of which opens me up to be able to listen to your opinion right so same for these kids probably even more so because you know if I if I were an outfit that looks kind of like the girls are wearing right now right you know and I kind of have some conversations about things that they might want to talk about or like even just like oh yeah I'm listening give them that attention that's okay you're speaking to what I like yeah then I can say my piece and they're there in I've caught you then not right you know it's it's got to be outfit that's the thing is in the thing is we also forget in that same sense people find that and figure it out like oh I figured out the trick I can't these **** like the thing is humans know truth like we know we can sense it like we the same way that when you're on the freeway and you look over the **** looks

[02:05:02] Jacob: Right back at you yes because we can sense these things right so if you're not being truthful in like being like hey like I'm not gonna pretend to be this person just cuz it's gonna get to you guys but like here is a thing that is a real part of me that I'm going to word it in form it and paint it in this way to where you guys understand so for example my value right exactly so

[02:05:26] Jessica: I'm not gonna push it in the face of people who are not interested yeah that's a huge thing with me it's like with this podcast I don't like I don't talk about social media like I eventually may start doing like a once a week poster like I don't know something but like I don't want it to be forcing people who don't care about this stuff to listen to it like it yeah if you want to if you find it if you need it like okay yeah getting them interested okay so what I've done so like as a DJ what I do I what they want is they come up to me so like I do a DJ

[02:05:57] Jessica: A lot of ctsos and so that's like student conferences like it'll be like thousands of kids in like a conference hall in there and shirt and ties but like they're also high school kids so yeah you want to party so they come up in their brat and play Gucci gang like you know like that could play that new 2 Chainz song like they're just saying absurd things to me that of course I'm never going to in my professional life play **** Gucci King over the intercom at a high school organization place like so they think they know what they want right they absolutely think they know what they want because if I play Gucci gang Chad who reaffirms himself as Chad

[02:06:31] Jacob: Master General yeah isn't it when I play it he can now do this dance yeah like in like now Jennifer knows the best job so like but so you will accidentally reaffirm who you think you are if you keep following all the things so you need to stop in your tracks and so with the meditation course the yoga thing that I taught you guys I mean I don't want to take the spark out of it for the more that I'll do in the future but I'll get better at it as I go but I essentially have them like turn off

[02:07:02] Jessica: Themselves in a sentence like it's not it's not a trick it's not it's me being my genuine self they all know me they trust me and I haven't kind of my house and I have them kind of just shut up and listen to me for a bit yeah III yeah I

[02:07:15] Jacob: Turn I don't I don't allow the audience to have a say but it's not like you guys this is what you do you need to follow the rules I have something to say like it's I create trust they come here and they trust me enough to even come here so that's something that I'm doing right in life right like a you know I've been a good friend enough yeah like my you know like I invite them and I and I try to I tried intentionally when you guys got here I try to break down who you think you are like make you think of things that you wouldn't think of so you got here and typically you're probably thinking I'm gonna walk in we're gonna do this and you have expectations of like don't need to bring yoga mat whatever like one of them one of our friends brought yoga mat like you got here and I had a view a basketball and we started playing pig and I said the first thing that everybody got here I said some form of like hey just be mindful of what you're thinking of today yeah and I said some form of that to everybody and like so I didn't take away

[02:08:06] Jacob: These people's time I didn't go to their house and rip them out and say hey you be mindful right now I offered based off of my information based off of my like trust like I said hey here's something I really think you guys will enjoy and like they can see the progress in me like they know that it's true then I'm being truthful yeah like so I think that the essence of all these things really has to be something that you have spent your **** time in like who are you to interrupt anybody's life to tell them to turn off who they

[02:08:33] Jessica: Are just because you're like try what I think yeah and so we're trying to like shut each other up and like know what I think is good but like if we can find ways just of honestly not only trusting each other but also finding ways to

[02:08:46] Jacob: Follow like and stack all of this knowledge and be like okay how is this work for other people like so you guys got here and we got active when we

[02:08:53] Jessica: Got moving we like I would actively try to engage in this style of conversation yeah like you'll probably know you probably would notice cuz it's supernatural but like we didn't really talk about other people most of time like it's we talked about started hinting at meditation yeah sure calm anyone if there's an emergency let's talk about somebody right exactly your life has a lot more to it and your brain does a lot more than just gossip

