Episode 013 with Nona Southard

[00:00:00] Nona: Check okay I think Kokanee is actually

[00:00:03] Jacob: Like a Canadian beer coke music Amy I

[00:00:05] Nona: Think so like I remember something my cousin was talking about where he thought you have to find Sasquatch on the container like on the book on the bottles yeah like you search for it that is the coolest business model to have we just thank you got a secret Yeti just hiding out and your do you believe in

[00:00:27] Jacob: Sasquatch I believe there could be

[00:00:31] Nona: Something out there but it's also I

[00:00:34] Jacob: Don't really swim it's a slim chance it's a slim chance what is the story of Sasquatch even is it like is it just there's some evolutionary it's not an ape it's not a human but it's a thing and he has survived but he's just elusive I feel like someone got really bored in high school and they just dressed up and some fur cost you maybe he'll read video and someone saw everyone's gonna believe it I mean we kind of see it a lot so the weed store here for example right next door is the weed story Council Ron no there is yeah marijuana store yeah you can buy marijuana in Castle Rock Washington yeah it's next to make the mountain yeah the mountains gifts I think it's okay yeah oh I know the one I used to go there all the time as a young woman you used to every Sunday mom took me to the Mount St. Helens gift see what they got in all right well we are in my friend

[00:01:46] Nona: Nona

[00:01:48] Jacob: Wynonna Southard what do you typically like to go by now that you're older I just go by Nona oh is it just me that

[00:01:55] Nona: Just puts Wynonna in front of it just I think everybody just assumes that it's Wynonna because that's my technical name a technical name did you have anything against it when you were younger like do not come today do you don't put that Y in there I hated it because everyone would just automatically assume that I was Wynonna Judd or a writer that's not what I'm named after this is like a super intelligent unintelligent way to take any conversation like your name is like this name okay what do you want to say about that well I'm named after the Mötley Crüe song Nona there's an actual song named Nona and I'm named after a Mötley Crüe song that's epic is it like a dirty song or is it no it's actually like a super slow boring song but it's like we have to pick we have to pick one song yes that was it oh we're just gonna take the greatest albums and just stack them together pick a name that's how my parents came home with it I think there's know a lot of parents came up with a lot of names but I mean

[00:02:54] Jacob: Nowadays we go up pop culture like I you know say Jackson for example you know that's probably a lot from Jackson Teller from Sons of Anarchy like that's gonna say Jemma right I mean that's it when I'm watching TV when I'm watching a lot of movies and stuff I've I'm not shape to be like that is the coolest name ever I'm gonna lock that in my memory bank for later baby yeah okay cool so Nona Southard welcome to the Junkyard Love Podcast yeah I'm happy to have you it's funny that I

[00:03:23] Nona: So I originally when we were first talking obviously I was originally like oh man you know a lot about guns carpentry woodworking you're recently a mom you're with Brandon Bartlett it was just like one most amazing cool awesome people and so I just wanted to hear stories about Brandon mostly but as we just went and we had a quick drink in just a conversation and caught up just as friends - I feel like there was a few more things that bubbled up to the surface that were a bit more important to talk about so I would love to dip into guns and carpentry and the things that you are amazing at but let's start with motherhood you recently you recently a mother you want to talk about that yeah so I just had my child

[00:04:06] Jacob: First one bricks Lee is six months old

[00:04:10] Nona: She's right about six months um

[00:04:13] Jacob: And that was a huge life changer like you think you're a very stable and life is just going well and then all of a sudden like oh you're gonna be a mother it's gonna be so amazing and then life

[00:04:29] Nona: Just will take a huge **** sometime yeah and just hit you with like all of this knowledge that you never knew that you

[00:04:36] Jacob: Could even grasp because you're just having to take care of somebody that's not yourself you have to be the most selfless person you can which is definitely hard after being single for so long and just doing my own thing and always being a very independent person mm-hmm it's crazy and then just along

[00:04:56] Nona: With that too like you never know how much you can take as a person until you

[00:05:02] Jacob: Are just pushed to your limits right and

[00:05:04] Nona: I feel like being a stay-at-home mom

[00:05:07] Jacob: Which is what I am technically right now

[00:05:11] Nona: There's a huge stigma on stay-at-home

[00:05:14] Jacob: Moms that you feel like everybody just

[00:05:17] Nona: Sees you as somebody that stays home and

[00:05:19] Jacob: Chills on the couch and oh you just catch up on your shows is the case yeah you're just gonna stay home all day and then the husband comes home and he's like oh what did you do all day it's not

[00:05:30] Nona: Typical sitcom pain in their mind and you have to explain everything and it's a lot more than that it's

[00:05:38] Jacob: Definitely in depth of what I don't know I just yeah I thought I was gonna know everything and I was gonna be all set and then it happened and it was a complete 360 of what I thought it would be so when did you start changing like okay so you found out you're having a baby obviously that initial shock is just a huge like well everything's different but then you know you started really changing like your perspective we're talking about earlier perspective hugely shifted was it was it during your pregnancy or after you had fix it uh it

[00:06:11] Nona: Was definitely during because um like we were talking about earlier I was on medication and I had a quick cold turkey what was that medication for listeners uh I was on Adderall okay and I was like

[00:06:24] Jacob: My Adderall for years before that and I

[00:06:28] Nona: Quit cold-turkey so that definitely was a jolt to the system and then also just physically I had never had my body

[00:06:36] Jacob: Changed like that before which was huge it was just very different and I had to accept that this was me and for sure it was it was doing something for somebody other than myself like I was growing a human inside me I was doing something

[00:06:54] Nona: Very selfless and it was amazing it was amazing but there were definitely times where I felt not like myself yeah just like you were like your interests and stuff - did your interest start changing - I mean I love snowboarding I recently got into snowboarding like the year before that and then all of a sudden it was being told no like I can't go snowboarding alright you can't go do all

[00:07:21] Jacob: These things you kind of kind of have that badass attitude - I mean on the outside looking and it seems like you're probably someone who doesn't like to be told now you know yeah you're a huge go-getter of course it's probably been beneficial to your life a lot of the times but yeah I can imagine people who know something know a thing or two about babies and all of a sudden you're pregnant and they're like yeah you can't you can't snowboard right and then when I would ask my doctor and I was like so what is what is the cutoff for snowboarding and she was like staring at me like I was crazy and like no I'm serious but can I still go snowboarding even though I'm pregnant she's like well you could oh my god it's safe for the child but she probably is just like okay slap you right yes well you know I don't think that as it you know of course let's say a general Blanque is named and of course nobody's bad like it's just dangerous of course but there I don't

[00:08:14] Jacob: Know I don't there's a lot of places where me per se I'm like I don't think I should even have an opinion towards that like I think if someone is a professional snow or not professional but like a really good snowboarder and they trust their own ability to not fall I you know I don't know I sometimes I think the mental health is better for the baby than being miserable in the house like what if I don't know I was

[00:08:32] Nona: Definitely not a professional so I knew I was probably gonna go tumble down the hill and yeah so how'd it go since you've been snowboarding this whole time you never stop right um so being a mother

[00:08:50] Jacob: Obviously changed you I don't want to get too hung up on it but we did have a good conversation about the Adderall so stopping that's something that you had been on for a while the ADHD cuz I and so I asked Nona because I the last I don't know over the course of the last four or five years I've been off and on Adderall myself trying to like figure out what works for me and trying different things and also using it as it as an avoidance - in my opinion or in my

[00:09:17] Nona: Case but I'm off of Adderall now and I'm able to manage my attention and I found a lot of other ways to help me and I feel pretty dang sane being off of it and it seems like in here you're not on anymore are you okay and so how you quit and it was it was cold turkey at first it was terrible yeah that's not good

[00:09:39] Jacob: Thing to do Brannon could probably you know relate to this a lot because he

[00:09:45] Nona: Watched me but he definitely the day that I found out I was pregnant snatched

[00:09:51] Jacob: That bottle of Adderall right out of my hand because obviously it could you know change how you're developing a child

[00:09:58] Nona: Inside of you and it was terrible there was like some thoughts inside my mind where it's like oh I could steal that

[00:10:06] Jacob: Back and just like feel better and instead Here I am at night laying in bed just like cold sweats shaking yeah the withdrawals obviously there withdrawal symptoms but just like the zaps of