[02:09:20] Jacob: Yeah it's funny so the people who are gossiping there I'm not really gonna think of they're gossiping like they're not going to admit like oh my god I'm just saying it everybody thinks that a man is a **** like I'm not I'm not gossiping like I mean I'm definitely I mean so here's the thing as well like I just did throw up my hands become not gossiping like we all do that anything is it's like we're Cosby's **** man were gossipy creatures like we want to know what's going on right okay so what's

[02:09:46] Jessica: Gossip so for me I feel like this podcast we're gonna define a lot of things gossip is for I guess for me is like I was talking negatively about a situation to somebody else who really didn't need to be in the know sometimes mm-hmm sometimes it's negative and

[02:10:03] Jacob: Sometimes it's like an exciting gossip like oh my god someone suppose pregnant they're not gonna tell you how exciting I'm so glad I know however how did I find out okay I probably found out from somebody who said right does that make

[02:10:16] Jessica: It about that's I'm saying so there is a negative connotation with it does happen to be negative though because but just saying like hey did you here that this person is pregnant like that's not that's talking about someone else certainly and it makes it makes us feel weird right well how are you talking about I can actually can hear you yeah where are all these names I have a lot of names today I don't know any of these people my sister's name is Ashley she's super friendly but she's pretty cool yeah we Have we have these like negative I gave up on that one connotation of gossip yeah negative connotation of gossip so that doesn't mean that like just cuz you're saying someone's pregnant just cuz you're talking about other people but I think that talking about other

[02:11:00] Jacob: People as in whatwhat's the newest news

[02:11:04] Jessica: On someone else is gossip doesn't have to be negative you have to be like did you hear that Cynthia's dad like hooked

[02:11:12] Jacob: Up with Amanda's mom like what like it doesn't have to be negative it was elaborate - it doesn't have to be negative but it's like wasting your valuable 100 slots a day in the 24 hours

[02:11:24] Jessica: But so you don't get to form new neurological pathways when **** Jennifer's moms gossip is in your brain so what do you do every day to get away

[02:11:38] Jacob: From that stuff so because the bottom line is these are things you may not know that you're doing or are taking up your time until you're able to step back so you know we talked about information overload right such a common thing so what if we learn all this stuff typically like I don't learn my gossip from social media I learned my gossip by like seeing it on social media and asking a friend who might know right so I don't think that's

[02:12:01] Jessica: Absolutely right so if I see it on social media I'm like I don't know if I can believe that or whatever I don't know but I'm gonna go to my second source here and I'm gonna find out and then what they told me is like oh I found that out but it doesn't actually affect me so I'm just gonna I'm here came in and a little bit but like it doesn't actually I don't need it but I'm gonna I'm gonna just let it out later yeah we feel like we need to do something with it yeah we recognize that it's not **** ours and we need to put it somewhere yeah where we need to put it is just let it go or say it like I don't know why you're taking a poop and nobody's listening to your see yeah see my **** dogs you yeah as you're taking a poop just like

[02:12:40] Jacob: Damn y'all here Jennifer's pregnant yeah and then you stop when you listen that you're like damn what a waste of like why don't anybody like we don't even know that we're gonna know when she has a baby when we see her next that'll be fine we'll see the baby in a year we don't have to think about her ever again until a year was here bashing your name do you think that do you think the information has been held up so highly valuable to us that we think all information is important yeah everything we learn is accidentally important though yeah which it is it is sure whatever but if it's what you but does it to be the most important yeah what does it do for your life yeah what is it so if these kids are out gossiping like what so what can they do better in their life so like next time maybe just hearing this conversation maybe they can stop and be like oh **** I am talking about Cynthia again yeah like or Oh Joey just walked up to me I'm gonna tell him all about Stephanie's mom like maybe you're gonna

[02:13:42] Jacob: Have this little inch this little let's call it intuition as a spark of joy little seed that'll say like Jennifer's whoever I said like but so the thing is I'm not kidding if you start listening to the little voice and you just don't say it like it's okay to be in silence where you can wait for them to talk or if they talk and they're like hey did you hear about Jennifer you could be like oh cool and you could change the subject like you can really yeah so it's so interject there's like a little voice before your thoughts of just saying **** out loud and you could interject and the

[02:14:20] Jessica: Way so that voice is very weak in people who are never alone if you are never ever alone if you even if you're codependent like even if you had a terrible I think that I think of that by human nature so I've actually thought about this very intricately so are you saying intuition is intuition exists with the network I would say yeah that little boy I sorry I'm gonna say are you saying intuition yeah people say like so you're saying

[02:14:50] Jacob: I've had I've had this I think very

[02:14:54] Jessica: Indefinitely like through intuition so if we're all of the earth like we're not like we didn't come from like we weren't born on Mars and we took some spaceship somebody got on earth really all right how do we feel like we're literally like as far as we know our best our best bet is that we crew I mean this is like our truth this is what we know evolution we grew those years like evolution created

[02:15:15] Jacob: Humans like after turn we are of the earth so if you took away time we are equally the same **** thing that Iraq is like from this thing that's the earth forever yeah and the so an intuition what an intuition means to me is all these things have their job so like my

[02:15:37] Jessica: Liver knows how to be livery like it does delivery things like I'm not consciously processing this beer I'm not consciously processing this like I'm not saying this is bad let's put it here like mrs. P this is poop like nothing that poop goes through everybody yeah no

[02:15:56] Jacob: But like so the things the process of our body of a human's body and of the world knows what to do without it's an intuition yeah so society and what happens from society so from society we've now created these this terrible thing of like kids stuck and set the second stage of what we went through like which was amazing but it also has terrible imitations like they don't know that before yeah yes so they

[02:16:21] Jessica: May not know their intuition so I think

[02:16:24] Jacob: Yeah so I think that it may be our duty and I'm not even just saying this podcast like I literally I think this may be it may be a poopy to really like say like holy **** like we accidentally robbed these kids of feeling the feeling of a gut the kid

[02:16:44] Jessica: Ourselves - yeah and I've had a break because we don't want to feel **** well no we just have never when you have when you have social media or you have technology or you have whatever it like we were saying when you go on a trip and I go to vacation if I'm like okay I've looked at this thing on Pinterest a million times we've got to be beautiful and you get there and you're in your

[02:17:05] Jacob: It's game effects aren't applied to it yeah and it's too real I feel that's pretty and that's all you got because you don't get this aw moment and

[02:17:15] Jessica: It's the same with life in

[02:17:18] Jacob: General like this is the what if I would leave you know the world ever given advice to it 11 12 year old kid it's take some time to walk outside and breathe in the fresh air see the grass you know hear it feel the wind like literally use all of your senses maybe even not maybe even take your sight away for a while you know I mean give yourself the idea of like functioning mm-hmm yeah like

[02:17:42] Jessica: Meditative sorts and so yeah well I mean I mean see what feels right to you there's not really like it's not like you go outside and you're like looking at this list that you just wrote down right like you're like okay they said go sign okay fill your senses okay

[02:17:58] Jacob: Like so what this means what this

[02:18:03] Jessica: Means to mean like this is leading back to what I was talking about that little meditation yoga class I taught is I really was just trying to shut who you

[02:18:13] Jacob: Who you need to do you think you need to be or who you think others think you are off and in really like for lack of a better word forced presence on you like or actually no awakened the presence that's already in you like and so I sat there and we went through some meditations but essentially all you need to do to do this yourself let's say is just sit down and commit to

[02:18:38] Jessica: Whatever you gonna do like whether that's I'm gonna listen to this person or I'm gonna try this two-minute meditation or whatever and you turn your phone in airplane mode you turn it off or you leave it inside you put music on whenever you got to do go outside and just be with whatever you're thinking about right like just get outside

[02:18:54] Jacob: Yeah like and so here's the thing is if

[02:18:57] Jessica: You've never been taught this before so Jessica I'm afraid that when you say go outside in pee with the grass and smell the air like I don't think I don't think that these kids know how to do what that mean so what I mean by that there is as is a human nature and I'm not even trying to be whoohoo about this is there's an incredible you can feel right yeah it is though just because I mean I'm saying these things based off of who I used to be who vs.