[00:10:21] Nona: Like okay I have to restructure the way

[00:10:24] Jacob: That I think because this thing this drug this you know it helps you it helps people I don't want to say with ADHD because we you know we have an in-depth combo about that but it's let's just say with ADHD it helps anybody with their focus and it's any drug any Infanta means obviously of course hard to get off and that was rough I mean it seemed like I came off of that drug and

[00:10:50] Nona: It was literally just like months of solid naps because I had no clue how to adjust and when I was still working I mean I worked all the way up until like two weeks before I had her so I was still doing my

[00:11:10] Jacob: Job was that was that nice to you was that a good thing to you do you think yeah of course I just read a lot of different personalities some people prefer to just be solemn but some people are like I would really rather just keep going you know I feel fine or whatever it is for me I knew that if I quit because I am the type of person that has to do something like I can't just sit at home it's making me crazy being stay home mom I knew that if I quit working and if I just stayed home that I would just go insane because I got to keep going yeah but it was rough I mean I quit taking it and it was just like solid naps we had even taken a trip

[00:11:52] Nona: Over to Hawaii and Brandon makes jokes

[00:11:54] Jacob: About it but i napped the whole entire time we were like what are you supposed to do when you're really good naps at least they were good naps you opened up the window you can hear the ocean but it's like what do you do when you're on vacation you're a few months pregnant you can't drink isn't it funny how we have we get to these vacations in so Shane and I went on after a show we both met in Arizona for a few David Caine it was just like a small like oh let's we were celebrating my degree or something else well Becka but we were on hole 30 diet and so we weren't drinking and it was funny realizing how used to drinking we are you know and in we have fun and we ended up having a great time of course but it's funny when you when you go to places when you're not drinking whether it's pregnant or whatever you're following diet or whatever you realize you're like oh yeah like we have to think of things to make our own fun right we can't just get drunk and then everything's fun that's kind of a I mean

[00:12:53] Jacob: That's a real thing that sort of happens as an adult for a lot of people in our ages is learning relearning how to have fun without drinking yeah which is kind of a big one for I mean I am a social drinker so I love to go out and I was

[00:13:08] Nona: Even I was pretty always said I would never be the person that was like pregnant and at the bar mm-hmm I was pregnant at the bar all the time because I still wanted Brandon to go out and have fun and even though I couldn't drink I still wanted to be present and around my friends which most of the time that's at a bar

[00:13:25] Jacob: Right and going out and so I said this is a small town yeah and I don't think that's so wrong what do you think about that now like now that you like you've done it and your mother you've been a mother for a few months like do you think it's a weird stigma I don't think it's that big of a deal I definitely would say don't judge the moms that are out of the bar yeah you have no idea like that mom might have spent her whole entire week in the same pair of sweatpants with no makeup no hair done and like that is her moment to get out yeah let her house just let her have some fun like if she wants to take a shot of water with her friends mr. Pittman yeah I was definitely out like the week before I had her yeah well okay I want to know right perfect I want to make it

[00:14:09] Jacob: A it's just all right we're just gonna set the standard of the junket I love podcasts if you're pregnant you got a baby okay be careful like don't get me don't get next to a guy with you sound a bar fight but come on have fun with your friends yeah be yourself don't be ashamed and also if you see somebody who's pregnant just don't even think about it they're probably trying to enjoy their life just like I am and return to your conversation and so breaking into motherhood obviously like so just switching any prescription that we're on you know there's plenty of people everybody's on different prescription drugs and whatever motherhood that's something that obviously I'm not a mother and I don't plan on being a mother so and something I don't have to think about but you know that's that is that is interesting to think that whatever medication or whatever you're taking you get pregnant and it's like oh shoot like do I want do I want to have this in my system do I want to did you also have to do so like when you guys first got pregnant did you start thinking of like food and stuff too or what yeah I mean

[00:15:09] Nona: I'm pretty I'm pretty more on the healthy side I would say like our household is obviously if anyone knows Brandon Totino's on this half and celery

[00:15:19] Jacob: On the south right we're a little split which bless his heart if he wants to eat a block of cheese for dinner he can eat a block of cheese for dinner block of cheese and it's actually a reality it's a reality where I will eat brussel sprouts and he will eat a block of cheese I mean he's doing kicking he is he's still doing pretty good he's doing very good and he actually will he will eat things that I make he a Brussels sprouts he's eating greens okay so we're doing

[00:15:51] Nona: Very well like Mountain Dew no okay it's

[00:15:57] Jacob: Crazy what's your what's your plan for bricks are you gonna do no are gonna be a no soda mom I was a no soda kid so I think I'm with that yeah I know I'm with no soda at least maybe I can come back up if you really want to three

[00:16:17] Nona: Definitely not like a pizza pocket

[00:16:20] Jacob: Dude there's just not two there's parts of me where like you know looking

[00:16:25] Nona: Forward in the future whenever I have a child I'm like I just want to go live in the woods and not even I don't want you to know the McDonald's exists I don't wait to know that Dr Pepper is a word I don't I just want you to never even learn of any of these terrible foods and things it's definitely hard but at the same time it's like I'm so tired you're gonna eat a box of mac and cheese I don't even care right now but I definitely lean more towards the healthy side so and also my mom owns a juice bar

[00:16:51] Jacob: In town Rogers bar yeah definitely so like augustana share all the time and just like go grind up whatever we've got to plug that real quick you want to let's give a load down real quick do you

[00:17:02] Nona: Think yeah we should I mean it's okay yeah it's a business that we both know but it's also something that if you live around here right did this is a mental health podcast it's super small town my mom opened up raw organic juice bar so it's all organic she just all of a sudden one day I was like I want to I want to do something for me oh cool yeah so and my friend actually down in Redding California he owns like multiple juice bars he started his own roots company um and he's super successful and I was like this is a really great idea there's nothing in town that is healthy for anyone I mean what's the other healthy alternative is just the health food store which nobody

[00:17:44] Jacob: Really mean we have a health food store yeah we do they just moved actually yeah I mean okay but I mean if you compare it so in 2019 2020 it's great there's a lot of places in typical so you go down to Portland it's every half a block you can get and pretty fairly healthy yeah you get the bowls the power bowls so what do you guys have you guys have just like typical how is it healthier than other so I mean it's all organic and she has all of her produce delivered to her so everything is like prepared and washed and up to codes and just she I mean she just has like this crazy insane juicer where you just shove all the vegetables and the fruits inside of it and it just comes out and that's all it is you don't add anything unless you want something

[00:18:34] Nona: Added I mean she has like some crazy

[00:18:37] Jacob: Things like bee pollen people yeah she'll research how do you get bee pollen that's heavy I have zero clue where she gets it from but she'll research all of these crazy things that can help people and that's all I mean

[00:18:51] Nona: That's all my mom has ever wanted to do in her life is she just she's one of those people that will just help anybody anytime anywhere so she loves that

[00:19:00] Jacob: People will come into her store and just be like hey I had this problem you know she I don't know if I could I don't know if I could she has a customer that has ALS okay and she actually gives her a free drink every single day oh and

[00:19:17] Nona: My mom is just like I can't even charge you I can't even make you pay for this because I don't want to she's like I just want to help you right so she'll like research I think the bee pollen was one of the items that she oh she researched because he found it right she was like I want to put all of the ingredients that are gonna help you with your symptoms beautiful and she just

[00:19:38] Jacob: Goes from there I'm not saying she's

[00:19:41] Nona: Everything right you like please don't ask my mom

[00:19:44] Jacob: For me no that's great that's a person that she knew for a long time and that you know I had actually known for a while too well that's the cool thing is when you own your own business and when you live in a small town it's like oh I can do this thing I remember this the way back

[00:20:00] Nona: In the day when I was a young kid and my skateboard had broke in the skate shop owner it was just a small little thing

[00:20:06] Jacob: Like you know that board probably could have cost him $15 but he was able to make my day by like my board had broke and he was like hey man I want you to have this I know you guys will have a lot of money or whatever it was the situation I remember exactly but just like letting someone have a little bit of what you have because it really doesn't hurt you in it you know it's service that's right

[00:20:26] Nona: And like I try to talk to my mom about it and I'll be like hey like you know what are your profit margins like because I'm I used to be into the accounting in my old job and my mom would just be like I don't know I don't know and I'm like mom you're a business owner you have to know honestly I don't