[02:19:25] Jacob: Who I am now like there is I

[02:19:28] Jessica: Promise you just completely sober you

[02:19:30] Jacob: Can go outside and just really after some experience smell the air and look at the beautiful trees and feel like you're actually a part of something like you don't feel like you know you see you're talking like a homeless person who feels like they don't have that underlying layer like you can feel that thing just a part of being alive like being a part of the earth is that your welcoming yeah you can and so go outside and so this is something that like you can't do this wrong you can't do this there's not really been doing right like this is just being who you are without any input so don't try to like what would I do or like oh how would I say or how do what does it mean to smell like just go inside just start smelling and then there shouldn't be any confinement yeah

[02:20:16] Jessica: Because I think we that's the thing a lot of rules a little yeah I mean that's really look at what religious did we literally read the **** we think that it's a metaphysical book and we're like well you should drink the body of Christ so we'd make wine like dude it's weird like yeah these are all we don't need anything right but no don't things these aren't literal things these are there's something that you have potential of feeling like if these things seem like they're you have something real like I had like my life could maybe be better like maybe it's not something maybe I should go walk outside for comment yeah there's something that for me personally I felt as a 27 year old man that I had I don't think or maybe I had forgot about it that I hadn't felt as a kid that I had ever felt before like this is a profound like a presence true presence had been taken from me I'm not here to blame the internet right I understand it now yeah but I mean I'm saying like I was in a let's say a blind like I was very depressed for five years let's say yeah like I was in a blindness of

[02:21:23] Jessica: Course I knew I was depressed and I was a sad **** but like this sentence

[02:21:27] Jacob: Wouldn't make sense someone's a go outside just breathe air it'll make you feel better I'm like you are stupid that's not how things work you don't understand my blah yeah I'm and I'm this and you don't know what the pressure is like I'm telling you don't need to know the answer to this and you're not looking for an answer here's the thing you're not looking for an answer go outside and breathe the air pressure breathe you breathe the fresh air look around the trees and don't have

[02:21:49] Jessica: Your phone out don't have if you're gonna have music in your phone like go to Spotify shuffle meditation yoga or whatever no please no words and this something from a DJ in a music person

[02:21:58] Jacob: Like I love music and I'm always shoving

[02:22:01] Jessica: Music John my ears and podcasters go out and be with only or thoughts I would say I need a little bit of background music if I can help and I enjoy background music but just like peaceful piano or meditation yoga and just walk around

[02:22:13] Jacob: Yeah in and watch what you think about don't watch what you think about as an observer try not to do anything but just don't change don't change where you're at or what you're doing yeah just follow away like this is something that I had a really hard time with but then it took I guess a good yoga teacher and then also like Adrian yoga with Adriene oh yeah

[02:22:35] Jessica: She's grateful I really love when someone who's teaching you because usually if you're teaching the goal is get this right do this right

[02:22:45] Jacob: That's what we've learnt I loved I don't remember where I want to say like hellos maybe on Commerce in Longview I think that's where I really the first so that's a you that yoga studio yoga studio yeah what's it called oh no solos hol OS I'll check it out and we I did hot yoga with one of my girlfriends who's also super like encouraging and understanding not judgmental and really not I mean she's really a huge person that I needed at the time and we went to yoga together and I was like I'm doing this wrong whoever and the lady said like not even maybe like 40 seconds after I had thought had that thought and was like about to like quit the move we were doing she was like you cannot do this wrong and I was just like thank God dude it feel like I don't like it's so funny I feel like they could say that multiple times in like suddenly it clicked with Adriene like it was something and I kept repeating with you guys too in the little thing I did like it's something that we literally think we're so social

[02:23:46] Jacob: Media trains you and like even our political system like our whole society like it's terrible to use we're cited so

[02:23:51] Jessica: Often but we've kind of actually been trained that everything needs an end like everything like you're doing this you can get to this you yes thank you like here yeah here's the thing is like dude you're not wrong like these things you have like everything's that I'm crazy but like I think that this is

[02:24:08] Jacob: Right you're not wrong at all what you think is right as maybe is right that's okay like you can feel that way you've got a coincide fighting what you think is right outwardly it's not how you do it you got to come sort of what's right inside and then you live your life according to how does this what I think work out of here one and what is so III keep poking up like I really want to get it through to anybody listening young kids especially of like they're not going to see like what is the point of going outside and just walking in 20 minutes okay so you think it's something that like okay so there's something that we commonly say like if you coincide and you just please don't talk to any like don't walk with a friend don't bring music just go outside and just listen and walk or sit or something for iam and it's like you think like that's enough to make them experience like that's what they're talking about or do you think we need to like do they need to be thinking about certain things or going to just watch what they're thinking about like for the youth I

[02:25:08] Jessica: Would say just getting them to make the

[02:25:12] Jacob: Decision themselves to go outside right

[02:25:14] Jessica: Because they are very much in the like I'm not gonna do that if I don't have to mm-hmm nobody wants to be the first person on the dance floor they've always got to wait for one person to go out there first I wouldn't I think I think it would come with like the that mindset of like how is this gonna immediately make me feel better and if you can't give me a legitimate reason right you can't make me like understand the feeling

[02:25:38] Jacob: Right here right now I'm not going dude I don't want to go to work to make money I don't work overtime if I don't have to are really not gonna directly benefit me yeah so I think it has to be something cuz to be really fair I'm that way I'm very much like I don't

[02:25:55] Jessica: Want to make a cheese quesadilla on the

[02:25:59] Jacob: Stove oh yeah I don't want to make a cheese quesadilla on the stove and I don't want to add any meat and make it like so good that I could make it home

[02:26:10] Jessica: Because I want it right now I'm hungry and I don't care if it tastes that great I want it yeah so if it doesn't directly benefit me and it takes me 15 minutes that's why cooking is so hard because I was like holy **** it's gonna take me 45 minutes to make this meal

[02:26:24] Jacob: Right and I'm in it and I'm gonna eat it in one minute I don't mindfully eat it at that point that point I'm just done with it and do you think the instant gratification robbed you of the I mean the essence of having a grilled cheese is kind of the fact that you have enough free time that you chose your job well enough - we have enough free time in your nice apartment with your husband with you or whatever like to enjoy a grilled cheese sandwich you're gonna put some peppers on it you're gonna do like it's the essence of the because because time is not who can have the most time ever and you win there's no winning in life you thought we all die this is all taken from a student like yeah so time is it so if you can get to a point where you can enjoy from point A to point Z not just a - like

[02:27:12] Jacob: I'm a and then I need to get to Z right **** now if you enjoyed the letters in between by like I like cooking this and enjoy my house is nice so if you can go outside and be like oh I'm able to like walk around on sound like that's pretty cool like oh this is nice you start to notice things you appreciate and then it replaces all these thoughts that you have every day of like Jesse's **** mom and Jesse's

[02:27:34] Jessica: Mom exactly like just all these thoughts that you've been filled with by your phone by school by all these just life just like just yeah and yeah it started

[02:27:44] Jacob: Yeah I mean I do have you know that's not with the exception of snapchat and then I have a Facebook that's just for my work I have to keep up on it but I don't actually have like but anyway I feel like without social media I have

[02:27:59] Jessica: Enough I have information overload right so it's bizarre to me that at my time with that other people's information it's crazy because now that I'm done with school and it's been a long time since I've been like done with school not worked a job that stresses me out or makes me feel like I have to devote my entire brain to it I'm having time again to go and do the things that I want to do and make myself and I'm finally in this place where I'm like I feel like I have free time yeah it has

[02:28:30] Jacob: Been so you know he's doing right and even on you know even on my days off from work I'm going I'm doing this I'm making sure this is done having this done this is done this is here making sure I see this 14 people in 24 hours because I have to because I haven't seen them in a company obligations almost yeah I peel that away dude and I was thinking you know I think like tomorrow oh I don't work till 3:00 and you know Tyler's not going home until 11:00 or 12:00 so I have just like all right so so what do you like what's your like so you're going to use just because I'm in you are you're gonna use that like that's you time like it's Jessica time just like what are your plans and like just in terms of like how could other people create their own instead of watching Netflix when you get a couple minutes instead of going on social media instead of smoking cigarette instead of like whatever these things that don't really seem to be doing anything but killing time yeah like or really if