[00:20:43] Jacob: Know you do but I want to provide stuff to her community I'm like do you even know what you're making like profit wise and she's like I don't care well yes she does yeah she just wants to give it out to the community in case everybody we do get caught up with I had on my deejay I had a couple DJs a couple days ago on the podcast and I was talking about how me myself I cornered myself

[00:21:06] Nona: I had a couple years of building a

[00:21:09] Jacob: Mobile DJ's business without realizing I don't want to be a mobile DJ like so I

[00:21:14] Nona: Was like deep into and I just kept accepting gigs and people like can you do this and I'm like of course I can do this and I'm like so I'll get the gear to do this and then a few years like you're into it so I think a lot of people get momentum confused with what

[00:21:27] Jacob: They actually want to do so if she doesn't want to own a bunch of other stores and open a bunch of businesses and make this all this complicated thing then those are the perks that she does and of course any business you should you should keep tracking profit margin but I'm sure she has it all under control that's super cool so that's over right next to Ross in Lane Bryant right McQueen you know what's funny is yesterday on this podcast I had and Bob who used to own the clothing store that was in that location cutting edge which is cool to just have you guys back-to-back well no we dipped our toes a little bit in into the mom life you know our age demographic of a lot of people who listen to this is around is around our age and so I did want to hang up on that a little bit longer what are you know just between you and

[00:22:16] Nona: Brandon you guys is mental health your guys it's like mental just seeing

[00:22:21] Jacob: Life differently just changing just growing up like becoming parents you guys have the house now like all these super exciting things we talked about a

[00:22:29] Nona: Little bit about you working a job that

[00:22:32] Jacob: Was great job but it was comfortable and

[00:22:36] Nona: You didn't feel as fulfilled and I

[00:22:39] Jacob: Think all those things are super related yeah I mean just to touch back also on

[00:22:43] Nona: Like having a significant other that is

[00:22:47] Jacob: Amazing that I will also just a disclaimer to anyone out there that is pregnant that who has a significant other if you have someone that's expecting just take 30 minutes out of

[00:23:00] Nona: The day and have them research postpartum depression mmm I mean I am so lucky that I had Brandon who will literally any question that I have like man I don't know about this he is the first one to pull up his phone pull up Google and start researching like he will say hi this a job and he'll just research all day and just like I wish he would post a tweet once in a while too but that's okay he doesn't but I'm very very lucky that Brandon research as much as he did like he'll come home at the end of the day and be like hey like how are you do you need like time do you need you need to go out and go do something like he's always the first person to be like you need to go do something for yourself like let me watch her you know he research like crazy on postpartum depression so when you do you think it helped me with struggling if I

[00:23:52] Jacob: Did I was right yeah of course because it's you know these are feelings that are new to you're experiencing them alone you're experiencing a lot of things alone for the first time in certain to know that he's looking up these things like he's assuring you it was like he knew what I was gonna go through before I went through it right so that was really nice because he probably read it on reddit your girlfriend will be sad yeah it's like hey I'm gonna stop this crazy train before it even happens

[00:24:18] Nona: So some postpartum depression did you did you anticipate having those feelings like did you even think about that before he brought it up I was thinking that it was gonna be rough just because of I leaned so much on my medication for

[00:24:34] Jacob: Adderall I leaned a lot on that like whenever I was feeling sad or you know down I would take it and then I would just get this huge burst of energy and I would go do something and my mind would be so distracted that I wouldn't even think about it but all of a sudden I didn't have that anymore so I couldn't take it mmm so you have to face whatever comes I actually had to be a human and face what was in front of me which was really hard

[00:24:59] Nona: At times I mean I was doing something that I had never done before and then it wasn't about me for once I was always in control myself but now I'm I have to be in control of a human child that's been way bigger than yeah that has to rely on me for life so that was really difficult and I'm just really lucky that I had someone that actually put in the time in the effort which makes me sad because I feel like I see so many other moms on social media that are reaching out and the person that they should be reaching out to is probably the person that's in the house with them I see I am sure I mean yes I see that on Facebook I don't think a lot of things that he'll post on Facebook what they're saying the words themselves aren't always what their what their meaning I

[00:25:51] Jacob: Think you know it's almost like they're trying to say it to their significant other through a social media yeah well in a lot of times we don't even know that we're pointing out these things right sometimes our brain will trick us our intelligence will try to help us out here with these things so do you know so now on the other side so how do you feel now - are you doing better postpartum depression that you're doing that I'm great I mean like obviously you're a

[00:26:16] Nona: New mom you're gonna have days where you just sit at home and cry but cuz there are things you just can't control and you don't know how to control them so I couldn't imagine I you dude I have a

[00:26:27] Jacob: Shame that I because we've been having the conversation more lately it's something that you know as I've been dealing with my childhood hood stuff that like would pretty much lead me to ignore any like so what do you think about a family in the future Jake or what do you think about this in the future Jake it pretty much that kind of made me like dance around that subject and avoid it so now that I've been dealing with those things and have dealt with them and in working more around them Shane and I are having the more conversations around that too so yeah and I think it's one of those things also where once you have a child

[00:27:00] Nona: It makes you realize why your parents

[00:27:03] Jacob: Did what they did like when I think about it and I'm like oh like you know I didn't have the greatest childhood you know my parents weren't perfect and then I live my life and then I see probably there's a reason why my parents did what they did like you know that they're their own people there were people before they had me so they still are you know trying to mesh their life into my life and you know yeah we forget we just

[00:27:31] Nona: See them as like no you're just my mom that's who you are it's like know that they're a whole person outside of that they're just a whole they got that whole thing going on and that was my biggest issue with I shouldn't say issue that was my biggest struggle with having a child is that I

[00:27:46] Jacob: Was such an independent person and that I was such an outgoing person that all of a sudden I was a mom and that's all I felt like and so every single day it was like you're a mom this is what you do your identity is your identity is stripped yeah that's fair so I mean

[00:28:05] Nona: There are there praise the people that

[00:28:08] Jacob: Can be stay-at-home mothers and just be

[00:28:11] Nona: A stay-at-home mother but for me I knew that's something that I could not do like I have to I have to do something for me also and for me to be the best mom that I can I have to live my life also like I never wanted to be the stay-at-home mom if I was a stay-at-home mom that was only a stay-at-home mom I wouldn't be the best mom that I could for bricks Li and if I am gone for a few

[00:28:41] Jacob: Hours of the day you know which my child is an amazing sleeper so half the time she's asleep anyways in the morning when I'd be gone if I go to work and then I come home and I'm enjoying the time that I'm with her it's gonna mean more than me being with her all day long as a stay-at-home mother and not enjoying the time that I'm with her right because it's so stressful sometimes yeah of course so I'll be a better mother to her if I'm doing more of what I should be

[00:29:12] Nona: Doing and also raising her yeah of

[00:29:16] Jacob: Course no I totally does you have to balance these things you can't just show up like you know you can be in the same room as your child 24/7 if you want but if that means that you don't get a wink of sleep what's the point of you being in the room if you can't fully take care chuckles you're so exhausted or something right you know I mean some people can be a stay-at-home mom and just be the perfect you know Pinterest mother but I know that for me that if I am NOT out in doing what I'm you know creating and doing things that I need to do like physically then I'm fulfilling yourself as a human right if I don't feel like my own self then I'm not gonna be the mother that I need to be for her yeah and then I'm just gonna be miserable and depressed all the time just being a stay-at-home mom you think what's the point of showing up yeah yourself I would rather I would rather be like a hundred percent for you know six hours of the day than 30% for an entire day yes II I have I don't know

[00:30:12] Jacob: If this is super related but so me with meditation is such a huge thing to me know that like I don't use it as like a bailout or like a preparation tool it's a daily thing for me but I do often find myself like I have had a few times where I've been late to something but it's because I had to get a meditation but sometimes when I'm so stressed and have a lot of anxiety going on it's better for me to be 10 minutes late than be on time very

[00:30:38] Nona: Anxious so that 10 minutes that I took to meditate then really calm down made me show up as a better person I apologize for being 10 minutes late yeah I don't know if that's kind of familiar no I mean it is because I feel like to be a new mom there's like it's a

[00:30:56] Jacob: Huge stigma because especially for social media you feel like you have to be at a certain standard yes with the perfect clean house and everything and

[00:31:06] Nona: You can see photos and stuff which is

[00:31:09] Jacob: You know all that stuff is so cool because we can make an art out of green human which is amazing but it's

[00:31:16] Nona: Just more it's more stuff right yeah I almost went in the reverse though okay nobody knew I was pregnant until we get writing remember I said I was like ask if you wanted a beer or something and you're like no and I was I was just like not I was like I have no idea what's going on pretty yeah but nobody knew I was pregnant because I didn't post about it on social media huh uh-huh so nobody actually knew it then I feel like when you start posting more things there are more people that are judging you and so that is a really hard thing

[00:31:51] Jacob: For stay-at-home mothers because you feel like you have to level up to every

[00:31:56] Nona: Other mother that's out there and so I mean I feel like I have a lot of people that will tell me that I don't post

[00:32:04] Jacob: Enough like oh you don't post enough

[00:32:06] Nona: About your kid you don't post enough about this oh I get excited because I see you have a new story and then they'll click on it and it'll be something like woodworking and not my

[00:32:15] Jacob: Child a baby yeah and they'll be like oh I guess so disappointed when you post about your you know here's a picture of a saw and not your kid okay yeah your grandma's like it yeah hey your saw I want to see there again I can't see a baby well is will so that's the thing is

[00:32:31] Nona: That just that represents out loud

[00:32:34] Jacob: The what social media is right we kind

[00:32:38] Nona: Of think that it's all of us and then we get situations like that where you're like it can't be all of us because I'm a mother but I'm also I love woodworking I'm also a carpenter I'm also still a person yeah and you can't like that doesn't mean yeah you can't just like alright this is a cool photo of my table but let me make sure I put my baby on the table so you don't get mad

[00:32:55] Jacob: Right in this photo you know we've just got to be aware that our actions are kind of chosen by other people's opinions sometimes if we're not careful so yeah and then like also too like I

[00:33:06] Nona: Have other people that are mothers that are new mothers and when you talk to them and it's like mom shaming is

[00:33:15] Jacob: Totally real is it I never actually thought it was a trick that I could touch on hmm and actually relate to until it happened to me because I you

[00:33:25] Nona: Know looking it up when I was pregnant like researching and looking into things and then I was like my friends aren't

[00:33:32] Jacob: Gonna be like that like you know my friends are gonna be my friends in supportive no matter what and I've had multiple friends like drop off not even talk to me anymore and then it's crazy because almost sometimes you feel like you can't talk to other moms because like you're like I don't want you to think that I'm doing this like forcing Lango tell the other mom and you try to be supportive but then it's like you almost can't talk to other moms because if you don't do

[00:34:03] Nona: Things the way that they do things you

[00:34:06] Jacob: Know what's funny is if you would all just have the conversation about it you'd realize it like we're all doing those things it's just on Facebook we don't you know it's funny we have these things that get planted in our heads of these perfect here's what you do and here's how you take care of a kid and here's what all the proper way to raise a kid but I mean the truth is that nobody knows the proper way you know I think I think a lot of people are just figuring it out and that's the best of all of us can do if your child is alive and breathing good

[00:34:39] Nona: If your if your kids alive okay so

[00:34:44] Jacob: Let's uh let's transition into guns and carpentry really quick but let's just before that any girls who are around

[00:34:52] Nona: Our age you are pregnant going to be pregnant may be going through like the after postpartum depression do you have any maybe a little bit of advice around that I would say definitely do your research like for as much as the in you

[00:35:06] Jacob: Know the Internet can be a tool as much as a negative I could almost say

[00:35:12] Nona: Is if you do have a significant other just push them if you have to and just

[00:35:19] Jacob: Say hey take 30 minutes you know don't play another episode of the office

[00:35:24] Nona: And just watch this instead just look up some youtubes and just research on postpartum depression because if you know more about it before it actually happens you're gonna be able to prevent it and help it rather than have to deal and go through it and then try to fix it

[00:35:40] Jacob: Right when you and of course you don't think it's gonna happen to you never you know that's how all this stuff happens but I so I actually had to just because of the nature of what I do and how I'm very loud about self-help and stuff I get messages from a lot of people I have had more than one recently

[00:35:57] Nona: Had a baby female friend who has hit me up like I'm not doing so good what's happening was postpartum depression of course did they're doing great now but it was it's something that I don't know because I haven't mentioned that the doctor's office meetings but so do they maybe mention it they say like hey keep it up here's a pamphlet or whatever or is it no it's literally like you'll go in for your checkups and they'll give you a clipboard with questions and you have to sit there and fill them out anyway you're in trouble if you say the wrong things I gave my baby away or it's almost like you're getting a quiz and so you'll want to answer the right way so that you don't have to be in trouble you don't want to get a low score and totally get that so it's almost like you're obliged to like mark the good

[00:36:38] Jacob: Answers so that you don't have

[00:36:41] Nona: Postpartum if that makes any know that

[00:36:45] Jacob: You almost feel like you have to lie right because if you mark the wrong questions you're gonna get a bad score and they're gonna be like oh now it's time to medicate you man so then it's

[00:36:55] Nona: Almost like you just you want to answer the right way I get that I get that well

[00:37:02] Jacob: Okay so just listeners be wary of that's it's okay like known as being she's being honest about it right now I mean it's okay you're gonna have those things man especially in a small town especially with Facebook and all the social media you're gonna want to like show off and be the best mom ever but like sometimes you just you're it's kind of rough I can imagine I mean I couldn't imagine it's if you're going through it's okay and also be prepared for it

[00:37:25] Nona: Learn about it learn about postpartum depression learn about like how different thing is things are going to be and you can and also the guys you know be more like Brandon Bartlett just just be supportive research your stuff look up look up anything about postpartum depression even just for five minutes while you're taking it up do it

[00:37:44] Jacob: [Laughter]

[00:37:53] Nona: Tell me is it about Brandon will

[00:37:56] Jacob: Take my phone and he will FaceTime with my phone on his phone so that he can go poop and watch bricks Lee we got an we have bricks Lee's own iPads so that he can FaceTime the iPad while he goes how is he as a dad I imagine he's probably just so fun amazing yeah like I literally you would you would probably think that he would just be the goofiest

[00:38:25] Nona: Just does he take it serious he

[00:38:28] Jacob: Almost takes it too seriously I love you

[00:38:31] Nona: But sometimes he takes it too serious to

[00:38:33] Jacob: The point where he will get frustrated because I am the mother and I can just do it so easily and like I'm so you know like I could call him a child so fast because she's my dog see right because there's the difference between mom and dad but he'll just be like why can't I call her why can't I do this that would bother me too if I was like because I would want you know like when you're around dogs in a dogs barks at you want to tell the other person like normally dogs like me you want to be that one person who they're like normally my dog hates everyone but they like you always want to be that so if you want to be the around kids know he's amazing I mean I'm very lucky because he's the person that will be like a no I'll get up with her I'll get out he'll get up all the time and I'll get asleep so I mean that dude that takes in new parents I'm sure that takes so much work from both parties so

[00:39:26] Jacob: Again just any new listeners wherever you're at if you're having a child if you're in your pregnancy if you're after your pregnancy if you're a father if your mother just take a note where you're at realize that the other person's writing hurt yeah communicate yes communication is like the biggest thing because if you are quiet and you self-loathing it for too long it will just eat you up alive and if you don't talk about it is just this viral in real quick I do get a little concerned about like echo chambers too with this something I want to touch on like so a lot of us have friends who are you hit

[00:40:02] Nona: Them up and you're like hey for example Brandon's doing this it's really bumming me out in that girl that girl texts you back and she says yeah **** him Brandon sex so yes so yeah be careful

[00:40:13] Jacob: You know you know talk **** lightly and have your fun of course life is worth living of course but be careful of your echo chambers and friends of people who are pregnant be careful of think about the rest of their life not just this moment think about the long-term that what's best for the baby long-term what's best for the for your friend long-term you know if you have a problem with your significant other there is no other person to talk to than your significant other that's so true Donna I like that because that is how it's all

[00:40:40] Nona: Gonna be resolved your if you have a problem that's where it's gonna end up when it's us versus problem not me versus you post one thing on Facebook and all of a sudden it's gonna blow up and then it's just gonna create however I can be even worse yes something that I am obviously like I already have but I will continue to do so is point out just the weird illness and follow of social media I'm not I mean I love social media I think social media is so cool in so many ways but it's there's a lot of weird things that we're noticing now that it's been a couple of years and in our age are the people who were surfing the wave of technology and its coolness and so now we're at this age where were like hey these things are kind of weird and we haven't talked about them and they make us act weird so um carpentry I actually