[02:29:30] Jacob: It's on your phone let's just eliminate that it's like how do you like are you just like what are you what's your day look like tomorrow well your free time I mean in general yeah so I like to start my morning with like making my coffee I've been making cappuccinos for myself isn't something and it's like a just one of my favorite things and I finally started making them for myself in the morning at my house and then I'm sitting down on the couch typically with the dogs because I you know yes they slept in our bedroom or in our bed but I didn't like pay attention to them all night so I wake up and we are just going

[02:30:03] Jessica: Yeah we have like time where I get to like hang out with my dogs and drink my coffee on the occasion I read a book on my phone or whatever but I also like I know I want to learn to play the guitar the other thing is I'm not putting pressure on learning guitar yeah what's the point in learning if you're drilling it like it's not about being able to play guitar it's like learning to play guitar the word learning it's like the coolest part because you like can't pattern over time up the guitar right now sitting with the guitar for 10 minutes prick plucking at the strings and pretending and hearing the sounds mm-hmm six months yeah I am

[02:30:40] Jacob: Still getting myself like it's a slow process but it's going it's killing that instant gratification bug to like the Instagram efficacious were like I wanted to and my perfectionism yeah because you there's no right and wrong with what you're doing you're just experiencing life like your III don't I know I'm not I'm gonna pick up his car and I'm not good at it dang that sucks you just put it down you never try it again no you crunch I say this like half heartedly half joking earlier when we were talking about me having 27 jobs hmm I quit things when I'm when I'm done with them and I do it you know I react on emotions a lot of the time I would say in my past the other thing is I act based on like I am NOT happy doing this job I refuse to continue doing it and usually by the point that I've quit I've tried multiple ways or I've like went to

[02:31:34] Jacob: Work and been like okay I'm gonna enjoy this today how can I make this better so I went through the motions of like making things better yeah talk to yourself about it right knows you don't know what you think until you talk to yourself right but I'm a badly working to be better about not quitting things immediately because they're hard soccer is a great example I am a phenomenal coach I would be a phenomenal coach I

[02:31:57] Jessica: Know the field I know the plays I know the dynamics I know the logistics I could tell you when there's a great player I can tell you what positions you should be in when I'm on the field myself I am only good to be the bully

[02:32:08] Jacob: And I say that because I chose to

[02:32:11] Jessica: Disregard the hard parts of my summer of

[02:32:14] Jacob: Getting in shape and actually like

[02:32:17] Jessica: Working on snow moment I know I'm a

[02:32:19] Jacob: Great shooter and I don't have strong legs and I'm a you know I can run the whole game right I never never would go home and work on footwork by myself because was afraid I was gonna break my ankle yeah I knew I wasn't good at it and it was hard and I didn't even know where to start and I never looked on YouTube when I was 16 I didn't think about it that wasn't thing well that's why I'm saying I didn't look for skills I didn't try to like learn how to make myself better so I learned unexpected team better right you know by being this I was good the funny one or the inspirational Werner whatever and that's totally cool I'm glad with that but over this last I want

[02:32:59] Jessica: To say year has probably been a pretty good learning curve for me because I was able to quit a job that I absolutely was just like stuck in I was able to do a lot of things well that's here for a whole finger biz like yeah it has been pretty like wow life-changing and I

[02:33:13] Jacob: Think now I'm kind of getting to the point where I'm mentally fighting that fight and a lot of it you know not a lot of it I can't I can't credit all that Tyler does a really good job of being like that's your mentality saying that is not you are not incapable like the Tyler is saying you're so capable you're saying it as an absolute it's not yeah and he's saying break down that wall like I can't run three miles but are you kidding me okay what he is built to run okay but so I think I think is that's obviously that's very important I totally agree but I think that what does take what is being taken away is like what like someone is really gonna say even as a joke like even if like this gives to be on someone's **** joking Instagram mean page of like recording this and being like me after I hear that like go out **** I

[02:34:01] Jessica: Wanna do that when I eat chips and I don't like so like I'm inserting like comedy is a good way to like read it on that boat of like self shame and let that happen but like how do we I'm

[02:34:11] Jacob: Afraid that people are going to stop with why would I do that when I could

[02:34:17] Jessica: Just eat chips like why would I push myself what is the volume there's genuine genuinely I think that people have never ever experienced like their inner selves like triumphantly winning something or like and I'm talking more like a trophy or whatever like I'm talking about like oh **** this is something that I single-handedly worked very hard on and I feel the like this may be a better man like there's evil how do people and I think a lot of people because of the Internet who have never felt this before there's 30 years older 40 years old there's 13 year olds who have never felt this like this is an experience of

[02:34:51] Jacob: Like wonder of like yeah of I don't

[02:34:55] Jessica: Think I could run four miles and then you run four miles and you're like oh **** and then other people around you are like to him he ran four miles I'm the same age as him he's like only install I don't have a groom for miles I'm like what I'm saying like no these people like I think yeah it's so

[02:35:12] Jacob: They've never felt yeah so they only see the obstacles like why would I do that because I'm saying the why of why we do

[02:35:21] Jessica: Anything is it there isn't an answer to that yeah I don't think I think that why we do everything is the essence of doing

[02:35:31] Jacob: Everything the journey of life is

[02:35:34] Jessica: Really just a journey I don't even think I don't even know like what's going on at the end of life or like I think it's just a journey like the essence of why do you do anything is to get better yeah

[02:35:54] Jacob: Right yeah how can you eat in the tunnel

[02:35:58] Jessica: How can you floss on the tunnel yeah they said they or like or even outside of that like just to tend on a mystical being part like what is the tunnel no

[02:36:10] Jacob: Not what is in the tunnel not how about what is it tunnel why are we talking about who put the tunnel there come back next week Junkyard Love Podcast no let's

[02:36:25] Jessica: Let's wrap it up the Jessica Faul what

[02:36:28] Jacob: Is a fowler fall let's settle that

[02:36:30] Jessica: Anybody on the internet we could do that **** do like the Internet has created these two different last name worlds and first names like your name starts with an N but it ends with like seven GS nobody knows they make up words in their head so is it fall or foul just to fall well okay I'm gonna solve this age-old familial battle okay we say foul because it's German the AU in Germany in German languages ow right so foul may you espouse however I have a as my dad has always explained it rich side of my family who calls themselves the Falls so

[02:37:09] Jacob: Really like separating themselves yeah yes so the fouls were the ones who didn't have money and the Falls were the rich family see I wonder like how much of that like how does that look is that real do they really think that do they think they're any better than you well that's the thing is when people meet me and they know any of the falls they say are you related to so-and-so fall and I'll say yeah because yeah of course yeah they relate to like if you have that last name it's not common it's not a common last name I don't know anybody else in the frickin world of where we live in the environment that I'm not related to that house that name it's not like a Jones or you know it's nothing like that it's not just its common last name so I'm always like yes and I never correct people because personally I don't give a **** dude yeah why like people like it's Rihanna it's like it doesn't matter at

[02:38:02] Jessica: All like those are things we just took our 100 memory slots and we filled **** one of them with you correcting me on Rihanna like but I used to do the same thing so I know I literally used to go on my way to correct people and they said the wrong form of your or you are which granted language is important and we shouldn't really just throw it around like get it together but I used to correct it so Jessica Faul or

[02:38:26] Jacob: Fall whichever you'd like we're fufu but

[02:38:30] Jessica: What is searching your junk yard if you're 27 years of life like not just what you've learned recently like what you've learned in life like what is something like if you if you had to leave behind like when you leave this world like what's uh what's something that you want that's where you can leave it alright thank you ladies and gentlemen we'll just loop that for four hours and that will be the outro of this meditation yeah and your meditate that's your that's your chance that's your channel yeah your mantra is just what would you like to leave behind like what's something you were gosh I don't know I what's important for other people

[02:39:13] Jacob: To know from you that you've learned get to know people yeah get to and do it in their in their way on the way that you know the way that they like do it how live in their world yeah really like listen I guess is the thing because you if you get to know someone you're not doing the talking you're hearing them if I ever leave this world

[02:39:34] Jessica: Behind if I ever leave this world behind

[02:39:37] Jacob: If I ever leave this world behind

[02:39:42] Jessica: [Laughter]