[00:41:27] Jacob: So my father he was a carpenter he

[00:41:31] Nona: Was a wood worker but circumstance I didn't learn the single I don't know anything about woodworking I also worked at a lumber mill for five years and I ran the machine that smoothes the wood and that's about all I know so yeah at the planer okay yeah so well I worked at the end of the plane I ran the machine that stressed that but So let's just I mean of course you know You're not claiming to be a professional like or you know like just giving everyone all this advice or that you're just the best woodworker ever but you have been making some serious abuse stuff shailen I send it back and forth like the most recent table that you made the hearing one I remember the name for it to you but that's super cool so how did you get into woodworking Nona so I always had the father that would he always wanted voice and of course he ended up with two girls so growing up I was just always you know instead of doing ballet we would lay three tab on her you know roof and I learned how to do that kind of stuff it was always more of like the man's work and so I never

[00:42:38] Nona: Really actually got into it until I had bought my house in Long View I owned a house and I started just doing small projects and started redoing it and just

[00:42:49] Jacob: Improving it and then it just kind of

[00:42:53] Nona: Like grew we were talking about earlier where I had a desk job for seven years

[00:42:59] Jacob: And it just wasn't for me and I would enjoy doing things that were more of like physical labor rather than sitting in a desk and so when I'm doing those kinds of things it doesn't feel like work it feels like I'm just doing what I'm meant to do and so you know more of like the carpentry lately was more of a reason just for me to get out of the house and just get a break from life and you know raising a kid and just take like a break from me time and so when I just started building things and then you know I would slowly start to post about them it was like I got more interest from people where they're like hey what you're building is really cool like what you make is really awesome I want some of this and then you know I all of a sudden kind of have like this weird revelation moment and I up and quit my job of seven years it was crazy and I have a new job with the jage Kelly and going into carpentry well congratulations is super awesome

[00:43:59] Nona: Huge so obviously I want to talk about carpentry but really quickly graze over your we did mention kind of your mindset of like I don't really want to go back to this job

[00:44:08] Jacob: Right it was it was kind of a what am I

[00:44:12] Nona: Doing with my life moment where I kind

[00:44:15] Jacob: Of realized that sitting at a desk wasn't for me because it's not what I enjoy doing so I mean I can go to work for eight hours a day and sit at a desk but I had to be medicated to do it right yeah we were talking about that's kind of how you know you go get ADHD medication and they're like oh now you can properly do this job well it's you know just who you are as a human being you know your soul's essence doesn't do super well at a desk right I had to be medicated to do a job that I wasn't meant to do I if I was doing the job that I was meant to do I wouldn't have to be medicated to do it because it was meant for me that's not what I'm designed to do I mean if I was out work working with wood every single day I wouldn't I don't need it

[00:45:00] Jacob: Right I don't need Adderall but I needed Adderall to sit yeah you do accounting numbers and work there you know because that's not of interest to you any and we all know plenty of people who can look they get to accounting and they love it they're great at it there's some people who like would love to you know if you want to sit at a desk and you do great with it that's totally fine but when you

[00:45:19] Nona: Know in your heart of hearts that like this is uneasy and I'm not focused on this and whatever so woodworking now like what you're able to keep your focus when you're woodworking is just you think it's because you're passionate about it and yeah I mean definitely because I mean I think overall I will say that adderal definitely changed my mindset on how I do things because I know that I can start something and finish it definitely taught me how to do that but more of I enjoy doing it so it doesn't feel like work like what I'm doing doesn't feel like work I mean I

[00:45:54] Jacob: Mean what's it what's the point of what we're doing any times anyway you know we kind of forget that we're not building up to this thing like oh we're gonna live this life once we get this thing we're gonna be happy like I just don't see why not like while in the midst of you doing this thing that is making you long-term happy why not enjoy that too I just don't think we should enjoy one hour of a victory because we suffered for 10 I want to kind of enjoy all 11 hours you know right and so like we were talking about earlier like with medication and

[00:46:23] Nona: Everything and having to be medicated to do a job it almost was kind of a 360 on I'm not meant to do this job even though I was good at it I was making decent money and I had free rein on everything I mean I didn't have a boss that told me what to do every single day and it was an amazing job and it was definitely a job that I would go back to if I had to but I know that it's not something that I want to do anymore because I was not me doing it like I would come home every single day and you know Brandon would say oh you're not happy like I can tell you're not happy of course he could sense that you know right any significant other can tell you that you come home and you still are carrying the weight of work on your shoulders all

[00:47:13] Jacob: Right I mean Shaylee knew that very much but I wasn't willing to tell her that I was so depressed like she knew that I hated my job but I would just always like but it's okay you know I try to like but you do have a cheery guy you're making that paycheck and you're like oh this is a good paycheck I need to do this I need to keep going I need to do this to keep up that comfort is so tempting in a lot of our you know our

[00:47:34] Nona: Age alone but especially our age along with being surrounded by so many mills and in factory blue-collar work or

[00:47:42] Jacob: Whatever it was kind of I guess maybe different for you but you didn't kind of a tomboy upbringing so maybe it was I did yeah obviously with the guns and

[00:47:52] Nona: Everything I'm doing and well so we'll go into guns too definitely but so woodworking specifically so again just congrats like that's so cool that you found something that you enjoy and I like you're able to monetize it which is something that like I don't ever think to really care about that much but it's just something that you enjoy and you're super dang good at it what is it about not woodworking like what did you start with what was your first project that kind of pulled you in well I actually made something for Brandon that was my first project what was it I posted its I don't even know how to

[00:48:34] Jacob: Describe it a geometric it's just it looks kind of tribal ish it was just like a wall art piece and I just like

[00:48:42] Nona: Got so intrigued with making every single angle perfect so that it all fit together and I spent hours and hours I

[00:48:50] Jacob: Was like two years ago three years ago it was like a something that I made for

[00:48:55] Nona: Him for Christmas yeah and it took so much time on it and it and then he like loved it because it was something that you couldn't buy from a store right so that I actually meant something and like I put my heart into it and it's still hanging up in our house oh yeah those things really do kind of as I get older I things like that more than I ever did yeah I mean it definitely took a long time like I was working on it like random hours in the night and definitely like putting everything I had into it and then I did have my house which I sold in Longview and so I completely redid all the cabinets I built doors I tore out all of the carpet by myself I redid all the hardwood floors by myself and the trim so yeah what was your favorite part of that part like if I Cal sided the woodworking part like doing the house like revamp stuff it was kind of like having something that you can see a before and after oh

[00:49:52] Nona: My god I love this wood after before and afters are so satisfied oh man mowing my lawn I think that might be I don't want to narrow down that I love my lawn but like I think it might be just for that one glance before I go in the house at the end I think that's all I do it like five hours of just intricately mowing I want to make it look pristine that three seconds of white right for it on the house and I give a little glance super slightly OCD when it comes to

[00:50:20] Jacob: Things which is very difficult be great with carpentry though it works out for you right but also at the fact that I can never deliver an item until it's like perfect mmm it's like I just builds a table but I like couldn't take it over there until it was to my standards which like some people don't have as high as standards I do yeah it's like oh I just need a table to eat off of but I'm like no do it do it right I'm gonna

[00:50:47] Nona: Do it how did you do the herringbone

[00:50:49] Jacob: One okay so let's also just for any listener describe herringbone just as a challenge but uh how did you do that one to you

[00:50:58] Nona: Herringbone is like a diagonal chevron

[00:51:08] Jacob: Plaid argyle yeah it's like a chevron

[00:51:11] Nona: Like a zigzag I would say this is exactly I decide to be hilarious to make you try to explain with no visual it's

[00:51:21] Jacob: Like a staggered zigzag of course it's hot you made the staggered zigzag piece of wood right and you have to get it to line up you have to do the angles and you have to you know make sure that everything is actually going to line up before you make it perfect and I am the person that will nail everything down and then rip it all up if it's not right so it's like oh do you prefer to be like by yourself in your element when you're doing this yes yeah that's how I I mean my I think there's something to be said about anybody's personal like flow state but me you know a lot of

[00:51:54] Nona: Times even I'm doing a ton of things at once oh I have like different projects that I'm working on throughout five hours so and I'm just like pacing back and forth but if I'm by myself I can kill it I'm just locked into what I need to do and I'm just I'm not even thinking about the time whatever I'm just doing my work you know if it is it similar to you or it's just like a flow State oh yeah like I'll be out in the garage and I'll just be like working on stuff and then all of a sudden Brandon will like open up the door and be like hey you know real well yeah like what's the time what's my time limit on this but it's more of like a break for me than it is a working of course so that's

[00:52:29] Jacob: Just that's fulfilling you know that's the point of doing a finding art and finding things that you enjoy doing and writing what do you see

[00:52:38] Nona: For so lately you've been kind of just doing a little bit of here and there on the woodworking what do you see for let's say pipe dream let's say daydream like what would you enjoy doing would you say with woodworking if all working out pipe dream I'll journey out in my Carpentier apprenticeship and then I will have just mic my own day-to-day projects that I can do out of

[00:53:00] Jacob: My shop yeah do you guys have a shop set up house no we are going to build next summer everything yeah next summer that's not too far away hopefully next summer yeah bypass all of the materialistic items and just go straight for shop right that's what you should do Franek you say he's like everybody keeps asking if we're gonna get married I'm like oh a wedding feels super nice but also we really want to show of course yeah hey what's gonna make your life the best that you know really weigh it out don't try to impress anybody else or do what everybody else wants way out what's gonna be like you know you guys can certainly get married but if that just makes more frugal sense a couple years down the line yeah I would love to learn

[00:53:46] Nona: More about woodworking one of these days like I'm gonna make you show me one of these days because I that's something that I feel like a little kid about it but that it's something that I'm like man that would be cool cuz because I do like when things fit together very exactly I like creating just anything you know I think that I would enjoy woodworking but I yeah I just I just it

[00:54:07] Jacob: Was kind of like skipped around for me

[00:54:09] Nona: So it's interesting to learn um we

[00:54:12] Jacob: Are doing oh we're doing pretty sawing

[00:54:15] Nona: On time but let's uh let's talk about guns so um in the gun world known as southern I so okay so here's why I am interested in just knowing more about guns just say generally as someone

[00:54:31] Jacob: Who I plan on getting a gun soon and I

[00:54:34] Nona: Didn't want to be responsible gun owner I have fired guns like I'm not totally just like I've never touched a gun before I'm comfortable holding a weapon I understand the safety around it

[00:54:46] Jacob: I've shot different types of weapons but I don't have my own it's something that you know before I have my own I want to be comfortable with it I want to have I want to know a lot about the weapon that's in my house Shaylee of course wants to know the same thing but the reason why I'm getting weapon of course self-protection is just nice to have a gun but I've been going by my **** self in the woods a lot lately and I just keep thinking of a cougar attacking me and how defenseless I really am I think I have his knife and I think that I'm gonna like fight a cougar yeah and it's so last time I just went two weeks ago and I had this moment where I was totally chill I was even thinking about Cougars or whatever but I got about a mile and a half and I ran in and then I took my air pod out and then I heard like you know like they yep being like the Coyotes yeah and it turned on

[00:55:39] Nona: This thing where I was like man like I don't really know much about coyotes and if they surrounded me I don't know if a knife I don't know anything about Cody's and then of course that projected me onto this cougar thing because we live in an area where there is Cougars scene so self-protection is something

[00:55:55] Jacob: Obviously you know I'd go pretty deep into the woods these are just on trails but I'm going to bring a gun because I think it's safe what would you say for me as someone who I'm not totally foreign to weapons what would you give me what advice would you give me starting out about weapons I would say definitely if you have someone around you who is accustomed to weapons and who can help you with them definitely reach out we are lucky that we live in a damage that we have social media where you can join any forum where

[00:56:28] Nona: You can YouTube anything I mean if you want to learn how to handle a weapon or even just be comfortable with one you have it all at your fingertips because you have a phone now I totally never even thought about that I'm searching YouTube person but I never even thought about like how to properly handle a weapon Thank You fun attack you can check Instagram like 15 times a day but you will never actually like log on to YouTube to actually research how to do the silliest things right we use our phones more of for basic day-to-day then

[00:56:57] Jacob: Actually to use the internet for what it's meant for I think that show is a perfect example of hey your phone isn't really using you alright you are using phones using this distraction thing right and I'm lucky that I was

[00:57:11] Nona: Able to meet so many amazing people that

[00:57:14] Jacob: Were so knowledgeable about the topic and that I was able to go to

[00:57:20] Nona: Events and to shoot and to learn from Some of the best people like not just the best people but I would say like for women it's easier for women to learn from women so when I would go to three gun shoots I mean I've traveled like pretty far I've been to like Utah and the first one I went to was South Carolina I flew all the way over there and I met some amazing people I mean Maggie Reece Becky Ackley Jenner Eve's there like some of

[00:57:53] Jacob: The biggest names in shooting and to go to Applebee's with them and go hang out with them just like yeah it's like let's talk about guns or what you talked about the whole entire time yeah to go like and I mean it was like a three day four day event where you would go and travel I flew over to South Carolina by myself and it was like it was the worst

[00:58:14] Nona: Experience because hurricane Joaquin hit the coast that weekend so we got completely rained out but it was also the best because I was able to just hang out with the people that we were shooting with who have similar interests as you right and it's a massive group of women that were just there to shoot so all you're doing the whole entire weekend is just talking about guns and you're talking about shooting and you're just learning from like some of the best in the industry yeah and I mean three gun is pretty crazy to wear I

[00:58:46] Jacob: Mean it is thousands and thousands of dollars and you were what's that three good you said yeah so three guns so you're a shooting pistol rifle a shotgun oh okay and it's timed courses so these are those you know those crazy Facebook you know videos that you see where like the six year old girl is running around shooting the gun as fast as she can in the wood and hitting all the targets that's what pretty much what it is they're courses so um I was learning from some of the best people and then growing from that was amazing

[00:59:20] Nona: And just they're always like so welcoming and inviting and willing to help you out with anything that you needed so I could imagine that's kind of where I my confidence from and then also just

[00:59:33] Jacob: Branching out in the gun community from meeting so many different people from going to different activities and just different you know events I was able to meet more people and just keep growing in knowledge would you say that the gun community general blanket statement is welcoming so I could be like at the shooting range I don't know thing I'm like hey man I'm sorry to bother you but I just want to make sure I'm using this weapon correctly could you help me do you think it's like open like that or is this generally I say that with caution because there is like that's a percentage of you know that my tool that's on his computer with his keyboard that's just like oh you're doing this wrong you're such a tool you know you know like just critiquing every single thing that you do look Akiba a keyboard warrior keyboard warrior yeah it's pretty much what it is it's real life he would like there's a small percentage of people especially being a girl I would get that a lot too where I would get messages and it was we

[01:00:39] Jacob: Kind of we kind of touched the topic on that where it was almost degrading because I would get messages from guys where they would message me and say you're a stupid woman you don't know what you're talking about you're just here being a gun bunny they call him gun bunnies but oh like a snow bunny yeah you would be a gun bunny and you would just go out and take pictures of you holding a gun but you wouldn't actually shoot it which there are some women that do that I didn't I

[01:01:07] Nona: Would I loved shooting with such a silly thing to have to argue against Jesus Christ what a waste of your time there

[01:01:13] Jacob: Right you know like some dude messages you that you have to like pull out your phone and look at that **** yeah what a waste of time right jeez so there's a lot of negativity in the gun community but there's also a decent amount of people who are very supportive so that was very nice and also the people that I met along the way were just genuine good human beings who would

[01:01:35] Nona: Want to teach me it was just very

[01:01:40] Jacob: Eye-opening because I learned so much from them that it just made me feel confident about myself which is half the reason why people don't shoot and that people don't carry is because they don't feel confident huh so most people that they don't want to

[01:01:57] Nona: Carry a gun is because they don't know

[01:02:00] Jacob: How to use it of course you know you want to feel comfortable with that thing

[01:02:03] Nona: Right so I mean you can just good you can go out you can buy a gun but if you don't feel confident using it you're not going to feel good about actually meeting it when time comes yeah I think

[01:02:16] Jacob: You know just as much as so my friend Spencer now we talked about if you're going to go to the gym you should you should learn how to have a mindful walk by yourself first like before you're gonna go run and do this first so before you go out just like I need self-protection I'm gonna go buy a gun do you recommend like before you spend your own money on a gun before you do these things like going out and experiencing shooting a gun maybe finding a friend going to a shooting range or something so say a girl wanted a weapon before she just goes and buys one and doesn't know anything about it recommend she goes and learns yeah I would definitely say do

[01:02:49] Nona: Not go to a big-name place do not go to like a sports I don't mean to shame people but don't go to like a Sportsman's Warehouse or like go to somewhere that actually means something go to Bob's go to a small chain retailer then what's the difference to you Nona like just maybe the personable I mean like I don't mean like named Rob but like somebody that Bob's is going to want to inform you more about things than somebody at Sportsman's Warehouse that they're gonna want to just make a commission I agree okay so there's nothing wrong with pointing that out that's right I mean like go to somewhere that's like I mean I use um like well I mean the many places that I go like are I mean go to go to like go to like a small chain cuz small chain people like Gators guns in Kelso is like super low-key and they're honestly a family-owned business so they're more about educating you instead of trying to make a profit off of you of course so they're actually trying to help you they want you to be informed they want you to know what you're going to buy rather than a chain brand that's

[01:03:57] Nona: Trying to make a profit off of you and just make a quota for a sale a big place

[01:04:01] Jacob: Is of course like this guy is he hasn't manager breathing down his neck Lee he better make that sale it's not like does this person need a gun what type of gun do they need what do they know about guns you know these guns are a serious freaking topic you know I don't think they should be taken so lightly you know so I mean if you are just out shopping for a gun and you want to talk to somebody about it definitely try to reach out to people that you know

[01:04:24] Nona: I mean there's never been a time that

[01:04:27] Jacob: I've had someone you know message me say hey I want to learn more about guns or I want to go shooting like I will definitely try to make time in my day and in my schedule to go teach somebody

[01:04:38] Nona: Who wants to learn yeah because as a

[01:04:41] Jacob: Community I'm gonna want somebody who knows what they're doing rather than someone just packing a gun that has no idea I think more people should be less afraid of it I think more people

[01:04:54] Nona: Should learn because I think you

[01:04:57] Jacob: Know I would be willing to bet that a lot of people once they've had a gun if you've never had a gun in your hand once you got out and you shot it for a little bit a couple hours and someone taught you about it and you felt it in your hand and you shot it a couple times and you felt things I mean that alone just interacting with a weapon is enough to break down that like scariness of I think guns are I don't wanna touch this thing you know which you know you can have your opinions on it but I don't know I think that there's a lot of situations there's a lot of craziness in the world where if you want to have a weapon I think that's totally okay I think a lot of people are like oh I'm gonna carry mace but I'll never carry a gun it's like well they're both weapons so you're trying to you know stun or

[01:05:39] Jacob: Hurt somebody that's trying to have you ever experienced mace have you ever I've never experienced never ever either but I've heard that it's um one of those things where it's like I sprayed it in this room and you're in the next room and you're **** like it's like you know we see it at movies where they spray it right in their eyes and obviously they do spray around their eyes for police and whatnot yeah I've heard it's so gnarly that if you're just in the room next door you're near it's just what's terrible is that I'll carry a gun and a knife and I won't carry mace I've never I've never owned

[01:06:07] Nona: Me may see me I will never carry mace but I will carry a knife and I'll carry a gun at least just put him out of his misery what's your have you ever been hunting before liked it when you were younger did you go hunting yes okay what sort of

[01:06:22] Jacob: Hunting what's your background with us

[01:06:23] Nona: So like I would like rifle hunt with my dad bow hunt never actually got anything

[01:06:29] Jacob: With you know it's one of those things that can be so epic if you did you try but like bow hunting is seriously hard I

[01:06:35] Nona: Perhaps to do a bow hunt it's something that's probably because I watched way too much Joe Rogan but I just want to eventually for most of the people that will like go and just say oh you're just driving around in a vehicle like if you actually do it the right way it's pretty hard yeah but I mean growing up I I did more of sports so I did trap team in high school you did the what you say

[01:07:05] Jacob: Trap team yeah like trap Club I know

[01:07:08] Nona: Trap craap yes are you saying that you and your friends sold drugs out of a sketchy house oh no trap and skeet is a different type it's hilarious though like pop culture now the word trap is just so trap team is where you go and

[01:07:25] Jacob: It's actually a sporting event where you stand with five you know other people in a half moon circle and a clay pigeon is shot out of a house and you take turns shooting at it and it's the best out of 25 and that is how you're scored which I

[01:07:42] Nona: Did that in high school for a little

[01:07:45] Jacob: While I also did cheerleading at the same time so guns and cheerleading didn't mix too well so I had to quit

[01:07:54] Nona: Which obviously cheerleading cost more so I had a quit trap but after high school that is how I got back into shooting again was I was a when you call it a co-captain co-captain instructor I mean they both kind of paint the picture because I don't know what you call it why is this word coming to me a coach a coach yeah

[01:08:20] Jacob: Yeah I go as an assistant coach for a

[01:08:23] Nona: Trap team for highschool and so it got back into shooting and that's how I got back into three gun and that's how I started getting all into the gun world

[01:08:31] Jacob: All over again so I know you're not much let's talk about the branch from kind of like you do not as much into it anymore but I do want to but before we go into that and just wrap up for any

[01:08:44] Nona: Sort of like anybody who is interested

[01:08:48] Jacob: In guns anybody who is afraid of guns

[01:08:51] Nona: Who wants one for self-protection they're interested in getting a gun but they're just like I don't know I don't know everybody asked you did you have any advice of like the first steps from not having gun not knowing anything about a gun to learning or getting a gun do you have any I would definitely say if you are hesitant on getting a gun to do your research before you do it reach out to the people that have experience with it I'm definitely 100% always willing to answer a DM if it is about a

[01:09:18] Jacob: Weapon if anybody reaches out to me and says hey I want to go shoot I want to learn more I want to be able to protect myself I'm so willing to go help you because I want you to learn the right way rather than just knowing that people out there have weapons that they're not comfortable with in that course that's almost more scary to me than you know yeah you know a crazy person just out there with a gun but it's almost more teach each other yeah totally willing to share any experiences any knowledge I have and I do not play you know I do not claim to be a professional of course I am willing to share the knowledge that I

[01:09:57] Nona: Have rather than keep it to myself so

[01:10:00] Jacob: Yeah like it's a competition so it's not a competition I'm not trying to be better than anybody else I would rather make everyone you know have what I have but I mean I also don't claim to be 100 well nobody ever said you did it but I do think it I do appreciate that you know offering up so anybody has what's your Instagram handle just for me what's this I'm gonna stuttered yeah so listeners if you're if you're from the area and you have any gun questions or you want to like you just feel uncomfortable about it and you want to feel comfort about it there's no damn shame in that at all so just maybe shoot you a question she'll give me an answer and we kind of touched on it but I dropped off of shooting before I even had a child okay

[01:10:46] Nona: I was dipping into I could say an

[01:10:50] Jacob: Influencer like I started yeah like it

[01:10:53] Nona: Was almost like all of a sudden my Instagram you know follower count started to go up companies are sending

[01:11:00] Jacob: You stuff second picture right so I had

[01:11:04] Nona: A couple companies I actually had a few companies that would send me stuff I mean I had people that like retailers

[01:11:12] Jacob: That would say if you go shoot anywhere we'll send you all your ammo for free if you go you know you just have to use our name I'd say okay I also had companies that would give me just you know loads of money and gift cards for free clothing free advertisement and then it kind of spiraled into will pay you for your advertisement will pay you for your pictures and I was okay with that at first and then it grew into a demand right which I thought I would be comfortable with and I ended up not being comfortable with that's when you kind of realize like oh I don't know this is the part of guns that I like right like everybody wants to be an Instagram influencer like I feel like it's a huge thing like oh I want to be you know like a person that you know it's one of those crazy people that has five hundred thousand followers on Instagram and I got nowhere near that I mean I was probably like it like five thousand which is not a lot you started

[01:12:14] Jacob: To get that uptick for sure though right that like oh here it goes here it goes like yeah I mean if you would have kept doing exactly what you're doing you would have you would have okay in here yeah I mean I had a company that was like paying me you know $50 a photo and so even like $50 a photo you post you know maybe even 15 pictures a month which isn't really that big of a deal for people that active that's just one company right and that actively use Instagram if you post 15 pictures like that's nothing but times I buy $50 a picture you're making a pretty good solid and kind of all the gear that you get to right and I mean they would give me like gift cards of like $500 yeah and it's like that's a good sized gift card right there right and I had boxes and boxes of

[01:13:01] Nona: Clothing just like hanging around my house which just created clutter and then it got to a point where all of a

[01:13:08] Jacob: Sudden one day I was taking pictures and

[01:13:13] Nona: Taking of course everyone takes selfies I was over analyzing them and I was over

[01:13:20] Jacob: Analyzing them to a point where I wasn't

[01:13:23] Nona: Feeling good about myself and so this

[01:13:26] Jacob: Company would be messaging me and saying hey we need you to post you know two pictures a week and I physically could not bring myself to do it I would sit there and I would sit there for an hour look at a photo look at all these self I mean I would take 100 photos and then try to pick the best one and then out of picking they're just like one sweatshirt angle right like one t-shirt you're trying to take the best picture and you would critique yourself to the point where you didn't feel good about yourself and so I would take me hours and I'm like nobody else has this problem like you should be able to post a selfie like no problem and I would sit there and look and look and look and look and look and I couldn't do it and so one day I got to the point where I couldn't do it to the point of almost breaking down and having to message this company and I said I can't do this anymore and they're like well why not

[01:14:23] Jacob: Why can't you take a selfie and just post it like we're paying you it's easy we're sending you free clothes free money why can't you do this and I just didn't feel good about myself I critiqued myself over to the point where

[01:14:37] Nona: I didn't like myself mm-hmm and it got to the point where I almost felt bad for

[01:14:46] Jacob: The people that I knew that do like Instagram influencing where you feel for them and you just have to quit and that

[01:14:56] Nona: Was me and so like you can definitely like scroll through my Instagram feed if you look at all the pictures like small and you can see where I started doing guns and shooting and I got really into it and it grew and it got big and then it just stopped and I quit and even to this day it still kind of affects me because I can take a bunch of pictures and I still won't post them I don't post a lot so now you second guess what you should or shouldn't be posting right in it you should just be this thing that you don't think about you're like this is my Instagram because whatever I want right but now I have a bunch of people and I mean I don't have like quite a fall I mean I like a few thousand followers but like some of them still

[01:15:40] Jacob: Follow me for the pack you know that I shotguns right but I don't really post about guns anymore so a lot of them

[01:15:47] Nona: Unfollowed me yeah so I felt like I almost had like a stigma that I had to keep up with it to satisfy other people well you have that's the thing is like these people like that person that I was

[01:16:00] Jacob: And when you come to realize that I'm not always that person like you know I can't be that person and I was really into that person for a while but it's not who I am fully and then it feels kind of weird like I mean you know we gotta remember technology social media that's a new thing for a man's it feels weird to like you know even having people unfollow you because you're not into that thing no more like oh so I'm not interesting do you know and it's nothing against them it's like dude you should definitely not follow things that you're not interested in I think everybody should follow that but it's a weird thing right it's it definitely does something different in our brains yeah and I just it got to me where I felt so bad doing it that I didn't want

[01:16:44] Nona: To encourage it anymore and then when I started to see other people who were posting all these things and when I would scroll through a feed and see a product and I would see it and it's like I need this but do I actually need this or do I need it because someone else is telling me I need this yeah you wouldn't know you need it if in your son right so I don't want to be that person that pushed other products on people because they didn't meet it I didn't want to

[01:17:10] Jacob: Push it because I don't want to be the pushin person like the person pushing it on other people it's a position that you never thought you realize existed right you're like I didn't run said I would be even in this position to where I would have to be second guessing like my you know am i treating other people's time as valuable you know it's something you have to actually kind of think of as influencer right or even just stepping into the foot of it of an influencer it's this new thing that's super cool and awesome but then it happened you know like you or someone I think what's happening what happened with you is you never thought that kind of **** what happened to you would be no never you know it's crazy cuz then like I mean just like this smallest like you know the John Wick movies where it's I love John Wick but it's when I first started shooting the guy who trains John Wick the Turin tactical guy he messaged

[01:18:06] Nona: Me on Facebook and he was like hey

[01:18:09] Jacob: Thanks for the ad like great to you know connect with you and I had no clue who he was so I totally brushed it off but

[01:18:17] Nona: Like at that moment when I come back to it I was like shoot I could have been I could have been something maybe I could have went down there and like hung out with him and like learned from him but at the time I was like so young and kind of like naive to the whole like Instagram influencing kind of thing where I was just touching my toes in the water and I got out of it so fast that I

[01:18:39] Jacob: Like it wasn't it wasn't healthy for me yeah I mean that's the thing is you know you could have although that would have been probably awesome and I'm sure you wouldn't have regretted it by any means but you know maybe that would have sucked you a little bit farther maybe this whole like in between I don't know how I feel about this thing man that would have lasted a couple years if you would have done that you know sometimes we get sucked into I was talking about like my mobile DJ gig I you know I was a few years into mobile DJ until I realized so I was like I don't want to be mobile too ya know you know opportunities are wonderful but if they don't really match we got to take a step back Mike to smash our end goal like does this make me happen in the long term you know so now that

[01:19:20] Nona: You don't so I feel like you stopped the momentum of like the Instagram influence are coming at you so sort of

[01:19:28] Jacob: Thing and then you know just family in a child

[01:19:33] Nona: And ranan just different things where

[01:19:35] Jacob: You at with just the enjoyment of shooting guns and that sort of thing now I definitely it's more of since I have a child I feel like I need to have more protection especially in this day and age I don't know she's well I see all of those posts on Instagram I'm not even Instagram at Facebook where it's like the sex child trafficking where my child was almost stolen at the store like some guy was following me around this is my boil makes my boy so mad where I just want to be like I gotta get a gun be the mama bear that you say you are yeah there you go I just want to like hey there's nothing wrong with that I you know I think that we should all find ways to protect ourselves you know where it's a different view for us we live in a place where it is safe to walk to the store

[01:20:34] Jacob: There's a woman you know for the most part I'm sure you guys you probably have thoughts in your head that I've never even fathomed you know just being a woman you know I always think of like walking to your car in the dark as a woman that's a different experience than me yeah of course definitely is so you just have a different life but I think that in places like busy places and in situation you just brought up like people being proud and unsafe places you don't be afraid to protect yourself don't be afraid male or female and that's the thing you know if you don't know much about guns like even as a guy you don't have to be a stud with know everything about guns just to get one for protection like you can have a gun if you want protected and feel safe and you can just have a basic

[01:21:20] Nona: Knife like some ninja stars yeah or a

[01:21:24] Jacob: Longbow all right Nona if you had to okay Lord of the Rings version so if there was this fight and you had to choose like what your character is like your this for 10 years this you got a your if you choose a dwarf or your dwarf what are you gonna be I'm going to choose Legolas I'm well I would want a wizard staff Oh **** you just you just cheated I forgot about that all right well I'm just **** fighting dwarfs and I'm fighting with a 9-mil at home I'm taking a wizard staff out to the grocery store mill at home I got

[01:22:01] Nona: This wizard staff epic all right well

[01:22:05] Jacob: We're getting up here in time let's go ahead and round it out let's say if you have any little small bits of advice for any listeners you want to leave them with anything if you need a weapon to

[01:22:17] Nona: Protect yourself if you need a weapon to protect yourself to get a **** switchblade notice other I appreciate

[01:22:26] Jacob: You thank you for offering these listeners a little bit of advice and a little bit of a different perspective thank you for being brave and sharing the newness of life that you're

[01:22:37] Nona: Experiencing lately I feel like

[01:22:39] Jacob: Listeners and me got a lot got a lot of those conversations so Nona Southard I appreciate you and listeners if you have any questions about guns or protecting yourself or just being a badass person

[01:22:51] Nona: New mom things or new moms death mom support mom's mom support mom's just cheap shooter message Wynonna Southard on Instagram and then just touching on one more time postpartum depression it's very real it's very ok yes it's a

[01:23:04] Jacob: Very normal thing yeah talk about a lot yeah and then also just on that same

[01:23:09] Nona: Page girls moms of small communities none of you are against each other no you're not against each other mom shaming is not cool yeah that shit's corny be nice you know seriously be nice

[01:23:21] Outro: Be nice all right Junkyard Love Podcast out